Fertility treatments, what are your opinions?

[Red.Apricot]

I certainly don't understand the mentality behind it. And you definitely didn't make it any more clear. Like, you KNOW your kid will suffer, might live in constant pain, might die young and live a life that no one should be forced to live, but you're going to make them anyway? I don't get it, no. Smaller things I understand. More serious genetic diseases with no known cure or treatment, definitely not.

I have a disease that's pretty serious; I've had to have major surgery, and I have a shortened life expectancy. I have to be on medication, and there are things that cause me pain.

I also have allergies, which suck too.

But, despite my medical hardships, I love my life. I'm glad I get to live it. My life is wonderful.

 

[JessLough]

So should everybody have to go get full blood panels testing for every disease under the sun before having sex, in the case that a child should be born? Should they have to be tested for every disease before getting married, in case a child should be born? I mean, many, many diseases are recessive, and a carrier shows no signs.

 

[CharlieDog]

:hail: :hail: :hail:


I have autism and I'm certainly not living a life "nobody should be forced to live." I know multiple people with schizophrenia, but one in particular, and she in NO WAY is living a life "nobody should be forced to live." This type of thought it extremely bigoted and highly offensive.

Yes. Bigoted is the word I was looking for. I ended up using a lot of other ones though, lol.

And exactly. I quite enjoy my life most of the time, despite the fact that I understand, logically, it's harder with this disorder to do quite a lot of things. There are things that neuro-typical people do that I will never understand, but I'm certainly not going to try and stop them from doing it. I'm also not being "forced" to live this way.


And the thing about veggie children is slightly different. That's more of a "will to live" sort of thing vs "right to live". And I have the right to live my life however I want, if I want to have children or not, it's up to me.

The sorry state that society would be in if your doctor was allowed to mark out a box like on an AKC registration for limited registration is mind boggling. People are supposed to be capable of higher thought, compassion and empathy, but it's incredibly rare that I see any of that in threads like these.

 

[AllieMackie]

So should everybody have to go get full blood panels testing for every disease under the sun before having sex, in the case that a child should be born? Should they have to be tested for every disease before getting married, in case a child should be born? I mean, many, many diseases are recessive, and a carrier shows no signs.

And then we become the film Gattaca.

 

[AdrianneIsabel]

If you ask my boyfriend with type1 diabetes he will tell you his life is worth living, no matter the potentially shorter life span and pain associated with it. His accomplishments, thus far and beyond, have been vast.

If you ask me with my mothers ocd I would say, I'm worth it, I enjoy my life. Thank you, I make it count.

If you ask my sister with her ocd, her phi beta kappa, law degree, and doctorate, I know she'd say the most amazing accomplishment she's had to date is her son and soon to be daughter.

No one is perfect and frankly those who are tend to be the weakest of character. There are of course limits but within reason I find it asinine to presume a defect, potentially genetic or not,should make reproducing a non-option.

 

[JessLough]

No one is perfect and frankly those who are tend to be the weakest of character. There are of course limits but within reason I find it asinine to presume a defect, potentially genetic or not,should make reproducing a non-option.

You're wrong. Rosey is perfect.

 

[AdrianneIsabel]

Well so is Shamoo but we can't all be the Rosey and Shamoos of the world... Sigh...

 

[Airn]

If you had a choice of having a baby with a condition or one without, what would you choose?

I personally would NOT choose one with a condition (for lack of a better word.) That is not to say that I would love and care for my child if it ended up having a condition.

My brother has ADHD and mild Aspergers'. If I could make him not have those, I totally would go that route.

In an ideal world, we would all have perfect children, without any medical problems. I think it's honorable that Lyzelle doesn't want to put the burden of medical problems on a child. I don't think she has meant for this to sound as harsh as some people are taking it.

 

[AdrianneIsabel]

I would weigh the pros and cons. There is a chance my children or their grandchildren will have type1diabetes. There is a very strong chance my girls will have ocd, adhd, anxiety, and addiction; I would still have them. You're painting those of us with imperfections as victims and unable to better the world around us.

Yes, there are limits but for the most part I like to believe I would be strong enough to see the good and potential in my children, not the imperfection alone.

 

[Red Chrome]

Is this a serious question? I mean really?

I view this type of question the same way I view "Is BSL ok?" Almost everyone would give a resounding no to that one....so......

As someone who suffers with a genetic issue, nothing major, I feel my life is worth something.

As the sister of someone who has some severe genetic issues and is battling them and fighting with everything he has, his life is worth living. He has 2 beautiful little boys and a family that loves him more than people could ever imagine. My little brother is one of the best people you'd ever meet, most people write him off because of his issues, they miss out on knowing someone that is amazing. That's their fault and loss.

This thread amazes me and not in a good way.

 

[Saeleofu]

My brother has ADHD and mild Aspergers'. If I could make him not have those, I totally would go that route.

But how does HE feel about that? I'd be willing to bet he wouldn't agree with you there. I know I certainly wouldn't make my autism "go away." My anxiety, yes, but in the last 2 year the anxiety actually has mostly gone away (I feel like I have my dogs and dog sports to thank for that.)

 

[SevenSins]

Yes. Bigoted is the word I was looking for. I ended up using a lot of other ones though, lol.

I said I had a problem with it, not that I don't support the right of others to make the decision (just like I'm vehemently against circumcision, for example, but am also against laws which outlaw it; I'd rather see people educate themselves and make informed decisions, regardless of the subject). Pretty sure I don't meet the requirements of being defined as a bigot in this scenario.

 

[adojrts]

I have only skimmed this thread. I hope I am not repeating what has already been said. But IF everyone had to be screened, educate themselves and so dearly desired a child to the point of heart ache as the folks that do have go the fertility route, then there wouldn't be so many unwanted pregnancies or children born into questionable situations.

 

[Airn]

But how does HE feel about that? I'd be willing to bet he wouldn't agree with you there. I know I certainly wouldn't make my autism "go away." My anxiety, yes, but in the last 2 year the anxiety actually has mostly gone away (I feel like I have my dogs and dog sports to thank for that.)

He probably wouldn't agree with me. Because his medical problems are a part of who he is. At least I hope he feels that way. I realize our faults are part of us and most people wouldn't want to change them.

I was just trying to see things from Lyzelle's point of view. I like doing that. I don't mean to offend people with medical issues.

But I will say, I would trade in some of my medical issues. Like PCOS or many other problems that haven't been professionally confirmed. I don't want ALL of my faults.

 

[Saeleofu]

I would trade in some of my medical issues. Like PCOS

I'd trade in the hairiness and weight gain of PCOS, but I'd like to keep the lack of periods, thanks Seriously, naturally not having periods and being able to plan when it's most convenient to have them (medically induced) is BRILLIANT and I couldn't be happier. The other bits...yeah, those can go away lol.

 

[Airn]

I'd trade in the hairiness and weight gain of PCOS, but I'd like to keep the lack of periods, thanks Seriously, naturally not having periods and being able to plan when it's most convenient to have them (medically induced) is BRILLIANT and I couldn't be happier. The other bits...yeah, those can go away lol.

I take birth control that means I have 4 periods a year. I'm alright with that. Although I can't say it's a great alternative.

 

[puppydog]

I suffer from anxiety and depression. I have some sort of unconfirmed arthritic disorder in my hips that makes winter painful but I am very happy to be alive and I choose to have children.

My mother is VERY ill. We nearly lost her about 18 months ago. It was close as darnit. Her conditions are inheritable. I'm very glad she chose to have me. Granted, she didn't know she was sick all those years ago but hey.

My mother also battled infertility for 6 years to have me. They gave up on fertility treatments and had me, so I'm not technically a fertility baby, but I certainly can't be against it.

 

[Grab]

I, personally, would not have undergone fertility treatment if we'd been unable to conceive. But, that's my choice for my own body. How anyone else acquires their children..be it "naturally", through fertility treatments or through adoption is of no concern to me.As I feel it should not be.

 

[CharlieDog]

I said I had a problem with it, not that I don't support the right of others to make the decision (just like I'm vehemently against circumcision, for example, but am also against laws which outlaw it; I'd rather see people educate themselves and make informed decisions, regardless of the subject). Pretty sure I don't meet the requirements of being defined as a bigot in this scenario.

I understand that. The issue I had, personally, is it sounded like there was support for making decisions for others, or looking down on them for those decisions. I'm completely in favor of allowing people to make informed choices on their own, including what to do with and put in their bodies. I'm not for circumcision as an example either, but I don't believe outlawing it is the correct choice. More helpful would be to educate and allow people to make their own decisions. I think in that case, informing people that it DOES NOT help with a lot of the things they think it will would be more beneficial to society as a whole than outright banning it.

So I think, in that regard (as to what people do with themselves) we're on the same page.

I think I'm upset more so because it was portrayed as selfish and uncaring to have a child if you have an inherited disease. I don't think that's the case at all, and I agree that it seems like we're victims of circumstance, and unable to have a meaningful or full life because of it. It's not like that at all, I don't think. I wouldn't trade my experience for anything. Just as I'm sure most of you wouldn't either.

 

[spiffy]

As Fran says, undergoing fertility treatments is a personal decision. I have no opinion on the matter. Who am I to judge a couple that wants to do everything to have a kid?