Hey guys,
I know I don't come on often anymore, but I could really use some advice, as I just don't know anyone knowledgeable to ask in this situation...
I've been dating a guy for about 1.5 months...and we've been taking things pretty slow. Today he dropped the bomb that he was previously married for 7 years & has 3 kids.
I'm 26...he is 32.
Had he told me that on the first date, it woulda ended there. Not cause of the marriage...but because of the kids.
He DOES want to get married again & does want more kids. he has a good relationship with the kids, but really doesn't see them much (they come for about 4 wks in the summer & sometimes spring break), but they live in Cali now.
Minus the kids, I have no reservations about the guy. He is willing to answer any q's i have, but I honestly don't even know what ones to ask.
My biggest one was if he wants to move to Cali to be closer, and he said while it would obvs be ideal, his future wife/gf/whatever would come first, and she would have to be ok with it. I think he obvs wants someone who will be involved with the kids when they are around, but they have a mom & are about to get a step-dad, so it doesn't seem like he is looking for a new mom for them or anything.
This is something sooooo outta my realm. I'm still absorbing it. I overanalyze the crap outta things, but I'm like at a loss here.
Right now, since the kids are so far away, its kinda like 'whatever', but I dont know if there are other big things I should be thinkng about that are just not occurring to me.
help?
I know I don't come on often anymore, but I could really use some advice, as I just don't know anyone knowledgeable to ask in this situation...
I've been dating a guy for about 1.5 months...and we've been taking things pretty slow. Today he dropped the bomb that he was previously married for 7 years & has 3 kids.
I'm 26...he is 32.
Had he told me that on the first date, it woulda ended there. Not cause of the marriage...but because of the kids.
He DOES want to get married again & does want more kids. he has a good relationship with the kids, but really doesn't see them much (they come for about 4 wks in the summer & sometimes spring break), but they live in Cali now.
Minus the kids, I have no reservations about the guy. He is willing to answer any q's i have, but I honestly don't even know what ones to ask.
My biggest one was if he wants to move to Cali to be closer, and he said while it would obvs be ideal, his future wife/gf/whatever would come first, and she would have to be ok with it. I think he obvs wants someone who will be involved with the kids when they are around, but they have a mom & are about to get a step-dad, so it doesn't seem like he is looking for a new mom for them or anything.
This is something sooooo outta my realm. I'm still absorbing it. I overanalyze the crap outta things, but I'm like at a loss here.
Right now, since the kids are so far away, its kinda like 'whatever', but I dont know if there are other big things I should be thinkng about that are just not occurring to me.
help?