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I belong to a small training club. We are not large. But for such a small club, we still host many many agility trials of CPE, NADAC, and UKC every year. We are often low on help and the help we do have all also run our dogs... but we make it happen.
However, for our biggest show of the year in which we hold a trial that offers ALL three venues at once, we often need to bring in extra help and ask newer members of the club that don't normally help to come by and help. We are also allowed to invite friends and family members to help. And in return, after the day of hard work we get a BBQ and usually its all very nice and relaxing after a hard day.
This year, though I was hesitant, I asked Dustin if he'd like to help. It'd give him a chance to see what I really do, meet my dog training family, and see me for parts of the day when I'm not busy, as well as stay at my house over the entire weekend. And because he's no dog trainer, I invited him to an agility class tonight to see what it was all about just for a small taste before the big trial. Things went okay. He sat and watched, held dogs for me, made friends with my rescue dogs(that I do not own). He kept quiet and helped move equipment. He was respectful and friendly. Well, we always have to move the equipment back across the street to the training building to store it because we use the fairgrounds to practice on. After we got all the stuff packed and I was packing up my stuff(class was officially over), Dustin thought he'd get even from earlier and spray me a bit with water from a water bottle. We get over to the building to help unloadand pack up all the stuff, where Dustin again offered his help for free even though he absolutely did not have to but chose to, and my trainer stops and asks me about why my back was wet. She'd been in an okay mood earlier, so I just laughed and said "must've sweated a whole lot tonight!" jokingly. She didn't think it was funny. Started yelling at me. Dustin jumps in to say, "I'm the one that sprayed her" trying to defend me, and she yells at him. On and on, being rude and yelling at my boyfriend.
Now, I"m used to that kind of abuse. I grew up with it from my mom, I grew up with it from my trainers... I'm used to it. I just take it. But Dustin is not used to it. He's usually not the type to just let people yell at him when they have no right. He cant' understand why I do take it. I did give him a concerned look, and he knew I didn't want him to say anything back... so he didn't. I feel absolutely horrible. I got him yelled at, and I wouldn't even let him defend himself. He tells me its okay, but its different. I at least train there. I'm used to the abuse. He should NOT have to take it..but I asked it of him.. he knew it'd cause problems and he knows how much I love my rescues so he didn't do anything..
She has NO right to be so disrespectful towards a person that was going to offer his work and help for FREE on a hard, hot, looong weekend. She might expect and demand us that train at the club to be her slaves, but how can she even BEGIN to think she has some right to treat others that way is beyond me. But no one has the balls to stand up to her.
Needless to say, he's not coming this weekend. I told him he didn't have to and I know he probably woudln't. Told him she had no right and said he does NOT have to give his free work to such an old bitter woman that treated him so badly.
I know I sound angry. And typing it out, I am offended and angered at that she treated him that way. But I did not react angrily at all. In fact, I just kept quiet, head down, and mostly sad.
But, to ligthen it up a bit... all of us kids in the club have a saying.. "Are they dead already?" (They are verrrry olld and don't believe in going to doctors.) I know that sounds horrible, but it is all said in joke.
However, for our biggest show of the year in which we hold a trial that offers ALL three venues at once, we often need to bring in extra help and ask newer members of the club that don't normally help to come by and help. We are also allowed to invite friends and family members to help. And in return, after the day of hard work we get a BBQ and usually its all very nice and relaxing after a hard day.
This year, though I was hesitant, I asked Dustin if he'd like to help. It'd give him a chance to see what I really do, meet my dog training family, and see me for parts of the day when I'm not busy, as well as stay at my house over the entire weekend. And because he's no dog trainer, I invited him to an agility class tonight to see what it was all about just for a small taste before the big trial. Things went okay. He sat and watched, held dogs for me, made friends with my rescue dogs(that I do not own). He kept quiet and helped move equipment. He was respectful and friendly. Well, we always have to move the equipment back across the street to the training building to store it because we use the fairgrounds to practice on. After we got all the stuff packed and I was packing up my stuff(class was officially over), Dustin thought he'd get even from earlier and spray me a bit with water from a water bottle. We get over to the building to help unloadand pack up all the stuff, where Dustin again offered his help for free even though he absolutely did not have to but chose to, and my trainer stops and asks me about why my back was wet. She'd been in an okay mood earlier, so I just laughed and said "must've sweated a whole lot tonight!" jokingly. She didn't think it was funny. Started yelling at me. Dustin jumps in to say, "I'm the one that sprayed her" trying to defend me, and she yells at him. On and on, being rude and yelling at my boyfriend.
Now, I"m used to that kind of abuse. I grew up with it from my mom, I grew up with it from my trainers... I'm used to it. I just take it. But Dustin is not used to it. He's usually not the type to just let people yell at him when they have no right. He cant' understand why I do take it. I did give him a concerned look, and he knew I didn't want him to say anything back... so he didn't. I feel absolutely horrible. I got him yelled at, and I wouldn't even let him defend himself. He tells me its okay, but its different. I at least train there. I'm used to the abuse. He should NOT have to take it..but I asked it of him.. he knew it'd cause problems and he knows how much I love my rescues so he didn't do anything..
She has NO right to be so disrespectful towards a person that was going to offer his work and help for FREE on a hard, hot, looong weekend. She might expect and demand us that train at the club to be her slaves, but how can she even BEGIN to think she has some right to treat others that way is beyond me. But no one has the balls to stand up to her.
Needless to say, he's not coming this weekend. I told him he didn't have to and I know he probably woudln't. Told him she had no right and said he does NOT have to give his free work to such an old bitter woman that treated him so badly.
I know I sound angry. And typing it out, I am offended and angered at that she treated him that way. But I did not react angrily at all. In fact, I just kept quiet, head down, and mostly sad.
But, to ligthen it up a bit... all of us kids in the club have a saying.. "Are they dead already?" (They are verrrry olld and don't believe in going to doctors.) I know that sounds horrible, but it is all said in joke.