Treat young offenders more harshly
- Thread starter DryCreek
- Start date
Well yeah... I have another friend... very controlling mom... actually step mom.
He put up with it and was very compliant. His sisted left home when she was 16.
It all depends on the person and how they deal with things... but being very involved isn't always the best solution for every child.
And no I don't have any kids... I just have my own personal experiences with getting into trouble at school, alcohol, drugs etc that are common problems these days and watching how some of those people turn out. I'm 25 now and it's interesting to see who went somewhere and who didn't and how that compared to everybody in highschool in there teens.
He put up with it and was very compliant. His sisted left home when she was 16.
It all depends on the person and how they deal with things... but being very involved isn't always the best solution for every child.
And no I don't have any kids... I just have my own personal experiences with getting into trouble at school, alcohol, drugs etc that are common problems these days and watching how some of those people turn out. I'm 25 now and it's interesting to see who went somewhere and who didn't and how that compared to everybody in highschool in there teens.
Good point SharkyX
My cousin was a good example. Now don't get me wrong she is a very nice girl and isn't a criminal or into drugs but her mom was VERY over protective. They bugged her about what she wore (nothing revealing she just wore a lot of black and goth type stuff no big deal) about who she hung out with, where she went, what time she was home. these are all fine practices and a parent should take this kind of interest.
However, she started dating a boy that they finally approved of. She got pregnant at 16 and had the baby. The boys PARENTS.... refused to allow him to be a part of the baby's life and would not allow him to have anything to do with her. You see you never really know what can happen even if they are perfectly nice kids with seemingly perfectly nice parents. This is a perfect example of "things aren't always what they seem"
My parents were ... less than strict. I had a curfew and was expected to do chores and the usual but they didn't follow everything I did and everyone I talked to. For me, that approach worked very well. I have no criminal record as a teen or an adult. MANY of my friends who had overbearing parents ended up pregnant or drug addicts at 16, some of those friends got caught stealing or have other criminal records. Having that kind of freedom and respect from my parents taught me that I have to EARN what I get. If I wanted trust and freedom I had to prove that I could handle it. if they gave me the freedom and I walked all over it I had to suffer the consequences. I learned responsibility. I think THAT is a key. Teaching responsiblity. No one is responsible for your actions but YOU and you alone must deal with the repercussions. That worked for me.
You really have to find the approach that works for your childs personality. I got that kind of freedom because I proved that I was capable of handling it. Had I proved my "worthiness" and they were still overbearing I think I might have rebelled and lashed out. So whats good for the goose is not always good for the Gander.
My cousin was a good example. Now don't get me wrong she is a very nice girl and isn't a criminal or into drugs but her mom was VERY over protective. They bugged her about what she wore (nothing revealing she just wore a lot of black and goth type stuff no big deal) about who she hung out with, where she went, what time she was home. these are all fine practices and a parent should take this kind of interest.
However, she started dating a boy that they finally approved of. She got pregnant at 16 and had the baby. The boys PARENTS.... refused to allow him to be a part of the baby's life and would not allow him to have anything to do with her. You see you never really know what can happen even if they are perfectly nice kids with seemingly perfectly nice parents. This is a perfect example of "things aren't always what they seem"
My parents were ... less than strict. I had a curfew and was expected to do chores and the usual but they didn't follow everything I did and everyone I talked to. For me, that approach worked very well. I have no criminal record as a teen or an adult. MANY of my friends who had overbearing parents ended up pregnant or drug addicts at 16, some of those friends got caught stealing or have other criminal records. Having that kind of freedom and respect from my parents taught me that I have to EARN what I get. If I wanted trust and freedom I had to prove that I could handle it. if they gave me the freedom and I walked all over it I had to suffer the consequences. I learned responsibility. I think THAT is a key. Teaching responsiblity. No one is responsible for your actions but YOU and you alone must deal with the repercussions. That worked for me.
You really have to find the approach that works for your childs personality. I got that kind of freedom because I proved that I was capable of handling it. Had I proved my "worthiness" and they were still overbearing I think I might have rebelled and lashed out. So whats good for the goose is not always good for the Gander.
If they did that to a family member of mine, I wouldnt want them to be safe in a jail. I would want to be able to get to them. It has nothing to do with being compassionate. On my end of it I have seen way more good people effected adversely by the system than bad people effected positively by it. I know some good hearted kids that made some mistakes and they cant get jobs because of it. That only makes them do more crime.
Most prisoners have to fight for their lives everyday. They can't relax. Not even at night. They can't fully trust anyone and they can't turn their backs on anyone. I don't think any amount of cable tv or cigarettes is going to make their life that much better. What it does do is make the lives of security guards better. At least the prisoners can amuse themselves and have one less thing to fight about. Take away those 'rights'? Sure. But you might as well keep the in solitare. And if they are going to do that you might as well kill them. And that's coming from someone who is not fond of the death penalty.
Yeah well I look at Paul Bernardo. He is in solitary confinement. Much to easy life for him. I wish he did have to fight for his life. Give him to the inmates and let them show him the pain and suffering he put his victims through.
Sorry I just can't feel sorry for murderers. They have to fight for their lives.... awwww TOO BAD. They should have thought about that before taking someone else's life who did have the chance to fight for their lives. At least they still have lives. I still say no TV no cigarettes. Bare minimum. period.
Of course, I don't think petty criminals and viollent criminals should be kept in the same facility. Violent criminals deserve NOTHING. They sealed their own fate. They had a choice. Their victims didn't.
Sorry I just can't feel sorry for murderers. They have to fight for their lives.... awwww TOO BAD. They should have thought about that before taking someone else's life who did have the chance to fight for their lives. At least they still have lives. I still say no TV no cigarettes. Bare minimum. period.
Of course, I don't think petty criminals and viollent criminals should be kept in the same facility. Violent criminals deserve NOTHING. They sealed their own fate. They had a choice. Their victims didn't.
But that would be a whole new can of worms.............who gets to decide what criminal goes where?
Should a woman who has taken her last beating and kills her boyfriend/husband go to the same place as someone who robbed a store and shot someone in cold blood? They are both violent crimes.......................
Should a woman who has taken her last beating and kills her boyfriend/husband go to the same place as someone who robbed a store and shot someone in cold blood? They are both violent crimes.......................
Well around here I think that is less likely since technically if you walk in on your spouse cheating on y ou, you can shoot them as long as you don't leave the room to get your gun. and if someone enters your home here you can shoot them as well. So around here that is totally different. But it is still a judge's decision I suppose.
My parent's were EXTREMLY over protective, but there was one family who's parent's were even more then mine...I didn't think that was possible...but...they were.:lol-sign: Those kids went absolutely crazy when they got out on their own and got into soooooooooooooooo much trouble. I think that part of being a good parent is standing back to a certain extent to allow our children to make some decisions and mistakes on their own. It's so hard though.
Sooooooooooo tremendously hard.
I was out to dinner with my son last evening. There were some fairly young parents with a brand new baby. Brandon said "mom...look at that little baby...isn't she cute"? I said..."yes...she really is....see how her dad is so protective over her and how dependent she is for everything on them"? He agreed. I told him that he needs to remember this conversation when he's a dad someday, and then he'll understand how hard it is to see your children hurting....or in trouble....or just having to allow them to make decisions that they may regret later. He looked at me with an understanding in his eyes that I had never seen before. I think he really understood what it must be like to be so protective and responsible for another human being. It was a pretty good moment for us.
I was out to dinner with my son last evening. There were some fairly young parents with a brand new baby. Brandon said "mom...look at that little baby...isn't she cute"? I said..."yes...she really is....see how her dad is so protective over her and how dependent she is for everything on them"? He agreed. I told him that he needs to remember this conversation when he's a dad someday, and then he'll understand how hard it is to see your children hurting....or in trouble....or just having to allow them to make decisions that they may regret later. He looked at me with an understanding in his eyes that I had never seen before. I think he really understood what it must be like to be so protective and responsible for another human being. It was a pretty good moment for us.
Actually he was initially put in with the inmates... that's the reason he is in solitary confinement now.
The final straw was when the inmates apparently inserted a fluorescent lamp in the out hole and broke it off inside.
That's going to hurt no matter how you take it out
IMO they should have left him in with everybody else.
The final straw was when the inmates apparently inserted a fluorescent lamp in the out hole and broke it off inside.
That's going to hurt no matter how you take it out
IMO they should have left him in with everybody else.
Actually he was initially put in with the inmates... that's the reason he is in solitary confinement now.
The final straw was when the inmates apparently inserted a fluorescent lamp in the out hole and broke it off inside.
That's going to hurt no matter how you take it out
IMO they should have left him in with everybody else.
The final straw was when the inmates apparently inserted a fluorescent lamp in the out hole and broke it off inside.
That's going to hurt no matter how you take it out
IMO they should have left him in with everybody else.
My poor mother was completely freaked out when she realized that even as a child, before I decided to do something, I'd parse out what the consequences of my actions might be, what the chances of actually getting caught by my mother were, and whether or not the chance and the consequences were outweighed by the results I would get from my actions . . .
I'm far more spontaneous and uninhibited now than I ever was as a child. Backwards
I'm far more spontaneous and uninhibited now than I ever was as a child. Backwards