Safety Tips - Through a Rapist's Eyes

Sweet72947

Squishy face
Joined
May 18, 2006
Messages
9,159
Likes
1
Points
38
Location
Northern Virginia
#1
These tips were obtained from talking to real rapists (so it says). This has probably been posted before, but I figure its worth posting again. Everybody stay safe!

1) The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun, braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.

2) The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women whose clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around specifically to cut clothing.

3) They also look for women on their cell phone, searching through their purse, or doing other activities while walking bec ause they are off-guard and can be easily overpowered.

4) Men are most likely to attack & rape in the early morning, between 5:00 a.m. and 8:30 a.m.

5) The number one place women are abducted from/attacked is grocery store parking lots. Number two: Are office parking lots/garages. Number three: Are public restrooms.

6) The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to an other location where they don't have to worry about getting caught.

7) Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years.

8) If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9) These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas, or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.

Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you're not worth it.

10) Several defense mechanisms he taught us are: If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell , look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: "I can't believe it is so cold out here," "we're in for a bad winter." Now you've seen their face and could identify them in a line-up; you lose appeal as a target.

11) If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell STOP or STAY BACK! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back.
Again, they are looking for an EASY target.

12) If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes), yell I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.

13) If someone grabs you, you can't beat them with strength but you can by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm (between the elbow and armpit) OR in the upper inner thigh VERY, VERY HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands - the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it - it hurts.


&nbs p;
14) After the initial hit, always GO for the GROIN. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy's parts, it is extremely painful. You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble and he's out of there.




15) When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.



16) Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts!!!




You may feel a little silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.

1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do!


2. Learned this from a tourist guide in New Orleans. If a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you....chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you, and he will go for the wallet/purse.. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!



3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won't see you, but everybody else will. This has saved lives.


4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc.) DON'T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR, LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.




a. If someone is in the car with a gun to your head DO NOT DRIVE OFF, repeat: DO NOT DRIVE OFF! Instead gun the engine and speed into anything, wrecking the car. Your Air Bag will save you. If the person is in the back seat they will get the worst of it. As soon as the car crashes bail out and run. It is better than having them find your body in a remote location.


5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot or parking garage:


A.) Be aware: look around you, look into your car, at the passenger side floor, and in the back seat.


B.) If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.


C.) Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle , and the e passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk bac k into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out.



IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)


6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot. This is especially true at NIGHT!)


7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times. And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN, preferably in a zigzag pattern!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP! It may get you raped or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well-educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked "for help" into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.
 

Zoom

Twin 2.0
Joined
Jul 11, 2005
Messages
40,739
Likes
3
Points
38
Age
41
Location
Denver, CO
#2
Great tips!

I hate rapists more than anything in this world, because they are the precise reason why I have to keep driving when I see someone supposedly broken down or needing help in some other way. 9 time out of 10 the person genuinely needs assistance, but that 10th time is what gets people on the news. I refuse to be a statistic and so I keep driving/walking.
 

Romy

Taxiderpy
Joined
Dec 2, 2006
Messages
10,233
Likes
1
Points
38
Location
Olympia, WA
#6
Rapists = worse than worm poop. Thanks for posting these tips.

One thing it doesn't talk about at all is that most women are raped/molested by people they know. This only talks about how to prevent being attacked by a stranger. Makes me glad Strider will be with me though. I don't think anyone will mess with a 100+ pounds dark colored wolfhound. :D
 

noludoru

Bored Now.
Joined
Dec 22, 2006
Messages
17,830
Likes
8
Points
38
Location
Denver, CO
#7
Thanks for posting this, Sweet... most of this is actually new info--and it makes better sense than the crap that is handed out at school!
 
Joined
Dec 20, 2003
Messages
94,266
Likes
3
Points
36
Location
Where the selas blooms
#8
Good thing to post.

Now, imagine someone trying to get into my car to wait for me . . . . remembering that Kharma's perfectly capable of laying there quietly and blending in with the tan leather seats in the dark until her prey makes that one wrong move. She learned it from Bimmer. He lays in the floorboard underneath the steering column where you can't see him until it's too late. :D

I've already seen what happens when someone confronts us on the sidewalk at night. Beautiful sight ;)
 

bubbatd

Moderator
Joined
Nov 28, 2004
Messages
64,812
Likes
1
Points
0
Age
91
#13
There have been too many elderly attacked in parking lots here .... mostly robbery . I read once that the elderly should either fake a heart attack or pretend that they are crazy ( not hard to do here! ) laughing, screaming and ranting .
 

Paige

Let it be
Joined
Jan 13, 2007
Messages
7,359
Likes
0
Points
0
#14
Someone has attempted to mug me once. I say attempted because it didn't go over to well. They broke my friend Richard's nose and I kicked the guy in the crotch with my steel toed boots.
 

MisssAshby

Richy Rich HM Twit!
Joined
Jan 16, 2006
Messages
2,978
Likes
0
Points
36
Location
Edmond, OK
#17
Heheh . . . you'd be amazed at what a deterrent even having a medium sized dog that makes noise can be!
Yep! We don't have a medium or big dog but he sounds like one. Everytime someone comes to the door and I let Brawt bark I get asked what kind of "big" dog I have. I always send him to his crate and people would probably laugh if they saw that 'big" bark was coming from such a little dog.
 

MisssAshby

Richy Rich HM Twit!
Joined
Jan 16, 2006
Messages
2,978
Likes
0
Points
36
Location
Edmond, OK
#18
I read once that the elderly should either fake a heart attack or pretend that they are crazy ( not hard to do here! ) laughing, screaming and ranting .
:hail::p

When it's late at night or already dark outside I watch out for myself but I also watch after the older folks who are alone -- they are such an easy target. I understand that sometimes you have to do things alone, but I often question why are they out after dark or late alone -- where are their kids?

My mother doesn't get around very well, but if she needs something and it's late or after dark I will drive the 30 miles to her house to do it for her. I get really mad at people who don't take care of their parents. :mad:
 

Boemy

New Member
Joined
Aug 27, 2006
Messages
2,481
Likes
0
Points
0
#19
Just FYI, these are not actually tips from rapists and some of them are wrong. Although I appreciate that you were just trying to give people helpful tips. ;) But it's important to know the inaccuracies on such an important subject.

http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/outrage/rape.htm

If rapists choose their victims based on hairstyle and length of tresses, it's news to those in law enforcement; they've never noticed this trend. Rape victims have short hair, long hair, and no hair. They're also young and old, short and tall, fat and skinny, femininely dressed or looking like they just fell off the tractor, and all points in between.

Rape is also not always about getting sex quickly. Often it's an act of rage or punishment directed at a vulnerable person for perceived injustices done to the attacker by others. Getting a woman out of her clothes quickly isn't a factor in these rapes; terrorizing her and inflicting bodily harm is.

If we take points one and two together, we're to believe rapists arm themselves with scissors for cutting overall straps (instead of just easing them off the shoulders or — heaven forbid! — undoing the fasteners) yet fail to think to equip themselves with rolls of duct tape to keep their victims subdued, preferring instead to grab hold of their hair and hang on.

According to Denver Police Sgt. John Burbach, most rapes occur in the evening hours and into early morning, ending before dawn, not "between 5 and 8:30 a.m." as claimed in the e-mail. Statistics from the U.S. Department of Justice fully support him in this claim: The DOJ says "Approximately two-thirds of rapes/sexual assaults occurred at night — 6 p.m. to 6 a.m."

As for the tidbit "The number one place women are abducted from/attacked at is grocery store parking lots. Number two is office parking lots/garages. Number three is public restrooms," Kathie Kramer, public relations coordinator at the Denver Rape Assistance and Awareness Program (RAAP) says, "Statistics in studies I've found don't support this idea about grocery stores or parking lots being especially unsafe." Location is important in a violent sexual assault, but there's nothing inherently dangerous about parking lots or public restrooms; what matters is their isolation. Areas heavily frequented by foot traffic are far less likely to be chosen by a rapist. Likewise, badly-lit, less-frequented places will be favored for this type of attack.

The e-mail claims that only 2% of rapists (one out of every fifty) carries a weapon. That figure is seriously out of whack: 1995 U.S. Department of Justice statistics show that weapons were used in 30% of all rapes, meaning the chances that your rapist will be armed is just a little less than one in three. Battling an armed attacker while unarmed yourself is rarely a wise course of action to take, and misstatements such as the 2% figure could well incite an attacked woman to thrust herself into that dynamic because she figures her chances are far better than they actually are.

"If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming." That's great advice, provided you get the right rapist. And you've no way of knowing until it's too late.

As comforting as it might be to believe there's only one sort of baddie out there and if you understand his mind you can stay safe, that just isn't the case. There is no one set of right answers, and e-mails of this ilk potentially put us at even greater risk by suggesting that there is.

Around 1980, Nicholas Groth, director of Forensic Mental Health Associates, established a typology of rapists. Groth arrived at his conclusions by distilling his observations of more than 3,000 sex offenders over the course of 25 years of practice. (Most of his patients, Groth points out, were not sexually deprived at the time they committed rape, thereby exploding that most common of rape myths: that men rape because they're unable to get sex any other way.)

In a general sense, rapists fall into three motivational types: anger, power, and sadism. In anger assaults, the rapist is getting even for "some wrong he feels has been done to him, by life, by his victim at the time. He's in a frame of rage and attacks someone sexually." The anger rape is usually unpremeditated and impulsive, but the impulse drives the rapist into excessive force: the victim is punched, choked, and kicked into submission. Most such offenders derive little pleasure from the act, says Groth, but "they want to degrade their victims, and sex is something bad, dirty, the worst thing you could do to someone. That reflects a lot of our values in society."

An anger rapist could be discouraged by a potential victim who yells at him or puts up a physical struggle, thanks to the unpremeditated nature of the attack. Because the aggressor may not yet have fully decided to pursue this course of action, resistance may well change his mind. Here, even a half-hearted attempt might prove to be all it takes to end the assault. On the other hand, the rage the attacker is feeling might well be further fed by active resistance — this could be taken as yet another instance of one more person trying to deny him something he wants.

Power rape, according to Groth, is a form of compensation, committed usually by men who feel unsure of their competence. Rape gives them a sense of mastery and control. Power rapists usually hunt for victims or seize opportunities that present themselves unbidden. A power rapist is unlikely to be discouraged by resistance because his whole self image is wrapped up in his attempt to prove mastery. A woman who chooses to fight one of these had better do a darned good job of it, because she could well end up fighting for her life.

Groth defines his third type, sadistic rape, as eroticized aggression perpetrated by those whom the very act of forcible sex excites in ways that consensual sex can't. "If the anger components of aggression are eroticized," he explains, "then you see sadistic acts, such as deliberate sexual torture, using an instrument to rape the victim." A sadistic rapist is interested in inflicting pain and lasting harm. Any countering aggression on the part of the victim could well add to the attacker's enjoyment of the experience, prompting him to further acts of depravity in an effort to provoke further resistance.
 

Dave-W

Four dogs and holding
Joined
Nov 21, 2005
Messages
87
Likes
0
Points
0
Location
Redlands, California
#20
I always figured the pepper spray worked best when it came as a surprise to the turd who gets sprayed.

When it's a surprise, dude has to wonder for at least a few seconds what is blinding him, giving you that extra few seconds to split (OR my favorite, take advantage of dude's newly blind condition and REALLY work him over good).
 

Members online

No members online now.
Top