How many dogs does it take to......

Discussion in 'Dog Jokes and Cartoons' started by megabiznes, Dec 4, 2003.

  1. megabiznes

    megabiznes New Member

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    How many dogs does it take to......
    These are the answers from dogs when asked "How many dogs does it take to put in a light bulb?"

    Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb?

    Border Collie: Just one. And I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

    Dachshund: I can't reach the stupid lamp!

    Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

    Rottweiler: Go Ahead! Make me!

    Shi-tzu: Puh-leeze, dah-ling. Let the servants. . . .

    Lab: Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Can I?

    Malamute: Let the Border collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.

    Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

    Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.

    Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.

    Hound Dog: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

    Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

    Irish Wolfhound: Can somebody else do it? I've got a hangover.

    Pointer: I see it, there it is, right there...

    Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?

    Australian Shepherd: Put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

    Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb?

    (added by Renee)

    German Shepard: I'll guard the lightbulb while you decide. Back off!

    Chow Chow: I'm with the malamute. After I take my nap, that is!

    Akita: I'm with the chow and malamute - what's for dinner?

    Jack Russell: I can reach it! I can reach it - I just KNOW I can! Another 20 jumps and it's ALL mine!!

    Fila: I'm with the Malamute, Chow and Akita. You can pet me while the border collie's busy and I'll guard you from the others while you're petting ME! Did I mention I'll be getting ALL of the attention while he's busy changing the lightbulb?
     
  2. Lynn

    Lynn Super Moderator

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    Hi megabiznes,
    That is one of the cutest dog jokes that I have heard in a while!

    Lynn
     
  3. Renee750il

    Renee750il Felurian

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    That's one of my favorites! Someone sent it to me with even MORE dogs. The last was originally a Doberman, but I think the Doberman in your version is more accurate. What was sent to me as a Doberman is more of a typical Fila - so I fixed it! The copy I got didn't have the Irish Wolfhound; an egregious oversight, so I'm adding it in my file copy. Hope you get a few more giggles from a few more dogs.

    German Shepard: I'll guard the lightbulb while you decide. Back off!

    Chow Chow: I'm with the malamute. After I take my nap, that is!

    Akita: I'm with the chow and malamute - what's for dinner?

    Jack Russell: I can reach it! I can reach it - I just KNOW I can! Another 20 jumps and it's ALL mine!!

    Fila: I'm with the Malamute, Chow and Akita. You can pet me while the border collie's busy and I'll guard you from the others while you're petting ME! Did I mention I'll be getting ALL of the attention while he's busy changing the lightbulb?
     
  4. soccerwoofer

    soccerwoofer New Member

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    LOL that was funny! :) i have to tell my friend about that one
     
  5. Rae

    Rae New Member

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    awwwww cute
     
  6. soccerwoofer

    soccerwoofer New Member

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    That's one of my favorite jokes out of all the joke here :)
     
  7. chazhound

    chazhound Alpha Dog Staff Member

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    Great additions Renee!
    I added them to the first post... one by one we will have all
    the breeds covered one day and have the full house :)

    This is one of my favorite dog jokes too Soccer...

    Chazhound
     
  8. soccerwoofer

    soccerwoofer New Member

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    Maybe we could think of some more? Let me check my book for any we missed.
     
  9. soccerwoofer

    soccerwoofer New Member

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    Um,Chazhound, you forgot an "e" in "Renee"

    okay:
    Husky,
    Brittany,
    Beagle,
    Basset,
    Komondor...?

    Okay how about

    Basset Hound: What? The lightbulb went out? That's so sad... makes me want to cry

    Komondor: What lightbulb? I don't see it!

    Beagle:Yeah, it sure did. I can smell it!
     
  10. chazhound

    chazhound Alpha Dog Staff Member

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    hmmm... I fixed it :)
    Thanks Soccer!

    I will update the list about once a week...
     
  11. soccerwoofer

    soccerwoofer New Member

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    You're welcome :)

    Okay that gives us plenty of time to come up with more!
     
  12. soccerwoofer

    soccerwoofer New Member

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    OOOO! Got one!

    Saint Bernard: Where's the lightbulb? Is it okay? What are you guys doing standing there?! WE HAVE TO SAVE THE LIGHTBULB!
     
  13. Renee750il

    Renee750il Felurian

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    Good one!
     
  14. soccerwoofer

    soccerwoofer New Member

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  15. maui

    maui New Member

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    Spotted Mutt: Now that I have delegated wiring to the Border Collie, I have precisely 12 minutes to tear apart the slipper and drop it near the Lab.
     
  16. Top Dog

    Top Dog New Member

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    thats the best og joke I have seen in a long time

    thank you for the laugh :D
     
  17. soccerwoofer

    soccerwoofer New Member

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    Good one, Maui
     
  18. gaddylovesdogs

    gaddylovesdogs no touchy

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    The ones that I have seen have the JRT saying, "I'll just pop it back in while I bounce off the walls." How very accurate! :D
     
  19. Renee750il

    Renee750il Felurian

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    Glad you resurrected this one, Gaddys! Maybe we'll get more added to the list now :D
     
  20. Gustav

    Gustav Don't encourage me..

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    Gustav Dog (GSD X Ridgeback): I'm far too smart to be changing Light Bulbs, Especially when I have 4 chapters of War and Peace to finish tonight *tut* !!
     

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