UGH *vent*

LOL lemme geuss the person who slapped her husband LOL. Yeah because you know what happened or the circumstances or ANYTHING about it except 2 words.

I was spanked often as a child. Didn't do anything to bother me, not even with my mom's first two husbands who were physically and mentally abusive. It made no impact. What actually left the impression was how much I simply couldn't depend on my mother, and the feeling of worthlessness.

Each kid is different and needs to be dealt with accordingly. Some can be reasoned with, some can't. Some need spanked, some don't. As long as the parent is willing to figure out what works for their child and their kid isn't completely intolerable, I don't judge. Mostly because I'm not a parent. And don't plan to be. But also because it's just not my place to say how others should do things like that. Like dog training, there's a million different ways to end up with an awesome dog. Depends on the individual.

Well saying it during an argument is a lot different than me hopping around the kitchen with flying fists making cheesy kung fu movie sounds (oh yeah... You have a mental picture of that yet lol)

Yes kids are Impressionable and I am glad that Hannah is growing up with two parents who love each other, say it often and laugh A LOT.

Meh, I don't get slapping either. I guess I'm just not a physically angry person. I do pinch the noses of horses that bite me, and have slapped at horse for kicking at me before (I don't do it in anger, I have just found it to be the most swift and effective method), and ONCE I spanked Sally for cornering and putting her jaws around the cat, but it was an automatic reaction and I felt terrible for it.

My husband has made me angrier than any person on earth ever has at points, but unless I was physically defending myself from him I can't imagine ever hitting him, throwing things at him, etc. That's just not how I react when I'm angry--I'm a yeller/crier.

All I'm saying is that if one of my parents went to jail for hitting my other parent, or I saw one parent raise a hand to the other, and then they threatened to "beat me" (even jokingly), I would take it seriously. Even if I knew it was a joke, I'd still wonder if they would actually hit me. If it's okay for dad to hit mom, and dad tells me HE is going to beat me, WHY wouldn't he follow through with it eventually?

There is a difference between a joke and saying something that crosses the line.

"I'm going to attack you with kisses"
"I'm going to smack your cute little bum if you don't stop"

Those are all obviously joking.

"I'm going to beat you within an inch of your life"
"I'm going to throw you across the room if you don't stop"

Those are crossing the line. Of course, that is my opinion.

Just like I'd never say either of those to my husband (along with "I'm going to rape you"), I'd never tell my child that I was going to beat them. I agree with Sillysally and Beanie on this one. I just don't think it's appropriate to tell your child. I like Sillysally's reference to Crocs- yeah, it doesn't mean you ARE abusive, but it's certainly tacky and something I don't think anyone should do.

I don't care if anyone thinks I'm crazy. I find it very inappropriate.

Then... don't do it?

THIS--Thank you!

My mom was not a spanker, yet I was not spoiled. I was not given everything I wanted, had to work for things, had to get a summer job, etc. Actually, the most spoiled one in our family is my cousin, who was regualry spanked with a wooden spoon as a kid.

My friend's boys are also pretty obnoxious, and they are spanked a LOT. If spanking authomatically leads to better behaved children, they should all be perfect little angels. I'll not say that I would never spank, but to suggest that kids that aren't spanked are spoiled brats is like saying that kids that are spanked are abused.

I'd also like to add that if people don't want others to have opinions on their parenting styles then, IDK, maybe they shouldn't post their parenting styles on a public thread that is all about people's opinions on parenting styles.....

Im normally not until you cross a line and mine crossed it. Hes even admitted he crossed a line he never should have. My kids werent even there when it happened. They only knew we got into a fight after my husband told them.

Heck he left while I was pregnant for his own issues and he has yet to get anything but a lecture and a bunch of OTHER people saying they would have beat the **** out of him.

Again, this is an online FORUM, where we can all share our opinions.

Obviously I'm not the only one who feels this way

I didn't say we couldn't? Just sharing my opinion of your opinion.

What does that have to do with anything? I'm obviously not the only one who has "threatened" a child with no ill effects, either, so that's... great??

And my opinion is that your opinion is incredibly tacky, and you must live in a world of unicorn **** to believe kids would be scared of their mother standing up for herself.

Especially since the kids weren't there to begin with.

Also since nothing was said about that event publicly or to YOU. How do you even presume to know what actually happened. Oh wait google a picture and you know all right.

Standing up for herself? LOL. Hitting someone solves every issue.

If she felt the need to stand up for herself, maybe packing her bags and going somewhere else would do the trick?

Nah, slapping your husband and going to jail is a much better plan. Oh, and then having another child with the person you felt the need to hit to "stand up" for yourself to.

But yep, I live in a world of unicorn ****. Can it be pink and sparkly please? Because I LOVE pink sparkles

I was in chat with you when you were LOL'ing about it

LMAO yes I had a child with my husband not that again you know the whole situation.

Seeing as I only made the entire situation public to a SELECT few yeah what you know isnt eventhe whole thing

The even funnier part about it is that my husband has said if ANYONE said something to our daughters like what he said to me he would be in jail LOL

Considering you told a bunch of people on here the whole story and relayed it in chat, yep, I heard plenty!

I don't believe in hitting people I love. And you must love him enough to have another child with him. If you truly felt unsafe and like you needed to stand up for yourself (like Lyzelle said), then I'm sure you wouldn't get back together with him to have another child.

Just turned back on a walk to the store/post office (which means treats usually). My son (7) asked what treat we were getting, I said we didn't really need any more sugar in the house. He asked if we could get freezies, said no, we've got some at home. Asked if we could have them when we got back, told him after supper. He whined then about not getting something else at the store, told him no, we do not go to the store to get the mail and buy junk (generally when we get there it's then a whine fest about what he's allowed to get, he wants a $3-4 bigger sugar item). So he continued to fuss and I said 'if there is any more complaining, we will go home'. Sure enough two steps later we turned and came home, he called me some names and is now in his room for the night tasting soap (not my fave thing to do but the name calling has gotten pretty annoying and constant).

On topic though as far as abuse as a kid and how it affects later in life, there's a difference between parenting and abuse. I came from a pretty abusive family, I remember a lot of crap that happened, and am glad not to put my kids through the same thing (we have no contact, if my family were to show up they'd be locked out, told to leave and police called if they refused).

actually no one that would be telling YOU or any of chaz knows the full story So unless you know our counselor you dont know the whole situation.