UGH *vent*
- Thread starter darkchild16
- Start date
It's a pretty good bet that if the parents have a sense of humor, the child will too -- or at least realize the parents do (even if it's lame, lol) and will know when the "threat" is in jest.
If parents don't have a sense of humor, though, or take themselves way too seriously, the child is going know it's not a playful warning.
It's a matter of know yourself and know your child.
Something that really impresses me is how so many of the young parents here understand that they need to adapt and meet, nurture and guide their child's personality rather than try to force mold their children's personalities into what they want.
If parents don't have a sense of humor, though, or take themselves way too seriously, the child is going know it's not a playful warning.
It's a matter of know yourself and know your child.
Something that really impresses me is how so many of the young parents here understand that they need to adapt and meet, nurture and guide their child's personality rather than try to force mold their children's personalities into what they want.
I tell my children I am going to beat their butts all the time...they KNOW its a total joke especially as I am very much anti-spanking. I chase them, grab them and then "beat" them or tickle or whatever....pretty much the exact thing I do to my dogs.
My children are both pretty rough and tumble though. We speak loud and are pretty passionate. I do have some friends children that this would NOT be a joke for, and thats ok too
My children are both pretty rough and tumble though. We speak loud and are pretty passionate. I do have some friends children that this would NOT be a joke for, and thats ok too
My friend's mom uses to tell her kids that she would "sell them to the gypsies." She said it to her then two year old son when he did something, and then forgot about it. Later on friend's mom loaded the kids in the car to head to grandma's and the son was really quiet, then suddenly burst into tears. When they asked him what was wrong he tearfully begged them not sell him to that gypsies and that he promised he would be good.
Honestly, I can't see myself even jokingly threatening physical harm to my kids. I don't even do it with my dogs-it just doesn't occur to me to. And honestly, I think that even jokingly telling anyone-husband, wife, kids in public that you are going to "beat them within an inch of their lives" is tacky--not bad parenting or anything, just tacky-like Crocs in public, lol. Then again, my parents never did that--that's just not how we roll.
Honestly, I can't see myself even jokingly threatening physical harm to my kids. I don't even do it with my dogs-it just doesn't occur to me to. And honestly, I think that even jokingly telling anyone-husband, wife, kids in public that you are going to "beat them within an inch of their lives" is tacky--not bad parenting or anything, just tacky-like Crocs in public, lol. Then again, my parents never did that--that's just not how we roll.
Want to see there is also a distinct difference between a kid knowing what you mean like when I say "beat your butt" its the start of a game and putting vague things out there they make take as real threats.
I also think if you actually DO physically hit, spank, etc the "pretend" threat may not be so funny...but guess that would depend
I also think if you actually DO physically hit, spank, etc the "pretend" threat may not be so funny...but guess that would depend
LOL! That's the difference a sense of humor makes.
When my mother told me she was going to kill us all in our sleep and then herself . . . well, I started sleeping with my door locked and made sure the dog was sleeping on MY bed.
Weirdly, looking back, it didn't occur to me just how truly insane the stuff I grew up with was. Now . . . Wow.
Oh, and when she chased me with a shovel yelling "GD you Renee, I'm going to kill you when I catch you," I took it seriously. Good thing I've always had long legs.
When my mother told me she was going to kill us all in our sleep and then herself . . . well, I started sleeping with my door locked and made sure the dog was sleeping on MY bed.
Weirdly, looking back, it didn't occur to me just how truly insane the stuff I grew up with was. Now . . . Wow.
Oh, and when she chased me with a shovel yelling "GD you Renee, I'm going to kill you when I catch you," I took it seriously. Good thing I've always had long legs.
If anyone was around to hear my husband and I joke with each other, I'm sure they would think we are awful to each other!
I really think that people need to stay out of each others parenting business unless it is completely obvious that they are seriously abusing them or neglecting them. Because our sense of humor and yours may not be the same, and along with our parenting beliefs. You may believe spanking is wrong, but I believe having a spoiled brat that gets whatever they want is wrong (though I know no one will admit to their child being like that, I see it all the time).
Just because we do things differently doesn't mean the other needs CPS on their backs. We are all going to make mistakes sure and probably screw our kids up in some way or another, but these people that call CPS on something kids say in school or stores...do they really think that the foster system is going to take better care of them than parents that threaten to spank their kids because they are throwing a fit in the middle of a store which is not acceptable behavior?
I really think that people need to stay out of each others parenting business unless it is completely obvious that they are seriously abusing them or neglecting them. Because our sense of humor and yours may not be the same, and along with our parenting beliefs. You may believe spanking is wrong, but I believe having a spoiled brat that gets whatever they want is wrong (though I know no one will admit to their child being like that, I see it all the time).
Just because we do things differently doesn't mean the other needs CPS on their backs. We are all going to make mistakes sure and probably screw our kids up in some way or another, but these people that call CPS on something kids say in school or stores...do they really think that the foster system is going to take better care of them than parents that threaten to spank their kids because they are throwing a fit in the middle of a store which is not acceptable behavior?
If anyone was around to hear my husband and I joke with each other, I'm sure they would think we are awful to each other!
I really think that people need to stay out of each others parenting business unless it is completely obvious that they are seriously abusing them or neglecting them. Because our sense of humor and yours may not be the same, and along with our parenting beliefs. You may believe spanking is wrong, but I believe having a spoiled brat that gets whatever they want is wrong (though I know no one will admit to their child being like that, I see it all the time).
Just because we do things differently doesn't mean the other needs CPS on their backs. We are all going to make mistakes sure and probably screw our kids up in some way or another, but these people that call CPS on something kids say in school or stores...do they really think that the foster system is going to take better care of them than parents that threaten to spank their kids because they are throwing a fit in the middle of a store which is not acceptable behavior?
I really think that people need to stay out of each others parenting business unless it is completely obvious that they are seriously abusing them or neglecting them. Because our sense of humor and yours may not be the same, and along with our parenting beliefs. You may believe spanking is wrong, but I believe having a spoiled brat that gets whatever they want is wrong (though I know no one will admit to their child being like that, I see it all the time).
Just because we do things differently doesn't mean the other needs CPS on their backs. We are all going to make mistakes sure and probably screw our kids up in some way or another, but these people that call CPS on something kids say in school or stores...do they really think that the foster system is going to take better care of them than parents that threaten to spank their kids because they are throwing a fit in the middle of a store which is not acceptable behavior?
FTR, Brian and I are terrible to each other lol. If someone didn't know us they would seriously question our relationship lol. We pick on each other, tease each other and are "mean" to each other lol but it is all in fun. Like I will walk up to him in the kitchen and suddenly kick my leg way up like I was going to kick him in the head or something (except I can't get my leg that high lol) and he will just laugh and be like "did you hurt yourself?". Lol... The answer is usually yes hahaha
I have spanked Hannah. Very very rarely but I have and then we talk about what led to the spanking and she is a very happy, well rounded child. She is a soft child but not in the way that things scar her for life if you talk put of turn or something. The majority of the time a simple reminder about her behaviour is enough but sOmetimes she gets a wild hair. We have a system. Verbal warnings, then we leave where ever we are, if It continues on she is informed that she must go to her room when we get home and is told that one more warning is a spank on the butt.
I completely agree!
How would you feel if you were fighting with your husband (over something that was your fault) and he said something like "I'm going to rape you." That would be equally tacky, and even said jokingly, it's just not something I'd ever want someone to say to me.
Kids really ARE impressionable.
Also, I know that that some of the people in this thread who joke about "beating" their kids actually DO have abusive tendencies.
How would you feel if you were fighting with your husband (over something that was your fault) and he said something like "I'm going to rape you." That would be equally tacky, and even said jokingly, it's just not something I'd ever want someone to say to me.
Kids really ARE impressionable.
Also, I know that that some of the people in this thread who joke about "beating" their kids actually DO have abusive tendencies.