Suspended?!?!

Wheeeee, I got ditto'd twice. Must mean I can go home early today, my work is done.

I believe the "ho" was not used as the derogatory form, at least not at first. I believe it was a play on the scene she was probably performing. I was a drama nerd in high school too and many of my scenes including phrases such as those. "Ho" in Shakespearean is basically akin to "now".

I'd be pretting effing p*ssed too if I was the only one who got suspended. You'd also be surprised and what you can get a lighter to do if you know which parts to tinker with. And unless you're a mom, I don't think most of us have eyes in the backs of our heads.

I can't really say anything about not blowing up or defending myself way out of proportion...

I'm a really level headed person but once in high school this guy came at me and kept bothering me then hit me so that my water bottle jabbed into my mouth and spilled all over me.

I didn't really think but before I knew it I had his arm and was twisting it with my nails dug into his arm and throwing a long string of curses his way until one of my guy friends pulled me off and told him to go away in a less than nice manner. When I let go, I realized that he was bleeding...

Luckily no teachers saw and he was too embarrassed a 5' 4" girl made him bleed to go report it.

I have NEVER had a fight other than then. sometimes you react poorly in the heat of the moment, but hey... you gotta defend yourself.

I would definately have done the same thing. I guess im prone to overreacting .

I don't know if this was out of porportion or not. In 7th grade, I had the misfortune to get a locker next to one of the biggest jerks/troublemakers in school. These were the types of lockers where you had two skinny ones side by side and then two square "cubbies" stacked on top. I had the top cubby, which sucked, because I'm short. Anyway, this kid would always try to make me drop my bag, slam my locker doors shut, crap like that. One day I told him that if he didn't knock it off, I was going to slit his throat with my nails and it didn't matter if he told, because who were they going to believe anyway? I was the good kid, he wasn't. I had them kind of filed into sharp edges because of this kid anyway. So he kept pushing me and I whipped around and did a cat-like swipe across his neck.

A teacher saw it happen and turned away. He went walking around with four red claw marks on the side of his neck and I never heard a single thing from any teacher. He also never bothered me again. Violence may not always be the answer, but sometimes small doses of it is. That did more than if I had gone to a teacher and whined that he was bothering me. Maybe it was overreacting, but it got the results I needed.

Speaking generally about physicality and anger,

The fact is this...even "in the heat of the moment" you make choices...those choices have consequences...sometimes severe ones, other times almost none. Deal with that...maturely. I don't see much else to say about it.

There have been news stories of these things, with kids lighting others on fire with a LIGHTER. Hair catches fire pretty fast.

I find it ironic that we will all tell people to defend their dogs from attacking dogs, yet this girl was 'attacked' and many of you get mad at her for defending herself. Its not like she slammed her into a wall and the started punching her. She just pushed her away. Its pretty hard to say what you would do unless you are there. As has been said, we are animals too and when startled you CAN physically react before you can think. I do think there person with the lighter should have been held accountable for her actions.

Dekka...I am not mad...I am not going to just go along with "just pushed her away" because of the very thing you spoke about...I wasn't there...so no account is a full one to me.

I would have no issue with her using an airhorn on this girl in the future...or a spray bottle...does that help?

Unfortunately US schools don't work like the real world. Around here, unless you are physically backed into a corner where you cannot run away, you are not allowed to "defend yourself." And even then, if you fight back, you're STILL just as likely to be suspended along with the other student.
This was always made perfectly clear to us. If you defended yourself you knew what was going to happen. Most people defended themselves anyway and didn't cry about it - a suspension is worth defending your ass. It's just high school.


And I don't think we can call it just pushing her away since the OP chose to use the words "threw her into a wall."

Hence my penalty box comments LOL!

ROFL!

Very true, and there are 2 sides. All I said is that there is an awful lot of blame the victim here (as far as we can tell, and as we only have the one side-from a chaz member-I think we could try to at least be a little suportive). And this is NOT a US school.

I sure can commiserate, at least!

To the OP,
Being susp and losing out on something you want to do because someone else starts a problem,and you get drawn in, has a very high suck factor!

Hope you feel better soon and can process, and move on a better person.

Dekka: A dog fight is a lot different than a lighter. Dog fights have teeth and nails (kind of like a chick fight!), a lighter is just a lighter. It's not going to harm anyone.

I don't know what kind of clothing ya'll are wearing but mine are cotton or synthetic fibers. It would take a long while to catch them on fire. I don't douse my body in gasoline before I got to school every day (too expensive) so the worst would be a burn mark on the back of my clothes.

And yes I know how quickly said clothes go up in flames: not very. I've burned a couple of old shirts before and they took a while.


That's the impression I got at the beginning but by the end it ended up being very spiteful.

Clothes maybe not, but again...HAIR will go up quickly. I don't know how long this girl's hair is or what she puts in it, but it doesn't take much to end up looking like Ghost Rider.

GO I said HAIR. And its happened before. Polyester goes up quickly too. This actually happened at my high school. A girl got 2nd degree burns just cause a boy was goofing around with a lighter. So you may trivialize it all you want, but it HAS happened, and people HAVE gotten hurt.

LMAO. OMG, that really made me laugh.

Seeing some previous posts by the OP, it's pretty obvious she's got a lot of problems at school, and even in this post it's clear she's pretty angry. My take is it wasn't a defensive push away from herself that ended in the lighter girl hitting the wall, but actually violently pushing lighter-girl across the stage and into the wall, with the wall being used as a weapon. I don't know, but most stages I've seen don't have walls sitting all willy nilly around. You've got a good distance to go before you get to a wall.

Your mentaly capable of logical thought. You did what you did, provoked or not. Now you must deal with the coniscences (sp?). Welcome to the world, stuff happens. You need to accept it and stop complaining

Look, I'm not going to speak for the other person, because I do not know her or the length of her hair, how far the lighter was from her, how BIG it was, or how much of "flame throwing" abilities it might have had.

BUT, I WILL say that this type of mockery is ridiculous. I seriously HOPE that NO ONE ever tries to set you on fire even jokingly, because I think it's awful and I'd HATE to have to see you eat your words when you defend yourself.


And just so you know, I happen not to have peripheral vision.

One little burn is something I would have to deal with, one tiny scar that will be there. If I'm going to get hurt I can guarantee you I'm not going down alone. My hair was burned when I was in the 7th grade and my hair was never the same. Took a while for it to grow back, and since then my hair has been very dry and britle. And thats something that I have to deal with for the rest of my life. Now the a-hole who decided it will be funny to burn my hair off, will probably have to wonder whether or not he will be able to ever have kids .

Rigged lighters can be very dangerous, the flame is equivelent to a torch. I hate how "popular" kids think they can get away with ANYTHING, and need to be put in their place at times. In my world if you try a stunt like that your going to get you ass whipped. If you dont get the first hit, your done. And these people are ignorant enough to pour gas, liquor ect on you and burn you. Now I will NOT allow a situation to get that far, EVER. I will defend myself and will deal with the consequences later, rather be safe sitting in a court room than being torched alive,