Why do people just get a dog and expect too much out of them?

[JacksonsMom]

And by people, I mean my grandma.

I posted a while ago about how her beloved Lab died at age 10 of cancer. She was super easy in her last few years - they let her get overweight, never walked her, she was content to be in the house all day and just go in the yard.

Well, she dies, grandma decides she wants a puppy. Decides on a white boxer puppy from nextdaypets in PA. Thank goodness I talked her out of that, along with a few others who warned her of the health problems white boxers can have.

So she goes to the SPCA on a Saturday and picks out a 1 year old female foxhound mix (35ish lbs). Dog is very laid back and calm. For the first few days. Now, she's like any other 1 year old dog who needs training and exercise. She attached herself VERY much so to my grandma's husband. So when he's not home, my grandma can't get her to listen to her.

Well, this morning, she had to go and leave for work. Addie was under the deck and she couldn't get her to come back inside. Had to go to work, so she just left her outside in the fenced in yard. She's getting very frustrated with her... but I simply don't understand WHY anyone would expect a dog, who had been found roaming the streets, would automatically know and understand the English language, automatically learn their living habits, and be just like their old dog?

It's just so frustrating to me that my own family, who are all dog LOVERS, would learn that a dog needs more than to sit in a house all day. For Addie, in particular, an hour long walk per day would probably suffice. 10 minutes of training every night maybe. She has awesome walking trails near her house. Take the dog for a walk. Yes my grandma works full-time so she's not home alot, so Addie stays in the crate during the day, all the more reason to give her a walk in the morning, or even a trip to the dog park on a weekend, or just *something*.

Also, note, when I say "grandma" ... my grandma is not like old, gray haired, lady. She's a young 65, lol, and most would think she's my mother.

It's just so frustrating. Because the dog is going to get blamed, or the fact that she adopted from the shelter, or whatever. Her husband is going away in a couple weeks for 5 nights and she is putting Addie in the boarding kennel, because she says she can't handle her by herself, she won't come back in the house for her, etc, etc...

So anyways I text my grandma and said "You want me to put Addie in my bootcamp? LOL. I hear your a little frustrated with her. I know you don't have the time, but I can help you train her." So she said "Yes! yes! yes!" So hopefully I can work with her a bit, but my grandma is going to have to put in the effort too.

 

[BekahAura]

Well aside from suggesting the bootcamp, did you make these other suggestions to your grandma? I know you are getting it all out here, but maybe grandma needs to know exactly what you think!

She's lucky she has you to whip her into shape (even if she doesn't realize it yet).

 

[Emily]

Hey, I'm glad she accepted your offer at least!

If I have to listen to my boss yell at a dog one more time for peeing in the lobby... Um, if you're going to keep a 3 lb Chi in the lobby with you, you'd better take her out every few hours. Her bladder is like a peanut, and she has no previous concept of housebreaking... what do you expect?! Gah.

 

[Beanie]

I think sometimes people just seem to forget that a new dog is sort of like bringing home a new baby, and you have to TEACH the dog stuff. I can't tell you how many times I've had to tell my dad "He doesn't know that yet" with Payton. At one point I even told him "You might as well be speaking French." THE DOG DOESN'T UNDERSTAND.
It's really frustrating to say the least, especially because then my dad starts getting mad and yelling at the dogs. My dogs don't care about being yelled at, but I care that they're being yelled at, especially for something they don't understand... like you couldn't ask me to do a triple backflip and then yell at me when I stand there staring at you blankly...

Honestly sometimes I'm amazed he ever had children around. Then I remember my childhood and it makes sense again.

I'm so desperate to move out I can't even explain.

 

[Maxy24]

I feel your pain, especially people thinking animals will just understand you, especially if you yell loud enough. Sometimes when you eat Tucker comes up and puts his paws on your leg, people will literally stare at him shouting "get down!" like 10 times and think at some point he'll suddenly know what they mean if they just keep screaming. It's incredibly annoying to have people shouting repeatedly while I'm eating and all they have to do is gently push him off and he doesn't come back.


My parents were also the same way about energy. They expected Tucker to behave like our ten year old dog did (who was on a bad diet and didn't get any exercise for the vast majority of his life). I swear people just want stuffed animals, come cuddle and play every once in a while, otherwise go lay on the bed and be quiet. I just didn't understand, my parents loved having kids, bringing us to all of their sports games/practices and doing fun activities with us, but they don't like to walk, train, bring the dog to the park, play with him, anything. I figured they'd like doing things with him like they did with us, it just doesn't make sense to me.


I hope you can help Addie out, but if you're grandma isn't willing to at least reward her for following commands you teach her then I doubt she'll ever listen to her. Maybe buy her some treats she carry in her pocket or keep in a dish on a table or something so she can easily reward her for coming when she's called.

 

[Red.Apricot]

This sort of thing bothers me, too, especially people with 8-10 week old puppies that flip out because the puppy is 'aggressive' and bites... their hands... during play.

Elsie does a lot of head tilts at people, too--they tell her to 'sit down,' which she can't do (because it's two things--she often just sort of crouches at them) or to 'get down' from the sofa, which confuses her because she's already laying on it.

 

[Emily]

This sort of thing bothers me, too, especially people with 8-10 week old puppies that flip out because the puppy is 'aggressive' and bites... their hands... during play.

Elsie does a lot of head tilts at people, too--they tell her to 'sit down,' which she can't do (because it's two things--she often just sort of crouches at them) or to 'get down' from the sofa, which confuses her because she's already laying on it.

My OB class just "graduated" last night, and one of the handlers had a shining moment when his 6 mo old Golden tried to jump on him. He said, "Bear, DOWN!" Then stopped instantly, looked at me, and said, "oh... ****... I mean, Bear, OFF." LOL! He knew exactly what he did wrong. Good boy.

 

[Beanie]

My OB class just "graduated" last night, and one of the handlers had a shining moment when his 6 mo old Golden tried to jump on him. He said, "Bear, DOWN!" Then stopped instantly, looked at me, and said, "oh... ****... I mean, Bear, OFF." LOL! He knew exactly what he did wrong. Good boy.

Sometimes I want to click-treat my students, LOL.

 

[Hillside]

My OB class just "graduated" last night, and one of the handlers had a shining moment when his 6 mo old Golden tried to jump on him. He said, "Bear, DOWN!" Then stopped instantly, looked at me, and said, "oh... ****... I mean, Bear, OFF." LOL! He knew exactly what he did wrong. Good boy.

This is why I teach "drop" or "platz" instead of down. :rofl1:

 

[JacksonsMom]

Well aside from suggesting the bootcamp, did you make these other suggestions to your grandma? I know you are getting it all out here, but maybe grandma needs to know exactly what you think!

She's lucky she has you to whip her into shape (even if she doesn't realize it yet).

By bootcamp, I meant myself by the way, lol. Just thought I'd throw that out there. I really like clicker training so plan on showing her how easy it is.

My grandma is spending the night at our house Wed. night (without Addie) so I may show her how I teach Jackson and give her a clicker.

It's just funny to me because when she first adopted her, she was all into it, said she was going to enroll in a training class, go for walks, etc, and it's been weeks and none of those things have been done.

 

[JacksonsMom]

I think sometimes people just seem to forget that a new dog is sort of like bringing home a new baby, and you have to TEACH the dog stuff. I can't tell you how many times I've had to tell my dad "He doesn't know that yet" with Payton. At one point I even told him "You might as well be speaking French." THE DOG DOESN'T UNDERSTAND.
It's really frustrating to say the least, especially because then my dad starts getting mad and yelling at the dogs. My dogs don't care about being yelled at, but I care that they're being yelled at, especially for something they don't understand... like you couldn't ask me to do a triple backflip and then yell at me when I stand there staring at you blankly...

Honestly sometimes I'm amazed he ever had children around. Then I remember my childhood and it makes sense again.

I'm so desperate to move out I can't even explain.

LOL - my dad is sort of like that. Except not AS bad.

But their JRT mix Lilly goes to the bathroom in the house almost every day. Then he yells at her and says she's a stupid dog.

Then he'll just let out in the backyard, she ends up staring at the door and not even going in the backyard, comes in, and goes potty. Process starts again.

I tried to explain to him that if he simply WALKED out there with her, watched her go, praised her for doing it, she'd be fine. He and my stepmom are just too lazy.

 

[JacksonsMom]

My parents were also the same way about energy. They expected Tucker to behave like our ten year old dog did (who was on a bad diet and didn't get any exercise for the vast majority of his life). I swear people just want stuffed animals, come cuddle and play every once in a while, otherwise go lay on the bed and be quiet. I just didn't understand, my parents loved having kids, bringing us to all of their sports games/practices and doing fun activities with us, but they don't like to walk, train, bring the dog to the park, play with him, anything. I figured they'd like doing things with him like they did with us, it just doesn't make sense to me.

Yup. My dads brother and his wife did this. Their Lab died and they got a silky/yorkie from the pet store. This dog did not just stay around the unfenced yard like their Lab did, was a bit hyper, needed training, like ANY 10 week old puppy... so she gave the dog to her sister. "Oh he was way too much work". A month later, they go and get a GSD mix pup.

 

[Southpaw]

My aunt is super bad about this. In the 2.5 years that I've had Juno, my aunt has went through FOUR dogs and has not kept any of them. All puppies. All given away because they're "too much work." Well good God woman, STOP GETTING PUPPIES THEN!!!!!
(And to make matters worse, every single time the puppy would be some glorified mix from a BYB).

The last time she did this, she REALLY lost her mind and got not just one, but TWO puppies. :doh: Like, there was not a shred of common sense involved in that decision lol. And she sent them down to her mom in Texas, who was supposed to keep and train them for 6 months, and then my aunt would take them back. Well (luckily) her mom got really attached to the dogs and so she never took them back... but seriously, get a mellow, already trained adult dog or a stuffed animal if you have no desire to do the puppy thing.


I do in some ways understand being frustrated when the new dog is not like the old dog. Juno used to get compared to Molly A LOT (she still kind of does), I was always commenting on how "Molly never acted like that" or "Molly could do behavior XYZ at that age." I was used to having the perfect, easy dog. Totally spun my world upside down to have Juno. And while I KNEW it was possible, and likely, that she would be a hellion and would not automatically be as awesome as Molly was.... I still was not prepared and didn't really want to deal with it. But, obviously I did, didn't really have a choice otherwise, I agreed to a puppy!