Tough Situation- Any help on this difficult scenario?

[dem372]

Hello. New to the board, and any advice on this situation would be appreciated.

I am the parent of a 3 year old and an 11 month old (crawling, just learning to walk, etc...).

My parents, who live about 2 hours away, own an english setter that they rescued from the pound. This is a large dog. For the most part, the dog is a good dog. He is friendly with visitors, very loving with my parents, and is well behaved. The problem is, he has shown some aggresion in the past towards my three year old. Nothing too bad, but he has growled at her while he was resting and she came near him, and this past Christmas he snapped at her when she came near him while he was chewing his new bone.

I have always been very cautious about letting my kids near big dogs, and always was insistent that my parents keep a very close eye on the kids and the dog when they were babysitting. After the snapping incident at Christmas I decided that that was all the warning I needed and said I do not want my kids to be around the dog at all.

My mother thinks I am being irrational and overly protective. She feels the dog would never do anything to hurt the child and that I am paranoid. And also, she says she always watches the kids very closely and would not allow anything to happen, even if it were a danger. I feel that its just too tough to keep a constant eye on a toddler, a crawling baby, and a dog, and it only takes a second for something bad to happen.

So, I do not know what to do. I don't want to make my parents think I dont trust them, but all of my instincts tell me to keep the kids away from the dog. But my toddler loves spending the night at Grandma's and I do not want to this to keep her from doing things like that.

Does anyone have any advice on this? Am I being too paranoid? I just want to be sure I am doing the right thing. Thank you.

 

[Gempress]

You're not too paranoid, you're right. That dog is not trustworthy around your children. Growling/snapping are early indicators that the dog is prepared to bite. And it really does take only a split-second for your child to get a bite to the face. Encourage your parents to get the dog some training.

If your parents still think you're paranoid, show them this post. There are many dog lovers/trainers on this board, and I'm pretty sure all of them would agree with you.

 

[casablanca1]

My mother thinks I am being irrational and overly protective. She feels the dog would never do anything to hurt the child and that I am paranoid. And also, she says she always watches the kids very closely and would not allow anything to happen, even if it were a danger. I feel that its just too tough to keep a constant eye on a toddler, a crawling baby, and a dog, and it only takes a second for something bad to happen.

You're kind of in a no-win situation. Your mom is defending her pet and defending her abilities as a grandmother to protect your children. I think your instincts are good. The dog probably isn't used to kids, and obviously will 'protect' his stuff. If you'd really like your toddler to have her sleepovers with her grandparents, you could suggest swapping 'kids' for a weekend, and you take the dog while your children stay with your parents.

 

[Calamity Kate]

If your parents will not absolutely promise to keep the dog SHUT SOMEWHERE THAT YOUR CHILDREN CANNOT GET TO, then your children should not be visting. Simple as. Accidents happen in the blink of an eye - even if the dog and children are closely supervised, it would be extremely lucky if, in the event of an incident, someone could intervene quickly enough.

Sorry to be blunt, but your parents, especially your mother, need a sharp reality check. This sort of thing makes me cross. I am a dog lover but children come first, ALWAYS.

 

[mojozen]

the dog needs to be crated when the children around if the grandparents will not address the situation at hand with more training, more socialiazation with a qualified behaviorist/trainer. This is not something they should do on their own.

My own dog, while friendly with kids, is crated if there aren't enough responsible adults around to keep watch on everyone. Either that or he's leashed to me, and the kids are not allowed to interact with him. It's more for his safety than their's since my neice and nephews are little hellions and do not treat animals correctly. (i have seen them hit, kick, and punch my dog without the parents giving much corrective reaction )

Kids and dogs aren't always a good mix. You really have to work with both to make sure they are okay -- because not all dogs just instinctively LIKE kids. Do they know anything about his past prior to coming to him? One reason he may have been given up is because he's not a "little kid friendly" dog.

He needs training, more socialization, and careful watch. If they aren't willing to do this, either grandma and grandpa come to visit you or the dog should be crated when the kids are around.

 

[B33CPE]

You arent being irrational, the dog shouldnt be around your kids. Your parents should lock the dog up when the kids are over, like in the garage, a bedroom, crate, kennel etc. I belive that a problem like this can only be fixed if the dog see a professional trainer/behavorialist, even then it cant always be fixed.

 

[RedyreRottweilers]

The dog is not trustworthy.

An overnight stay is not worth the possibility of a dog bite injury.

Maybe Grandma can come visit overnight with you from time to time.