The Venting Thread

[*blackrose]

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this again, especially when Michael is on deployment.

I may have said this before, but sometimes you just have to let others make their own decisions rather than letting them drag you down, too, as hard as it is.

Right. Helping is one thing, enabling/being responsible for someone else's life is another thing. Good luck, this sucks.

Ugh, I know. What she's asking for isn't unfeasible, but it is just another road block that we'll have to recover from, and I'm sick and tired of constantly treading water and not moving forward with our finances. We have no debt outside of the car, but to keep it that way our savings is not as it should be.

With this deployment I was hoping we'd finally be able to move forwards and actually have an ample savings account. I'd finally be able to get my piano, we'd have money to replace/rebuild our computers, and we'd be more financially stable for when we have a child (as we'll be TTC later this year). I had even got my hopes up that maybe, just maybe, we'd even be able to swing the cost for me to fly out and see him in Spain early this summer.

Ha. Haha. Nope. Just kidding.

I told Michael that. Once he's back at home and has living expenses again, we wouldn't be able to provide financial support to her. While he's gone, I said we could probably swing it - there just won't be any of the things we were planning to do with the money aside from having some set aside in savings for when we have a child.

And then I feel horrible for choosing objects (no matter how dearly wanted and long awaited for) over helping his mother....which makes me even more pissed off.

*sigh*

 

[meepitsmeagan]

I'm yelled at as soon as I get home from school.
I'm yelled at for saying anything.
I'm yelled at for wanting to relax for just a bit.
I'm yelled at for getting emotional.
I'm yelled at for making any facial expression of any kind.
I'm yelled at for having an opinion.
It seems I'm just there to be yelled at.

Kind of sick of it. Can't wait until I can move out because it WILL happen as soon as possible. This environment is toxic and ridiculous. Calling me names and lowering my self esteem and having me fear you is not equivalent to respect or discipline. How do you expect me to respect you when you have never respected me? You earn respect, don't take it for granted that I'm a good child.

I'm really sorry. I lived that life for a long time and it eventually escalated to full out rage ending in physical abuse. If you ever need to talk, my inbox is open.

 

[joce]

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
frustrated right now. I really want to punch a wall. Or cry. Or both.

More issues with Michael's mother. We get to choose whether to throw his mom under the bus, or screw up our savings/finances. HOORAY.

I love my life. Not.

Ummm. You do not make that choice. She is an adult. If I am remembering right she is ill and likely doing this on purpose.

Let her sink. You are looking at this all wrong. Give her resources like food banks and shelters and places to apply for work but do not EVER give family money. Do not let her stay with you. Draw a line now. Go ahead and be the bad person now, someone has to be eventually.

 

[stardogs]

Ummm. You do not make that choice. She is an adult. If I am remembering right she is ill and likely doing this on purpose.

Let her sink. You are looking at this all wrong. Give her resources like food banks and shelters and places to apply for work but do not EVER give family money. Do not let her stay with you. Draw a line now. Go ahead and be the bad person now, someone has to be eventually.

^That. We helped out DH's mom with a loan once and we both drew our line there. We WILL NOT be helping her monetarily further, though, like you, we could if we sacrificed. DH *does* provide some financial advice and does check in weekly to keep her going along the right path now that she's showing interest in it and we have looked up legal services, etc. for her as well, but the money tree is not available.

 

[JazzyTheSibe]

I'm yelled at as soon as I get home from school.
I'm yelled at for saying anything.
I'm yelled at for wanting to relax for just a bit.
I'm yelled at for getting emotional.
I'm yelled at for making any facial expression of any kind.
I'm yelled at for having an opinion.
It seems I'm just there to be yelled at.

Kind of sick of it. Can't wait until I can move out because it WILL happen as soon as possible. This environment is toxic and ridiculous. Calling me names and lowering my self esteem and having me fear you is not equivalent to respect or discipline. How do you expect me to respect you when you have never respected me? You earn respect, don't take it for granted that I'm a good child.

Oh no. I'm really sorry your going through this. *HUGS* Feel free to PM me anytime.

Could you possibly talk to someone about this?

Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
frustrated right now. I really want to punch a wall. Or cry. Or both.

More issues with Michael's mother. We get to choose whether to throw his mom under the bus, or screw up our savings/finances. HOORAY.

I love my life. Not.

******HUGS******* to you. Sorry to hear that you need to experience this again, especially since Michael is gone. Sending vibes your way,& I really hope that things will start to get better for you.


~~~~~

I'm hoping to make the accomplishment of getting my Drivers License , by the end of 2015. I really don't want to rely on others for getting me places, because I can't. The thing is, is that I have a (irrational) fear of driving, & that is preventing me from actually obtaining my license. It isn't that I'm worried about myself, I'm more worried about hurting others, damaging the car, or someone else's property.

Stupid

 

[DJEtzel]

I have a connective tissue disorder so I dislocate easily. I dislocated my wrist a bit and have it wrapped, and it's fine. But now I'm going to have to explain to people why I'm wearing a bandage. Ugh.

I tore all of the tendons attaching my clavicle to my shoulder blade about a week and a half ago. I was in a sling for two days, and it was awful. As soon as my ortho Dr. told me I could take it off if I wanted I was in heaven.

So sorry! I hated all the looks and questions... and not being able to use my hand/making excuses for things.

 

[CrystalGSD]

I'm really sorry. I lived that life for a long time and it eventually escalated to full out rage ending in physical abuse. If you ever need to talk, my inbox is open.

Thanks. I'm sorry that you had to go through something similar but I'm glad you got out.

Oh no. I'm really sorry your going through this. *HUGS* Feel free to PM me anytime.

Could you possibly talk to someone about this?

Thanks. Honestly I'm scared the counselor or whoever I talk to will realize how bad my situation is and like send me and my little siter to foster care or live with my older brother or something. Idk I'm just irrationally frightened of telling anyone.

 

[Bruschnazzy]

Thanks. Honestly I'm scared the counselor or whoever I talk to will realize how bad my situation is and like send me and my little siter to foster care or live with my older brother or something. Idk I'm just irrationally frightened of telling anyone.

There are a lot of great online anonymous options for talking to people for the time being, too. Many people on Tumblr who run advice / support blogs are in school towards or trained for speaking / helping people in many situations or there are websites like https://www.7cupsoftea.com/. I've never done the 7cupsoftea option as I seemed to be on at a time where, like, no listeners were on, so was a bit of a waiting list, but I've spoke to some really great and helpful people on Tumblr. Your sitation sounds a lot like mine has been growing up, so. I never wanted to tell anyone because of guilt and worrying of being rejected by the rest of my family (though I never would be - but I overworry about things sometimes), so I used the option of talking to people no where near me I don't know, and still do sometimes! They might not be going to a licensed building in person like one would expect of you, but many have helped a lot and became friends and I have enjoyed meeting people through personal issues.

 

[sparks19]

I'm amazed at how many people think care of the baby teeth and decay in the baby teeth doesn't matter because they are going to fall out anyway!

One lady was surprised that her daughter (4 years old) had at least 4 cavities but says she only brushes her teeth at night and then wasn't going to bother getting them filled unless they started to cause pain. Hannah didn't lose her first tooth until she was 7 years old... that's a possible 3 or more years until the FIRST tooth is lost and then how ever long until they lose all those teeth. that's a long time to go with a bunch of cavities and improper dental care.

 

[amberdyan]

I'm amazed at how many people think care of the baby teeth and decay in the baby teeth doesn't matter because they are going to fall out anyway!

One lady was surprised that her daughter (4 years old) had at least 4 cavities but says she only brushes her teeth at night and then wasn't going to bother getting them filled unless they started to cause pain. Hannah didn't lose her first tooth until she was 7 years old... that's a possible 3 or more years until the FIRST tooth is lost and then how ever long until they lose all those teeth. that's a long time to go with a bunch of cavities and improper dental care.

I agree! I had a coworker do something similar. Not only is that a long time to go with cavities, it's a long time to solidify incorrect hygiene practices.

 

[Melle]

It's been a couple months and I already don't want this job anymore.

I'm sick of being a good employee who's job or termination depends on meeting some conversion rate quota, having to go through the same spiel all day trying to convince people who don't want the dang card but being at stake because of it. It doesn't matter how much I sell - it depends on how many customers. Our head cashier is letting anyone under the magic percentage know before we get "the talk."

I really liked it at first but now it just feels like how school did - trying really hard and still having to fear the numbers. If I had another job lined up I'd dip now because I really don't like it.

 

[ThoseWordsAtBest]

Bleh. My ex and I are definitely going to have a dog custody battle, which I was hoping to avoid.

 

[Locke]

It's been a couple months and I already don't want this job anymore.

I'm sick of being a good employee who's job or termination depends on meeting some conversion rate quota, having to go through the same spiel all day trying to convince people who don't want the dang card but being at stake because of it. It doesn't matter how much I sell - it depends on how many customers. Our head cashier is letting anyone under the magic percentage know before we get "the talk."

I really liked it at first but now it just feels like how school did - trying really hard and still having to fear the numbers. If I had another job lined up I'd dip now because I really don't like it.

That's corporate bullshit for you. Start looking for a new job now. Try to find an independently owned place or something. I just left my job because of how ridiculous corporate was.

Bleh. My ex and I are definitely going to have a dog custody battle, which I was hoping to avoid.

That sucks big time

 

[Melle]

That's corporate bullshit for you. Start looking for a new job now. Try to find an independently owned place or something. I just left my job because of how ridiculous corporate was.

Basically my plan. I mean, it's not something I would be sticking with anyway (and I was hired under the premise of part-time seasonal) but ugh! Plus my coworkers and the actual workplace are pretty decent. But the whole membership push is unpleasant for both my customers and I because I know a lot of the time it's pointless to ask and most of them don't want to be asked but we HAVE to ask at least 5 questions as we ring up their stuff. This is what happens when bookstore chains go into descent. Bleh.

I wouldn't mind being let go if I had my next job lined up and I might? but I don't know. I'm meeting with a groomer at a dog daycare to learn what I can and I get to watch and ask questions (a connection through a high school friendship of my sister's), and they're both willing to put in a word for me at PetSmart if I want to reapply there (they never call anyone back though it would seem), but first I figure I should keep meeting and establishing a relationship. I just hate the feeling of the impending push-out in the corporation's struggle for life before I'm ready xP

 

[ThoseWordsAtBest]

It really sucks because he doesn't deserve them. I'm moving out in the next week or two and I know that's when things are going to get bad. He's legally entitled to ownership of Jack and Magpie, and I was ready to go through with that and just do visitations but in the last two weeks he's completely ****ed off and neglected all the dogs. We agreed to communicate when we would be home for the dogs, and all I ask is if he's going somewhere to tell me when he left and when/if he's coming home. I have two jobs, he has zero. And no obligations. One night he opted not to respond to me at all and I came home to find they had been alone for 10 hours, which is extra bullshit when we have a rotation system and EXTRA, EXTRA bullshit when I can arrange to have my brother care for them in the event I have a long day. The other times he just flat out lies to me about when/if he's home like I don't find out every thing.

Of course this resulted in a huge fight and he went on a long diatribe about how he loves the dogs and I can't keep them from him because we broke up. No, I'm keeping them from him because they deserve to be taken care of. They mean every thing to me and I would think he of all people would know that.

 

[Dogdragoness]

I agree! I had a coworker do something similar. Not only is that a long time to go with cavities, it's a long time to solidify incorrect hygiene practices.

Ugh that's gross! I am lucky my mother instilled good dental hygiene practice in me, as a result I have never had to have a filling or a cavity.

Poor kid, that sucks.

 

[StillandSilent]

Due to working crazy weekend hours, I only work Thursday through Sunday. Saturday, I smacked my head on a dog crate and had to go to urgent care for a tetanus booster. Monday, I woke up sick as a dog. So sick that I couldn't even make it to the loft bed, so we all retreated to the futon for 3 days. Yesterday it was bad, but not as bad. My fever still went way up at night, but I was about 50% better during the day. Today I seem to be holding steady and the congestion is breaking up, with just some unattractive hacking and a drippy nose.

So guess what showed up? That's right, my period. Yeah for bodily function bingo!

On the braggy side, though, the little men have been troopers. They have only seen sunlight 6 times in three days, and only long enough to potty, and they haven't killed me yet. The cat on the other hand...

 

[teacuptiger]

That feeling like you're drowning because you're so plugged up.

I am so beyond tired of this feeling. I'm not even sick. I've just felt like this since we moved and it gets worse. I thought that once we got the flooding fixed it would end... But idk now. Allergy medication only helps a little.

I miss breathing through my nose. And not having panic attacks when it gets harder to breathe. And not being tired all the time because of the medication.

 

[CrystalGSD]

There are a lot of great online anonymous options for talking to people for the time being, too. Many people on Tumblr who run advice / support blogs are in school towards or trained for speaking / helping people in many situations or there are websites like https://www.7cupsoftea.com/. I've never done the 7cupsoftea option as I seemed to be on at a ttime where, like, no listeners were on, so was a bit of a waiting list, but I've spoke to some really great and helpful people on Tumblr. Your sitation sounds a lot like mine has been growing up, so. I never wanted to tell anyone because of guilt and worrying of being rejected by the rest of my family (though I never would be - but I overworry about things sometimes), so I used the option of talking to people no where near me I don't know, and still do sometimes! They might not be going to a licensed building in person like one would expect of you, but many have helped a lot and became friends and I have enjoyed meeting people through personal issues.

Thanks a bunch for the advice

 

[SpringerLover]

I have to start buying dog food again soon. This is distressing because while I will now make the same amount of money per month I won't be getting any free food.

Adulting is hard.