Auggie. Auggie is the first dog that has ever been mine. I call him my heart dog, but I admit I was worried when I brought Payton home that I would find out Auggie wasn't really my heart dog - just my first dog. Well, I was right, Auggie is my heart dog. I love him more than I can put into words, in a way I just can't describe. I can't even explain to you why. How lucky am I to have the first dog who is actually mine also be a heart dog? He is not perfect, but he is perfect for me. He is a little snot, stubborn sometimes (we often have times where I remind him that I am remarkably stubborn too and am in fact more stubborn than he is, though sometimes I question that...), he is too clever for is own good. Nothing makes Auggie happier than running and playing though he is okay with lazing around... but I know he is his happiest when he gets to play hard. He is hilarious and makes everybody laugh. He's a ham for sure. He is brave and a great big brother. Things haven't exactly shaken down the way I dreamed for us but I don't know that I would really change much of anything. He has taught me so much about who I am and who I can be. We have both had a lot of stumbles along the way together, but in the end we are together. People have said some not pleasant things about Auggie but it doesn't matter, because when the day is done, I get the greatest gift. I get to go home with my Auggie.
There will never be another Auggie in my life. I may have other heart dogs but there will just never be another Auggie, no matter what. He is everything. And it gives me great pleasure to know without a doubt that he does indeed mean what I thought he meant to me, even in the face of other trouble making, funny, cute little dogs.
Payton. I'm so glad I named him after Walter Payton because Sweetness he definitely is. He doesn't really stop moving - ever - and he doesn't know how to walk from point a to point b, he's always on one speed, GO. But that is exactly what I wanted. He is not quite as quick as Auggie as far as training goes but Auggie and I have been at it for so long that Auggie and I understand each other. I think Payton's quickness will come with time, because he IS an incredibly fast learner and very smart. He loves everybody in the world, loves to play with me, loves to play with Auggie. He isn't a ball hound the way Auggie is but he LOVES to tug. He was my "impulse buy" so to speak... a breeder I knew of had puppies and Auggie's breeder told me she had seen them and one looked just like Auggie's dad. I was waiting on a puppy out of Auggie's brother but when the puppies were born there were only girls. We ended up asking the other breeder about this boy, we drove up to see him, and I brought him home. Normally I am the type of person to overthink and talk myself out of things but this time I decided "to hell with it" and brought home a new puppy. And I'm so glad I did. He is also the best brother imaginable for Auggie. They are just delighted with each other.
And finally...
I met Pepper when she was a puppy. And I liked her, oh I liked her. And as things happened, after a few years, Auggie's breeder offered for me to bring her home and play with her. She HATED Auggie and she HATED my dad and it was a disaster the first weekend she came to visit. She was jealous of Auggie and Auggie became slowly depressed because she was wedging herself in whenever he would come near me. I took her back (she was only there for the weekend anyway) but I couldn't really stop thinking about her. A while later Auggie's breeder offered me to bring her home again. I told myself "Two weeks. She has two weeks to learn to play with Auggie." The first few days were HORRIBLE... she was a ball of nerves, she still hated my dad, she wanted nothing to do with Auggie, she was exhausting in a really bad way. At the end of two weeks I asked my mom what to do. "I said two weeks," I told her. She told me that Pepper had been making SOME progress, even though she still wasn't playing with Auggie, so we should keep her one more week. Then we kept her another week. Then another, then another. She was still exhausting, she still hated my dad, but she did finally play with me and with Auggie. I spent a lot of time crying and trying to decide what to do because she is not the kind of dog I like at all. She is almost Auggie's exact opposite and she kind of drives me crazy. But I loved her. I loved her so much that one afternoon I took her to work with me to try and socialize her with my co-workers, and one co-worker came around the corner with a trash bag inflated full of air. She startled a little bit and he thought it was funny so he started shaking the bag at her. I almost flew across the room and punched him in the face for daring to torment my poor little dog. But I just kept putting off making a decision. She was here to play and we would just make our best of the time we had together.
Until one weekend, at our local trial, I brought Pepper with me so she could be around the noises and smells of an agility trial. I got her out of her crate to walk her around. Auggie's breeder said to me, "She looks really happy."
"**** it," I thought. It was that exact moment that I knew Pepper wasn't going anywhere. There was no longer a time limit on how long Pepper would be living with me. We were stuck together.
That is, until my dad had enough of her being terrified of him. So for now she is back with Auggie's breeder and I drive out there to see her and work her when I can. When I am standing in the yard and the door opens and she comes out into the yard, I just call her name once and she barrels across the yard to me at top speed with a look of sheer joy on her face, and I catch her when she runs to me. And I know that she is my dog. I don't exactly know how or why it happened but she just is. And I may never get to run her in an agility ring or put her on sheep or put any kind of title on her, not even the mock title of CGC, but she is forever part of my family one way or another. I just have to get my own place and she will come back and be a physical part of it.