Basically this is taught during training sessions. You are doing it in " fun" time. Yes... any Golden will go after a toy you've thrown , but having them bring it back is another story . When in a working session.. you'll be taught to have your dog " Stay " at your side as someone else tosses their retrieve. When it lands, you release your dog to " fetch " ... return it to you at a sit...( when you call " come " ) at which you ask for the " release" snd then put your dog back to " heel " position. Basic obedience can help you with this , if you do it a home, but don't confuse the dog. I personally don't like tug of war with goldens unless it's with another dog. They basically have very soft mouths and to me it only adds to aggression ( which isn't in their makeup ) Sorry ... I bred a bunch of whoosies ....