Reggin? Tosca's Mom???
- Thread starter lilprairiemutt
- Start date
I haven't been a member of this forum for very long. I was also gone for awhile which had nothing to do with any of the activity that goes on here. I came back this month to find out that many of the people that I enjoyed hearing from had gone - that was very dissappointing to say the least.
As a newer member to Chaz, though, I hope you take my thoughts to heart. Because, I believe, new members are as vital to a forum as the moderators and older members that have given life to the forum. Without the constant influx of new blood, a forum will eventually become stale and die out.
I came to Chaz for help. I bought a puppy and was having trouble and I, thankfully, found this forum. Fortunately, for me and the pup, I found that help. Unfortunately, many of the members that gave me the help are now gone. What differentiates these "special" people is that they gave me help in a completely non judgemental way. I was ignorant, I admit, but it seemed their goal was to educate me, not judge me and make me feel bad for the mistakes that I had made. This should be the goal. Not to chase inquiring people away because you frown upon their philosophies, pilosophies, mind you, that they may not even be aware they have - yet.
Many of us that seek Chaz out are like newborn babies. Diving into the world of pet ownership and looking for help and guidance. Growing, learning, making mistakes, etc. This forum can be a very scary place to end up during that quest. I can't speak for Chaz, and haven't been around long enough to know what the initial intent was at the creation of this forum, but I doubt it was to cause such controversy that it chases people away. Who does that benefit in the long run? A "lurker" could be someone who truly needs advice and help but is unfamiliar with forums and now is afraid to join because of all the drama. That, to me, is a complete loss of a teachable moment. A chance to teach someone who proably doesn't know any better. The recipient of that unfortunate error is the poor animal, none the less.
I think this forum can be scary and unfriendly. I don't know any of you personally, and I likely never will, but I find it hard to learn here under these circumstances. If the purpose of this forum was to create a "family" that believes in certain philosophies at the exclusion of others, than perhaps, this forum should close and become just a group of people that keep in touch. It's almost cruel to allow unknowing people to join. Strangers, like me, that are just looking for help with a strange new creature that may end up in a shelter because they don't know where else to turn for help. The internet was the first place I went for help. Chaz was the first forum I found. I'd say this forum has a HUGE responsibility to people. Do you feel it is living up to that responsibility at this moment? I don't. I truly find it hard to believe that the sole purpose of this forum is to try to convince as many people as possible to see things your way - whoever "you" may be. How about education? I think that should take precedence in a public forum such as this. This forum feels more like happy hour to me most days. Often, the people who are looking to be educated are judged suspiciously.
I hope these issues are ultimately resolved, and Chaz becomes the place I hope it to be, the place I was looking for. I intend to still stop by, and look for help and join in conversation that is non-threatening, but, honestly, I think if this continues, the future of this forum looks bleak.
As a newer member to Chaz, though, I hope you take my thoughts to heart. Because, I believe, new members are as vital to a forum as the moderators and older members that have given life to the forum. Without the constant influx of new blood, a forum will eventually become stale and die out.
I came to Chaz for help. I bought a puppy and was having trouble and I, thankfully, found this forum. Fortunately, for me and the pup, I found that help. Unfortunately, many of the members that gave me the help are now gone. What differentiates these "special" people is that they gave me help in a completely non judgemental way. I was ignorant, I admit, but it seemed their goal was to educate me, not judge me and make me feel bad for the mistakes that I had made. This should be the goal. Not to chase inquiring people away because you frown upon their philosophies, pilosophies, mind you, that they may not even be aware they have - yet.
Many of us that seek Chaz out are like newborn babies. Diving into the world of pet ownership and looking for help and guidance. Growing, learning, making mistakes, etc. This forum can be a very scary place to end up during that quest. I can't speak for Chaz, and haven't been around long enough to know what the initial intent was at the creation of this forum, but I doubt it was to cause such controversy that it chases people away. Who does that benefit in the long run? A "lurker" could be someone who truly needs advice and help but is unfamiliar with forums and now is afraid to join because of all the drama. That, to me, is a complete loss of a teachable moment. A chance to teach someone who proably doesn't know any better. The recipient of that unfortunate error is the poor animal, none the less.
I think this forum can be scary and unfriendly. I don't know any of you personally, and I likely never will, but I find it hard to learn here under these circumstances. If the purpose of this forum was to create a "family" that believes in certain philosophies at the exclusion of others, than perhaps, this forum should close and become just a group of people that keep in touch. It's almost cruel to allow unknowing people to join. Strangers, like me, that are just looking for help with a strange new creature that may end up in a shelter because they don't know where else to turn for help. The internet was the first place I went for help. Chaz was the first forum I found. I'd say this forum has a HUGE responsibility to people. Do you feel it is living up to that responsibility at this moment? I don't. I truly find it hard to believe that the sole purpose of this forum is to try to convince as many people as possible to see things your way - whoever "you" may be. How about education? I think that should take precedence in a public forum such as this. This forum feels more like happy hour to me most days. Often, the people who are looking to be educated are judged suspiciously.
I hope these issues are ultimately resolved, and Chaz becomes the place I hope it to be, the place I was looking for. I intend to still stop by, and look for help and join in conversation that is non-threatening, but, honestly, I think if this continues, the future of this forum looks bleak.
If people want to leave, they leave. I am sure they will be back someday... as I think it is a little silly to say "I will never be back"... on a forum. As individuals mentioned, a forum will always change. To me, the bickering and what else is a phase... and as Grammy always says "It too shall pass". When I am fed up I either speak my mind or I'll stay away for a couple of days. If there's a thread I know will rub me wrong, I don't open it. Simple as that 
But that's just me. And I don't want to belittle someone who can not "take it" and feels the need to leave- we all are different. And to me, there are too many special people on here to leave for good.
But that's just me. And I don't want to belittle someone who can not "take it" and feels the need to leave- we all are different. And to me, there are too many special people on here to leave for good.
It wasn't really just that, though that's probably how it appears. A lot went on behind the scenes from what I understand, and I don't even know the half of it. Even though I'm in contact with them elsewhere, I miss their presence here and I wish that there was some way for the wounds to heal. But for some people, don't know if that will be possible.
Bumhouse, teaching instead of belittling and jumping to conclusions is EXACTLY the attitude we'd love to see win out here.
But - neither Chaz nor I nor - I believe - the majority of the moderating "staff" OR the membership ever wants to see this become a place where you must be PC (pet correct) to be here or ask questions or contribute. And while most of us sure don't condone some of the methods and practices that some have come here and argued for, this isn't going to be allowed to become the kind of forum where everyone has to think what we want them to think and say what we want them to say.
And yes, you newbs ARE very valuable - and ALL of my nearest and dearest here were newbs to me at one time
But - neither Chaz nor I nor - I believe - the majority of the moderating "staff" OR the membership ever wants to see this become a place where you must be PC (pet correct) to be here or ask questions or contribute. And while most of us sure don't condone some of the methods and practices that some have come here and argued for, this isn't going to be allowed to become the kind of forum where everyone has to think what we want them to think and say what we want them to say.
And yes, you newbs ARE very valuable - and ALL of my nearest and dearest here were newbs to me at one time
Ok let me get this straight
People post notifying they are leaving and they get razzed, joked, mocked, belittled etc
SO
People leave and do not post and leave, and then they get razzed, joked, mocked, belittled etc when they do that rather than the first thing
No offense you guys but pick one or the other, yeesh!
People post notifying they are leaving and they get razzed, joked, mocked, belittled etc
SO
People leave and do not post and leave, and then they get razzed, joked, mocked, belittled etc when they do that rather than the first thing
No offense you guys but pick one or the other, yeesh!
Well, that's encouraging. I think Melissa W. is right though and probably a lot went on that most of us are not aware of. I would never presume that I know or understand what went on.
I, personally, have no problem with people expressing their views and opinions - realizing that never in a million years could I, nor would I, agree with everything. Ultimately, I always have the choice to leave the thread and just move along if the discussion makes me feel uncomfortable in any way. But, sometimes, I have seen people harassed for just walking away and that's just not right. The hostile nature of some of these threads goes beyond self expression and freedom to voice one's opinion. It almost seems personal. Your damed if you do, damed if you don't kind of philosophy.
In the end, we usually drift towards places that we feel most comfortable. If the people who have left felt so strongly about their beliefs, which must have clashed with a majority of those on Chaz., than it was probably best that they left. But, like Melissa W., I miss their presence here, too. I'm not too familiar with the forum world, but I imagine people come and go all of the time - both individually and en masse. But there is a sense of loss when the people/person where large contributors. It also changes the dynamic of the forum and may make it more or less appealing to those remaining.
I, personally, have no problem with people expressing their views and opinions - realizing that never in a million years could I, nor would I, agree with everything. Ultimately, I always have the choice to leave the thread and just move along if the discussion makes me feel uncomfortable in any way. But, sometimes, I have seen people harassed for just walking away and that's just not right. The hostile nature of some of these threads goes beyond self expression and freedom to voice one's opinion. It almost seems personal. Your damed if you do, damed if you don't kind of philosophy.
In the end, we usually drift towards places that we feel most comfortable. If the people who have left felt so strongly about their beliefs, which must have clashed with a majority of those on Chaz., than it was probably best that they left. But, like Melissa W., I miss their presence here, too. I'm not too familiar with the forum world, but I imagine people come and go all of the time - both individually and en masse. But there is a sense of loss when the people/person where large contributors. It also changes the dynamic of the forum and may make it more or less appealing to those remaining.
I thought they had thick skin and so called "attitudes" - just goes to show - all bark and no bite
Yep.......and.........Yep........opcorn:
Yep.......and.........Yep........
opcorn:
Seeing as you had a falling out with a few of the members that are leaving, I wouldnt hold much stock in what your view is on the situation, because truly when someone is in a situation like that, the opinion is usually just maliscious as youve shown quite so adequately here.
Well done
I don't really care one way or the other.... except in Reggins case cause I am a little worried that something might have happened.... if someone knows otherwise.... tell me she and the baby are OK
But IMO, if you don't want to be here.... then please DON'T be here. There is nothing worse than a member who doesn't want to be here and just becomes bitter and angry and ruins the whole board for everyone else. I won't mention names but there was a member quite some time ago now that was this way.... they just became a cancer on the board because they really didn't want to be here. SO if you don't want to be here.... do us and yourself a favor and take a break
But IMO, if you don't want to be here.... then please DON'T be here. There is nothing worse than a member who doesn't want to be here and just becomes bitter and angry and ruins the whole board for everyone else. I won't mention names but there was a member quite some time ago now that was this way.... they just became a cancer on the board because they really didn't want to be here. SO if you don't want to be here.... do us and yourself a favor and take a break