Nephew afraid of Dr. Phil

PixieSticksandTricks

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#1
My 6 year old nephew screams and cries if you turn on Dr. Phil. Why you may ask? Because my sister instilled this fear in him that if he wasent good she would take him on the Dr. Phil show and he would be sent to one of those bad little kid camps "Happy Hills" or something like that. She told him this when he was three and going through this horrible stage where he was just the most hateful little kid ever. I brought it up because earlier I was watching Dr. Phil and my nephews and sister walk in. And my oldest nephew starts screaming "TURN IT OFF TURN IT OFF!!!!!" I kind of laughed (I know im a horrible aunt) and turned the channel.

I started to think maybe it wasent such a good idea to make him fear something that much. But I tell you what if you ask him "You want to go and see Dr. Phil?" he will behave like and angel. Im not sure if its a good or bad thing. What do you think?
 

jess2416

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#2
I think its awful that these days some parents have to bribe their kids to be good.....but it is kinda funny....:)

**Disclaimer** Not intended to anyone in particular*** JMO
 
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smkie

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#3
i hope he knows you are kidding....if he really believed that i think it mean and he may think so too when he gets older. I have Hyia and she is a very easy 6 year old, very mature and good in behavior but if i said such a thing to her she would be deeply wounded. I had a difficult child too, that had behaviors that would make my mind break into pieces sometimes, so i know how hard it can be. That makes trust even more an important issue. Just think a little about it ok? i wouldn't do it or say it, unless i realllllly meant it the camp thing. My daughter went to the hospital 7 times in her growing years, each one was a serious statement when it left my lips. The hospital wasn't a threat, it was a solution. She knew she needed it and so did i. THe first time was the hardest, she was 7 0r 8 I really don't rememeber. I visited her each day, never missing a visitation period to let her know i was still there for her and that she wasn't being "sent" away because she was bad, that she was getting HELP and so was i. Better that way, they are so tender on the inside.
 

PixieSticksandTricks

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#4
smkie said:
i hope he knows you are kidding....if he really believed that i think it mean and he may think so too when he gets older. I have Hyia and she is a very easy 6 year old, very mature and good in behavior but if i said such a thing to her she would be deeply wounded. I had a difficult child too, that had behaviors that would make my mind break into pieces sometimes, so i know how hard it can be. That makes trust even more an important issue. Just think a little about it ok? i wouldn't do it or say it, unless i realllllly meant it the camp thing. My daughter went to the hospital 7 times in her growing years, each one was a serious statement when it left my lips. The hospital wasn't a threat, it was a solution. She knew she needed it and so did i. THe first time was the hardest, she was 7 0r 8 I really don't rememeber. I visited her each day, never missing a visitation period to let her know i was still there for her and that she wasn't being "sent" away because she was bad, that she was getting HELP and so was i. Better that way, they are so tender on the inside.
Oh I have never said it to him. Its always been my sister im not sure if she means it as a joke or not. Both her boys have serious tempers something I beleive that get from their dad (who has to tak anger management). Both of them are really tough on her and even beat up on her sometimes. I think she was just looking for an easy way to gain control. The 6 year old is much better then ever was though. I think school has helped him alot he is much more laid back and polite.
 

smkie

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#5
its hard i know i am glad you didn't tho.
 

bubbatd

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#7
Back in my day , Moms used to say " Wait until you Father come home " ....I never did and didn't agree !! In fact there were things I never told him about because scolding a child 6 hours later when they have been already punished did no good. Had he been the type to gently talk to the child ...fine... but he would have spanked or added more consequences . It really was a shame, but he never knew how to be a father...... was sent to Military School at 13. Our kids weren't going to be ruined by his childhood experiences.
 

smkie

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#9
bubbatd said:
Back in my day , Moms used to say " Wait until you Father come home " ....I never did and didn't agree !! In fact there were things I never told him about because scolding a child 6 hours later when they have been already punished did no good. Had he been the type to gently talk to the child ...fine... but he would have spanked or added more consequences . It really was a shame, but he never knew how to be a father...... was sent to Military School at 13. Our kids weren't going to be ruined by his childhood experiences.
good for you Bubbat..plus i think it unfair to expect someone to come home after a day's hard work and even before they have had a chance to unwind, they have to deal with more stress. ANd it shows that the mother is not in control that she should be with her children if she has to wait for someone to do the hard part.
 

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