Help?

[jRapPa1337]

I have a 5 1/2 month old cockapoo male puppy. He is the greatest and I love him very very much, but it doesn't feel like he loves me! we got him when he was 12 weeks old and he is a great puppy, granted we are having some potty trining troubles still, but all and all he is intelligent and fun. The problem is he never seems like he wants to be petted or loved by anyone. when hes in a room with us all he wants to do is leave, and when we pet him he backs away and doesn't want to be petted. The reason we got this breed is because we have a family of 3 children and we wanted a dog who loved to be cuddled and petted. Perhaps its because hes young and doesnt understnad how to get attention yet? he does wimper when we are in a differnt room and hes not, but if we go into that room he immediatly proceeds to lie on the other side of the room and refuse to be petted. anyone know whats the problem? the vet says hes fine... i hope he gets over it

 

[Saje]

First of all that's not a breed. It doesn't have breed characteristics. It could be mostly poodle. Mostly Cocker... You really don't know. There aren't any breed standards. It could have other breeds in there as well. So you can't use that to judge how he 'should' be acting. And even if he was a purebred all dogs are different.

What is his history? Where did you get him from? Was he abused in the past? What kind of training do you do? If he shys away from you how do you react? What does the vet say? Is there any chance he's in pain? Animals have funny ways of showing it.

More info please

 

[jRapPa1337]

He is from a reputable breeder who was referred to us by a friend, all her puppies are very well cared for, we visited him many times before we tok him home. The vet says he is fine and shouldn't be in any kind of pain... I am thinking that he just doesn't understand how to get attention yet or something. His father is a hyper little poodle and his mother is a sweet cocker and there doesn't seem to be any problems... he is purebred etc. I hope there wasn't something fishy going on with our breeder... Perhaps the dog just has a shy personality?
When i say that the "breed" is suppose to be loving, this is based on numerous other families with cockapoos i know and when i talked to the vet about good family pets.

EDIT: we are taking to obedience classes starting in a few weeks, but so far i have just been doing the usal commands of sit, stay, come, down, etc.

When he shys away usually we just let him go, we dont' want to force himn to be petted and handeled if he doesnt want to do we?

 

[Saje]

Sorry, he's not a purebred. He's a mix between a cocker and a poodle. There could be something going on with your breeder since reputable breeders don't breed cockapoos. He may not have been socialized properly as a pup. Is he supervised around your children? How are you building his selfconfidence since he seems a bit timid?

 

[smkie]

we had a labrador at the kennels that didn't like to be petted..he simply didn't and that was that..enjoyed being around people but didn't like to be touched. He had never been abused..was born and raised at the kennels so there was no pre existing trauma. Every dog comes with his/her own personality. This dog was the only one i ever met like this. If you are wanting a dog that behaves differently you might want to rehome your dog with a person that matches his personality more and found one that fit your families needs in a better match. I could tell you about 20 different labradors..all the same breed with a totally different personality..learning aptitude..likes and dislikes. That is why i really disapprove of generalizing a breed into specifics. There each unique in their very own way. THe only thing similar is the markings and size. EVen then if you know them well enough ....people use to come to the kennels and ask me how i could tell them apart and i would think how could you not? Your dog is still young so maybe he will warm up to affection. Most animals do not like to be held tightly especially in the beginning. So i was start with a gentle scratch on the back of the neck..you could also try t-touch massage. I have learned a great deal about this lately and have reaped the benefits with my over active pointer. I use it too for relieving my old dog's arthritis. I wish you luck and hope that if you do keep your dog you will love him for who he is..sounds like you do from the beginning of your post.
here is the link for the tellington touch massage http://www.dogpatch.org/training/ttouch.html

 

[jRapPa1337]

Saje when I say purebred i mean his parents are both purebred and akc registered poodle and cockers. And doesn't reputable just mean that the breeder knows what they are doing and is trustworth, ie knows how to socialize etc. Well from what we could tell of the breeder and what our local vet knew (we live in a fairly small town) about the breeder she was good... i really don't think that thats the problem. We are thinking about our options but we really don't want to give him to a friend; we love him very much! It just doesn't feel like he seems the same way

EDIT: smkie thanks for the advice, we are still giving him time. If it continues then we will try that method before we even think of re-homing.
thanks for your help

 

[Saje]

http://www.jlhweb.net/Boxermap/reputablebreeder.html

http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/06014/637956.stm

Well, if your vet says he doesn't have health problems and your kids haven't been hassling him you'll probably just have to start off slow and give him space. Don't push him. Give him room to breathe and let him come up to you on his own time. Lots of praise and love. Make him feel like the great dog he is and be consistent.

 

[smkie]

my mom read somewhere that dogs like scrathing and cats like stroking..there are several places that dogs seem to really enjoy..ears can go either way..my labs like theirs rubbed really hard and my mom's mixed breed had tender ears (not infected or irrated either) just really sensitive., I have found that if i scratch gently rolling the fur up sort of in my fingers starting on the back sort of to the side of the neck and going towards the top of the head to be dog's all time favorite spot..every dog i ever touch closes his eyes and leans in when i do this..the t-touch might be a good way to introduce touch ..sort of a back up and start over approach. There are different levels and pressures. I learned of this method on a show on tv. the woman that developed it has done amazing healing with all kinds of animals. She says she doesn't know why it works, only that it does. Zoos from all over the world send for her when their efforts of other medicines fail. I was most amazed with her killer whale story. He had a skin infection that nothing but nothing helped. She did her t-touch (i don't remember all the details) and he healed almost immediantly. I thought something like that should be worth learning.

 

[tessa_s212]

Your dog's breeder was most likely NOT reputable.

I do own a few cockers that aren't exactly always wanting petted. Our oldest girl isn't one to beg for attention. Cockers are suposed to love and enjoy attention, but our oldest girl came from a horrible breeder, as your pup also probably did.

If nothing else is wrong, I woudln't worry too much.

 

[EliNHunter]

Sounds like that could just be your pup's personality. Cockers, especially, don't seem want to be cuddled or coddled. I wouldn't push the issue, either. It might just make your dog neurotic. Please rescue a mutt from a shelter next time... or a purebred from a shelter... as an adult. Then you know what you're getting, even though lots of work and training still needs to go into it.

 

[JennSLK]

It has poodle in it. Enough said.


Im sorry guys I just cant stand poodles. I HATE them. Now dont get me wrong I would never be mean to them, I just have strong feelings against them. Call me "racist" if you want but I just dont like them.


Personally I think that no reputable breeder would breed cockapoos. Its not a breed, its another fashion statement mix. Not saying thats why you got one, but generally.

 

[gaddylovesdogs]

Just because his parents are AKC registered doesn't mean the breeder is responsible. The AKC will register almost any dog - in fact, someone was able to register two cats as golden retrievers once with the American Kennel Club

It has poodle in it. Enough said.


Im sorry guys I just cant stand poodles. I HATE them. Now dont get me wrong I would never be mean to them, I just have strong feelings against them. Call me "racist" if you want but I just dont like them.

And why don't you like them? Because of they're looks. It's so idiotic how people base their opinions on things such as looks.

 

[Brattina88]

I'm not positive about poodles, but I think both breeds are prone to several different skin conditions. Sometimes its not so much of a disease or condition, just a sensitivity of the skin to heat, cold, or touch. This is sadly common in cockers, but its not supposed to be.

Do you think its more behviorial, or physical?
Did you ask your vet specifically about this problem?
What age did you get your pup?

I say don't push your pup too much. Talk to him and fuss over him before you pet him, tickle his fur gently and then let him be. Make it as pleasent as possible, and don't do it too often. Little treat niblets can help speed things up a little.

 

[SiberianMaster]

I would just give it time. My puppy wasn't that cuddly when I first got him, but as he got older he got more and more lovable. Keep treats in you pockets and when he aprouches you or take interest in you give him a treat and some soft quick love.

 

[Gwinnywillow]

Anyone claiming to "hate" Poodles has never met a well bred Standard Poodle. They are Dobermans in drag. I used to be spastic on the subject of Poodles....especially toys. I worked for a show kennel owned by friends and they had about 25 Toys. You could NOT shut them up--even if you cut their throats!!!! (just kidding).

People on forums such as this should be well aware of the fact that the majority of dogs encountered of ANY breed are most likely from backyard breeders who know nothing of temperament or bloodlines. All they know is $$$. So it is unfair for John or Jane Q. Public to judge any breed of dog, since essentially they know nothing about the breed in question as it SHOULD and COULD be. We see the worst of almost every breed "On the streets" or in people's yards.

Reputable breeders breed for temperament just as much as for good looks. Backyard breeders have no clue even what "good looks" should "LOOK" like!

And anyone who breeds MUTTS is NOT a reputable breeder. They are money hungry puppy producers. P.T. Barnum put it very well when he said "there is a sucker born every day"....or was it every hour??

There will always be loving, well meaning, kind people who want a dog to love who will be duped into paying out big bucks for a MUTT. It is sad, because everyone who has a dog likes to have "pride of ownership". Some have their feelings crushed when they proudly say that they have a PeekaPoo, or ShiPoo, and the other people laugh and inform them that basically all they have is a common MUTT. That is sad.

A dog is a dog is a dog is a dog is a dog as far as those beseeching brown (or blue, or yellow) eyes, and the wagging tail, and the kisses given, and the love that just oozes from every pore! The only advantage of purebred is that you know what size and such the dog will be when grown, you have a pretty good idea of the basic personality, you have a dog whose "looks" you like--that are appealing to YOUR eye. Essentially the only difference between mutt and purebred is external. As far as being a love machine, most every dog on the planet meets that STANDARD!!!

 

[Stump1000]

I think if you give him love and keep it going, he'll come out of it. My Cocker spaniel, i got at about 7-8 weeks and when i got her... there was some kids holding her and the male. The kids were doing exactly what you shouldnt do with a puppy that litlte. Anyways, she wasnt a big people person... but now at about 7 months, she has changed a lot. I can carry her for a few minutes for she'll want down, she'll even stand up when i go to pick her up, like reaching for me. She'll jump in my lap and love on me. She's really sweet but not a real big people person still. I have a jackapoo that loves people. He sleeps on us during the day, always has to be in someones lap. I think its a difference of how the puppy is raised at a very young age.


I think all this about the pure breed stuff is crap! Just because you get a pure bred dog from a reputable breeder dont mean a lot. My jackapoo may be a mut to you, but the best dogs i've ever had have been muts. My jackapoo has just as much value to me as my cocker spaniel does. If you dont love your dog for the personality the dog has... then you shouldnt have a dog at all. Pure bred, muts.... they are all awesome! I think most of its how they are raised.

 

[Fran27]

I also think that either the puppy wasn't well socialized, or he's just independent. You said the father was hyper, but was he cudly too? It might come from that.

Bottom line, whether purebred or mutts, it's never possible to predict the character of a puppy - I don't quite understand why the breeder sold you that puppy if you were looking for a dog to cuddle with though. At 12 weeks, they should have known better (as well as breeding mutts, but that's another subject).

 

[Tinaweena]

It has poodle in it. Enough said.


Im sorry guys I just cant stand poodles. I HATE them. Now dont get me wrong I would never be mean to them, I just have strong feelings against them. Call me "racist" if you want but I just dont like them.


Personally I think that no reputable breeder would breed cockapoos. Its not a breed, its another fashion statement mix. Not saying thats why you got one, but generally.

Are you kidding to make people angry with you? Have you ever spent time with a Poodle? My uncle had a giant poodle when I was young, and it was the smartest, most loving, gentle dog I've ever been around.
They are known to be one of the smartest of breeds in all of dogdom! I understand having a preference for a certain breed, but to actually dislike a dog because it's a Poodle, is, I'm sorry, breedist <--new word invented just for you.