Lucky_Lover, please don't beat yourself up over things in the past that you can't change anymore. everyone lives and learns, i doubt that there is a single person here on this forum who hasn't done things to their pets that they regret. when i was a kid, i had a beautiful great dane. it was our first dog and nobody in my family knew a whole lot about dog care, feeding and so on. we did many things that i wouldn't do now that i know better, and i sometimes still feel bad about it too, but i know my dog had a good life with us, better than most dogs have. i also still feel bad that until about five years ago i fed my cats science diet, which is one of the worst "popular brands" on the market. but guess what. at some point i started researching, and while i know a thousand times more now than i did five years ago, five years into the future i will know a thousand times more than now and probably laugh about what i don't know right now. live and learn. when i was 16, i couldn't wait to get out of school and do something better with my life. i'll be 33 this year and actually looking forward to go back to school and learn more. it's probably not going to happen this year and maybe not even next year, but eventually i want to prove myself and get professionally certified. don't be embarassed. do what i did, take things into your own hands and learn what you can. i can offer you all the info on my website, to which you can get by just clicking on my signature. if there's anything on there that you think needs more clarification, or you have any other questions, feel free to email me.