For chazzers in long-term relationships - how often?
- Thread starter milos_mommy
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You all think I am a monster, and that is ok. Maybe I am, but trust me, there are a lot more people out there who share my opinion, they are just too afraid to speak up because they are afraid of a response like the one I got. About how their kids are special snowflakes and how I shouldnt be appalled or irritated by them or their parents because its not "socially acceptable" and "who doesnt love kids". If I were out somewhere and my puppy was being a jerk, we would leave, or I would put him in the car, simple as that. If course you cant leave a kid in a car, but the alternative would be if they dont want to act nice, I would have my OH do the shopping and we sit in the car.
If I threw a fit, we went outside and had a talk about if I kept it up, we would be going home and I would NOT be happy when I got there.
If I threw a fit, we went outside and had a talk about if I kept it up, we would be going home and I would NOT be happy when I got there.
Ok, I'll bite...
Kids are members of society today. Part of raising them is teaching them how to act in social situations. Some handle it well. Others do not, but they need to be in society in order to know how to act in society. Some of the greatest lessons I've ever learned, professionally, personally and as a parent came from doing something incorrectly.
They don't suddenly turn into adjusted, productive adults on their 18th birthday. It's a process. The only manual the kids come with is written in a foreign language, out of order and the index is missing. The parents are learning as much as the children are.
I will grant you that there are parents out there who quite frankly shouldn't be parents, but that is NOT our decision to make. Barring abuse and situations where the children are endangered, being a shitty parent is, unfortunately, not illegal.
Kids are members of society today. Part of raising them is teaching them how to act in social situations. Some handle it well. Others do not, but they need to be in society in order to know how to act in society. Some of the greatest lessons I've ever learned, professionally, personally and as a parent came from doing something incorrectly.
They don't suddenly turn into adjusted, productive adults on their 18th birthday. It's a process. The only manual the kids come with is written in a foreign language, out of order and the index is missing. The parents are learning as much as the children are.
I will grant you that there are parents out there who quite frankly shouldn't be parents, but that is NOT our decision to make. Barring abuse and situations where the children are endangered, being a shitty parent is, unfortunately, not illegal.
Oh great and wise childrearing expert! What should I have done when my child was throwing a tantrum today BECAUSE he wanted to leave? And if you remember, I said we walked so there was no car to put him in (besides which he's only 3 and I can't leave him anywhere unsupervised). And I am also a single mom, so who is available to do my shopping for me? Please tell me all the answers! I would love someone to shop for me or be willing to supervise my children while I shop.
Also, there is a massive difference between raising puppies and children. You can lock a puppy in a crate and not be arrested for one thing.
Also, there is a massive difference between raising puppies and children. You can lock a puppy in a crate and not be arrested for one thing.
This is interesting, coming from someone who once claimed she must have a disproportionate amount of terrible parents in her area when called out and told that no one else experiences these dramatic, awful scenes nearly as frequently as she claims to.
And you think every other parent should be doing this? Because this clearly worked so well to raise you into a well adjusted human being.
And now we've come full circle: then you're obviously irresponsible for bringing a child into the world when you shouldn't have!!!! We've come full circle!1
And you think every other parent should be doing this? Because this clearly worked so well to raise you into a well adjusted human being.
And now we've come full circle: then you're obviously irresponsible for bringing a child into the world when you shouldn't have!!!! We've come full circle!1
Also, people don't "speak up" because they have manners. Not because they're afraid. Some things are just douchey to complain about. Like, I hate it when someone empties their colostomy bag in a public restroom because holy wow the smell, but it's not their fault and I can deal. Whatever. When I use a public restroom I assume the risk of freaky smells.
I DON'T go around online and find support threads/forums for people with colostomies and complain about how it's so gross to inflict the smell on unsuspecting people in public restrooms. Doing so would make me a superdouche. It's about manners and tact. Most people have it to some degree.
I DON'T go around online and find support threads/forums for people with colostomies and complain about how it's so gross to inflict the smell on unsuspecting people in public restrooms. Doing so would make me a superdouche. It's about manners and tact. Most people have it to some degree.
I'm very much not fond of children, and I have a very low tolerance for stranger shenanigans. I'm out in public a lot.
The last time I was bothered by a child was on an airplane in January, and that was only bothersome because she was kicking my seat while I tried to sleep and I was trapped and already grumpy. I (gently, politely, because I was talking to a human being) asked the child to stop a few times, and eventually her mother stepped in and got her to quit (I'd guess the girl was between four and six--I'm bad at ages). It's not an incident worth talking about (if it's even an incident at all tbh) but prior to that I can't really think of the last time I was really bothered by someone's child in public... maybe 9 years ago, when my boyfriend had a kid spit on him at a museum? That was pretty outrageous--funny now though!
Basically what I'm trying to say is, even I, someone who is very committed to not having children specifically because I don't like spending time with them, don't agree with your position on this. Either you are in a super-bubble of imposition or you might be overly sensitive to children. (And I'd bet it's the second one. :] )
Oh and as for the thread topic, me'n my boyfriend do the do about twice a week. I'd like more, he's fine as is.
The last time I was bothered by a child was on an airplane in January, and that was only bothersome because she was kicking my seat while I tried to sleep and I was trapped and already grumpy. I (gently, politely, because I was talking to a human being) asked the child to stop a few times, and eventually her mother stepped in and got her to quit (I'd guess the girl was between four and six--I'm bad at ages). It's not an incident worth talking about (if it's even an incident at all tbh) but prior to that I can't really think of the last time I was really bothered by someone's child in public... maybe 9 years ago, when my boyfriend had a kid spit on him at a museum? That was pretty outrageous--funny now though!
Basically what I'm trying to say is, even I, someone who is very committed to not having children specifically because I don't like spending time with them, don't agree with your position on this. Either you are in a super-bubble of imposition or you might be overly sensitive to children. (And I'd bet it's the second one. :] )
Oh and as for the thread topic, me'n my boyfriend do the do about twice a week. I'd like more, he's fine as is.
This is interesting, coming from someone who once claimed she must have a disproportionate amount of terrible parents in her area when called out and told that no one else experiences these dramatic, awful scenes nearly as frequently as she claims to.
And you think every other parent should be doing this? Because this clearly worked so well to raise you into a well adjusted human being.
And now we've come full circle: then you're obviously irresponsible for bringing a child into the world when you shouldn't have!!!! We've come full circle!1
And you think every other parent should be doing this? Because this clearly worked so well to raise you into a well adjusted human being.
And now we've come full circle: then you're obviously irresponsible for bringing a child into the world when you shouldn't have!!!! We've come full circle!1
Are you on every forum about dogs? I stay in communities where I like and enjoy the community regardless of what the theme is. I have left forums not because I don't like dogs or horses but because I didn't really enjoy that community. Life is too short to spend it with people you don't like or even respect.
I didn't 'retreat' from those forums. Are you staying despite not enjoying it here as some sort of defiance or punishment?
I can't say I have a problem with you. I just tend to ignore your posts as I don't feel they add to the forum/community. They don't stir up good discussion (you need some reason on both sides to have a good debate) they don't add anything so I just ignore them for the most part. I just had to jump in to this thread because the hypocrisy was highly amusing.
ETA you might be a more enjoyable member (and get more use out of the forum yourself) if you spent half the passion on posting about dogs as you do on your strange crusade against the next generation.
I didn't 'retreat' from those forums. Are you staying despite not enjoying it here as some sort of defiance or punishment?
I can't say I have a problem with you. I just tend to ignore your posts as I don't feel they add to the forum/community. They don't stir up good discussion (you need some reason on both sides to have a good debate) they don't add anything so I just ignore them for the most part. I just had to jump in to this thread because the hypocrisy was highly amusing.
ETA you might be a more enjoyable member (and get more use out of the forum yourself) if you spent half the passion on posting about dogs as you do on your strange crusade against the next generation.