dream? pregnant?

[HoundedByHounds]

wow.. ok and uh.. even if you do get pregnant at a young age doesnt make you a bad mother. my mom was a teen mother. my grandmother was a teen mother, and my nina was a teen mother and they are GREAT parents.

Family history does not always equate to good choices being made. If I had a family history of getting pregnant as a teen I'd really, really try not to duplicate that in any way shape or form.

In fact I haven't...my Mom was a single Mom of 19. I could look into her face any day of the week and see how tired she was, how HARD she had to work...there is NO way I wanted to look like that in my late 20's/early 30's thank you. I made better choices and that is how I show my Mother than she has TAUGHT me something. I am now in a position to HELP my Mother and care for her if and when I need to.

I did not have sex til I was 21 I did not have children until I was married and I am married still and committed in every way to keeping my marriage solid and my childrens future's secure. THAT is what my Mom's teen single Mom struggle taught me...not that "it's not the end of the world if I get knocked up".

Perhaps that's what's meant by maturity. The ability to see choices made that weren't perhaps the wisest and use those as a basis to NOT repeat them rather than an excuse or justification TO repeat them.

 

[Buddy'sParents]

Family history does not always equate to good choices being made. If I had a family history of getting pregnant as a teen I'd really, really try not to duplicate that in any way shape or form.

In fact I haven't...my Mom was a single Mom of 19. I could look into her face any day of the week and see how tired she was, how HARD she had to work...there is NO way I wanted to look like that in my late 20's/early 30's thank you. I made better choices and that is how I show my Mother than she has TAUGHT me something. I am now in a position to HELP my Mother and care for her if and when I need to.

I did not have sex til I was 21 I did not have children until I was married and I am married still and committed in every way to keeping my marriage solid and my childrens future's secure. THAT is what my Mom's teen single Mom struggle taught me...not that "it's not the end of the world if I get knocked up".

Perhaps that's what's meant by maturity. The ability to see choices made that weren't perhaps the wisest and use those as a basis to NOT repeat them rather than an excuse or justification TO repeat them.

:hail:

As always Gina, you are a voice of reason. Rock on with your bad self.

 

[joce]

Family history does not always equate to good choices being made. If I had a family history of getting pregnant as a teen I'd really, really try not to duplicate that in any way shape or form.

In fact I haven't...my Mom was a single Mom of 19. I could look into her face any day of the week and see how tired she was, how HARD she had to work...there is NO way I wanted to look like that in my late 20's/early 30's thank you. I made better choices and that is how I show my Mother than she has TAUGHT me something. I am now in a position to HELP my Mother and care for her if and when I need to.

I did not have sex til I was 21 I did not have children until I was married and I am married still and committed in every way to keeping my marriage solid and my childrens future's secure. THAT is what my Mom's teen single Mom struggle taught me...not that "it's not the end of the world if I get knocked up".

Perhaps that's what's meant by maturity. The ability to see choices made that weren't perhaps the wisest and use those as a basis to NOT repeat them rather than an excuse or justification TO repeat them.

Great post but I doubt she'll get it.

Your parents make mistakes so you hopefully wont have to repeat them. A line of teen moms is just horrible! thats nothing to brag about! Its time to stop and say you want better for your children. It sounds like its the plot line to some backwoods comedy or a lifelong darwin award.

 

[bubbatd]

^^^^ agree ! I baby sat at that age ...was great to enjoy the kids , get paid and go home !

 

[puppylover2007]

That's about what i was about to say. No one here is saying that you can't be a great mother at 16... we're just not advocating for anyone to try and do it. If it happens by mistake.. then you take responsibility. If I were to say that teenagers lives are ruined if they get pregnant, then I'd be saying I ruined my own life.. which I have not. I just think that puppylove's advocasy for teenage pregnancy is absolutely off the grid. I think my jaw is still gaping open at some of the stuff that was said in her posts.

Having a baby young DOES change your life. Having a baby when you are mature and ready and planning it... DOES change your life. It's just easier to cope with the drastic changes when you are mature enough to have good coping skills and make good decisions.

There is no magical age when someone is ready to have a baby. I've seen some 30 year old women having babies that I just sit there and scratch my head and wonder how they will manage.

But to have a baby when you really haven't had the chance to live and experience life is just sad. There is so much you miss out on. Puppylove, you can't tell us that when you had your child you didn't miss out on going out and socializing with your friends like you probably did in high school. Or hanging out at the mall or where ever it is teens hang out these days. You can't just take off and do whatever you want whenever you want.

actually i did have a wonderful childhood and when i did have my child i did the same things, when i went to the movies i took my son, when i went out to dinner i took my son, when went to a game or the mall i TOOK MY SON, gee i see a pattern here I TOOK MY SON EVERYWHERE I WENT!!! all of you that had kids young were just not wanting the excitement and feeling of raising a child, when i went on trips i TOOK my son! he was rarely left at a babysitter's home, the only time i had to was when i took a test at the college, H@LL i even took my son to court when i filed for divorce!

you all seem to think that life comes to a hault well, it does not, and so what if i am supporting teens who want to get preggers and have children, who are YOU to say if they are ready or NOT? who are you to say they are not mature enough to have a child? if they are ready then LET THEM BE!

 

[bubbatd]

Yes , I saw many teenagers with their newborns at the State Fair this year ......

 

[Buddy'sParents]

Yes , I saw many teenagers with their newborns at the State Fair this year ......

LMAO... Grammy, you so kill me sometimes. I love you. :hail: :hail:

 

[Buddy'sParents]

*snorts* Grammy.. I dunno why but that triggered a laugh I've needed so badly today... I'm still LOLing...

 

[Squishy22]

and just how full grown ADULT should you be when you have children?

Lets see... at 20 I would see that as a full grown adult. But its not all about AGE its more about being mentally mature and financially stable, and those things come with age. You shouldn't be having kids at ANY age if you are not financially stable, and a KNOW a 16 year old is not going to be. You dont want to have a child to take care of when you are still in high school and its not fair to the child. Give me a break for crying out loud! Its common sense. If your parents are supporting you then what makes you think that you can support another kid yourself?

What about the health issues that come with having a baby when your body isn't even fully developed yet? Your body needs to be fully mature for child baring anyhow, otherwise you are putting yourself and your baby's life in danger.

 

[drmom777]

Yes , I saw many teenagers with their newborns at the State Fair this year ......

RRROFL!!!!!! I have missed you, Grammy.

 

[Buddy'sParents]

RRROFL!!!!!! I have missed you, Grammy.

I am so glad someone else found that as funny as I did.

 

[darkchild16]

I did too but i also find it sad

 

[Backward_Cinderella]

I'm not Grammy, and I don't think we've been introduced, but congratulations on your forthcoming marriage. it sounds like a great plan. I wish you much happiness

Shoot. I apologize, I must have been looking at the wrong name when I quoted! Nice to meet you too, and thanks.

 

[Buddy'sParents]

I think it was a joke, Breeze.

 

[darkchild16]

oh i know i didnt mean it towards you. I was talking more towards puppylover that it is sad that all those girls have these kids and shes encouraging more.

 

[Samantha's pet]

I hate when I see 5 week old babies out at places they dont want to be. I dont know why. It just bothers me.

 

[Backward_Cinderella]

I hate when I see five week old babies out at all. They belong at home, and the only place its really necessary for them to go is the doctor for shots. There are all kinds of viruses and germs and horrible things out there. When Adam (My little brother) was born, there was no way I'd let him go any where. My adoptive parents are in the middle of the adoption process for him. He'll be three near Thanksgiving this year.
When he was first born, our mom lived with us, and she kept trying to take him out of the house and all over the place. It was terrible, because the baby's father is a horrible person, abusive and all that jazz. I was terrified she was going to take him to the jail to see him and he'd come back with like... I don't even know, something terrible.

Whatever, my point is that five week babies don't need to be in the outside world... EVER.

 

[drmom777]

Shoot. I apologize, I must have been looking at the wrong name when I quoted! Nice to meet you too, and thanks.

You have nothing to apologize for. It's great to meet you. I have been AWOL.

 

[Backward_Cinderella]

You have nothing to apologize for. It's great to meet you. I have been AWOL.

Ah, well, welcome back. I've only been on the forum a couple of weeks, and really only active the last two or three days. I had a problem with my account and never got my confirmation e mail, so I kinda skulked around the boards until someone fixed it.

 

[Dizzy]

Whatever, my point is that five week babies don't need to be in the outside world... EVER.

No wonder there are so many allergies and sickly people in the world... you need exposing to things when you are young, so you don't get hit twice as hard when you are older....

Granted noone wants to be ill at 5 weeks old, but really - how do you think babies survived a few years ago when there wasn't such germa-phobia?