Breastfeeding in public
- Thread starter JacksonsMom
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Like I said before. I am totally okay with a woman breastfeeding publicly while being modest and discreet.
I am NOT okay with obnoxious public breast feeding. And I DO say something to them. They have the right to be a disrespectful fool, I have the right to exercise my freedom of speech and tell them. One woman in particular was in Starbucks. This will be the second time I am explaining this situation on this thread. The woman was feeding her child who was old enough and tall enough to stand next to her on the floor and feed. She was turned sideways in her chair, towards him, both breasts out. He was spitting her breasts out, spitting milk out, slapping her boobs constantly and sending them flying all over the place... That is disrespectful. Some comments on here say I should have respect for a woman feeding her child and I do, but when they respect me in turn. Doing it obnoxiously or in an "in your face" way is not the woman being respectful of anyone around her.
Like a couple have said, it's a two way street for respect. I give respect where respect is due. I've seen a woman walking through Walmart with both her boobs out and her child sitting in the seat in the cart in front of her...breastfeeding that way. Maybe it's because I live in Louisiana where modesty and tact are both very rare qualities. Lol.
I am NOT okay with obnoxious public breast feeding. And I DO say something to them. They have the right to be a disrespectful fool, I have the right to exercise my freedom of speech and tell them. One woman in particular was in Starbucks. This will be the second time I am explaining this situation on this thread. The woman was feeding her child who was old enough and tall enough to stand next to her on the floor and feed. She was turned sideways in her chair, towards him, both breasts out. He was spitting her breasts out, spitting milk out, slapping her boobs constantly and sending them flying all over the place... That is disrespectful. Some comments on here say I should have respect for a woman feeding her child and I do, but when they respect me in turn. Doing it obnoxiously or in an "in your face" way is not the woman being respectful of anyone around her.
Like a couple have said, it's a two way street for respect. I give respect where respect is due. I've seen a woman walking through Walmart with both her boobs out and her child sitting in the seat in the cart in front of her...breastfeeding that way. Maybe it's because I live in Louisiana where modesty and tact are both very rare qualities. Lol.
BUT modesty doesnt mean you have to use a cover. I dont have both boobs flopping out everywhere. My shirt is lifted on one side (which since I wear a spagetti strap underneath you dont see the skin there either.) with my tanktop and bra pulled down and IF you can see anything its no more then you would see from a tanktop since Savannahs head is in front of my nipple and the majorty that is out of my bra.
Can you explain to me what it is you find wrong about it?
Don't you like milk? Do breasts make you feel ill? Was the slapping noisy and interrupting your conversation? Were they splashing milk on you? Do breasts turn you on in public?
I can see what you're saying here, but I can't put my finger on what it is that makes you feel that way?
I'd be intrigued, and likely nosey if that sight was in front of me, but I can't see anything that would offend me there....
Don't you like milk? Do breasts make you feel ill? Was the slapping noisy and interrupting your conversation? Were they splashing milk on you? Do breasts turn you on in public?
I can see what you're saying here, but I can't put my finger on what it is that makes you feel that way?
I'd be intrigued, and likely nosey if that sight was in front of me, but I can't see anything that would offend me there....
That's the thing...when a baby's head is right in front of the boob, not that much is showing. A little blanket or part of a shirt can make it a little discrete. But the thing is...if you can't stand the sight of a certain body part or something as normal as feeding a baby, you can always turn and look in another direction or go away. I don't think I'd pay any attention to even that kind of scenario. I still think people should practice not dwelling so much on how everything the slightest bit unpleasant affects them and think about something else.
I think the real problem was the parent not teaching there child to not play with there food. imagine it was the same kids throwing fries and other food around , that would be a problem for me . i would tell the woman to control her kid and teach it some manners. no mine arent angels and have thrown food around , but i do something about it .
i have never seen a mother BF in the metro NOLA area I live in the middle of heres a bottleville. I bottle feed and it is what it is. do i regret it , no it worked for me.
to each his own , at least the kid is eating
i have never seen a mother BF in the metro NOLA area I live in the middle of heres a bottleville. I bottle feed and it is what it is. do i regret it , no it worked for me.
to each his own , at least the kid is eating
LOL! The starbucks example would require video footage for me to properly asses it 
In all seriousness though, two thoughts there. First, that’s not a breastfeeding issue, its a behavior one. Two, how much “immodesty” is not actually “immodesty” at all but elaboration and exaggeration born of our culture’s total discomfort with seeing a boob working?
I’ve seen people describe darkchild’s photo (below) as “ew groooosssss!! She was just sitting there, in your face, boob out for the world to see with the kid sucking away”
In all seriousness though, two thoughts there. First, that’s not a breastfeeding issue, its a behavior one. Two, how much “immodesty” is not actually “immodesty” at all but elaboration and exaggeration born of our culture’s total discomfort with seeing a boob working?
I’ve seen people describe darkchild’s photo (below) as “ew groooosssss!! She was just sitting there, in your face, boob out for the world to see with the kid sucking away”
For me it's not the fact that they are BF in public it's more the moms that are doing it that I have encountered are INSANELY standoffish about it.
I have aspergers. I CANNOT look you in the eye. I don't even look people in the face if I could help it just to avoid eye contact. I can't look to the side of someone's head because if someone is standing there I could potentially make eye contact with them. I know it sounds weird I've had people tell me that all the time but eye contact makes me incredibly uncomfortable to to the point of sometimes having panic attacks.
Because of that I generally look at chins or necks. Since I'm short it usually ends up eye level for me anyway. And I look straight ahead. No looking to the sides or anything like that. But I can't count the number of times I've had a BF mom scream at me to quit watching her feed her child and call me a perv when she is the one that planted herself in front of me and started feeding her kid. I wasn't even watching her. I had just looked in that general direction and zoned out. I have trouble with normal social interactions with friendly people. I have an even harder time dealing with a crazy mom who is paranoid about people watching her BF but still does it in a public place.
I have aspergers. I CANNOT look you in the eye. I don't even look people in the face if I could help it just to avoid eye contact. I can't look to the side of someone's head because if someone is standing there I could potentially make eye contact with them. I know it sounds weird I've had people tell me that all the time but eye contact makes me incredibly uncomfortable to to the point of sometimes having panic attacks.
Because of that I generally look at chins or necks. Since I'm short it usually ends up eye level for me anyway. And I look straight ahead. No looking to the sides or anything like that. But I can't count the number of times I've had a BF mom scream at me to quit watching her feed her child and call me a perv when she is the one that planted herself in front of me and started feeding her kid. I wasn't even watching her. I had just looked in that general direction and zoned out. I have trouble with normal social interactions with friendly people. I have an even harder time dealing with a crazy mom who is paranoid about people watching her BF but still does it in a public place.
When people do that, you should just look confused and say, "But I'm blind." Then walk off with a blank look on your face.
ETA: Rather, "huh? Me?" before the "I'm blind" comment.
Probably not really. But it would be funny to throw these people off.
ETA: Rather, "huh? Me?" before the "I'm blind" comment.
Probably not really. But it would be funny to throw these people off.
I'm right outside of Baton Rouge, and I felt like an alien when I pulled out a bottle to feed any of my boys, but especially Cole. The looks and comments I got from other moms about how I'm filling him with "junk", along with the lectures on how breastfeeding is always best for mother and baby (regardless of any issues it seems), was horrible. I started staying in more because I couldn't emotionally handle any more of the comments.
Being seen as "gross" when breastfeeding is awful, but so is being made out to be a stupid, lazy, uncaring parent because you bottlefeed (doesn't matter one iota if it's breastmilk in that bottle either). Personally, the stigma needs to be put to rest on both issues.
Being seen as "gross" when breastfeeding is awful, but so is being made out to be a stupid, lazy, uncaring parent because you bottlefeed (doesn't matter one iota if it's breastmilk in that bottle either). Personally, the stigma needs to be put to rest on both issues.
Just wanted to add a comment about feeding a baby while going through a buffet. *Yeah I'm slowly reading this thread XD*
I personally would find that gross/weird/annoying.
First. I understand your baby has to eat. But could it not wait long enough for you to get back to the table? I get that you baby needs to eat when it's hungry but honestly 1-2 minutes while you fix your plate is nothing. If babies could starve to death in 1-2 minutes I think we'd have quite a few less babies in the world. What if the baby spits up? I definitely would not want that happening over food I was going to eat. To be honest I cringe when I see younger kids getting their own food. Mainly because most of them don't understand the concept of 'hey other people who are not family members have to eat off this food too'. Of course the germaphobe in me keeps me from most buffet places.
Second. HOW SLOW ARE YOU GOING? You're carrying a baby and trying to get food at the same time? I'm sorry I'm impatient I can admit that. But if some lady in front of me is taking 15 minutes just because she wants to get food and juggle her baby to get the point across that she can feed where ever she feels like it I'm probably going to actually go against everything my brain is saying not to do and speak up.
I personally would find that gross/weird/annoying.
First. I understand your baby has to eat. But could it not wait long enough for you to get back to the table? I get that you baby needs to eat when it's hungry but honestly 1-2 minutes while you fix your plate is nothing. If babies could starve to death in 1-2 minutes I think we'd have quite a few less babies in the world. What if the baby spits up? I definitely would not want that happening over food I was going to eat. To be honest I cringe when I see younger kids getting their own food. Mainly because most of them don't understand the concept of 'hey other people who are not family members have to eat off this food too'. Of course the germaphobe in me keeps me from most buffet places.
Second. HOW SLOW ARE YOU GOING? You're carrying a baby and trying to get food at the same time? I'm sorry I'm impatient I can admit that. But if some lady in front of me is taking 15 minutes just because she wants to get food and juggle her baby to get the point across that she can feed where ever she feels like it I'm probably going to actually go against everything my brain is saying not to do and speak up.
Ugh I had one nurse when Savannah was in the hospital CONSTANTLY tell me there is no reason to breastfeed first and would try to take her away from me to feed her a bottle which she constantly tried to make me force feed her after she stopped eating. It was horrible. Both sides need to back off. For US (Savannah and I) formula is inferior because we do good with breastfeeding. For you Formula was best because breastfeeding didnt work. I wish more people would attempt breastfeeding before going to formula though because IF the baby can take it, it is best.
Yoko, your posts just gave me a perfect example!
Every time I read your posts I have to look at a Gif of a guy thrusting his junk towards the viewer in an elevator.
I am going to go out on a limb and assume you did not put that Gif there to offend anyone, but because you find it funny, amusing, etc. Because I don’t make negative assumptions about you, I can overlook the fact that I personally find it annoying and not something I would normally choose to look at.
By the same token, I really don’t think breastfeeding mothers are out to offend anyone when they whip a boob out and offer it to a hungry child. I assume they are not thinking about how they’re going to “school†anyone who dares feel uncomfortable with breastfeeding. I think they are simply thinking about feeding their babies.
Maybe if we all took a moment to look at others with kindness and compassion instead of judgement and criticism...
Every time I read your posts I have to look at a Gif of a guy thrusting his junk towards the viewer in an elevator.
I am going to go out on a limb and assume you did not put that Gif there to offend anyone, but because you find it funny, amusing, etc. Because I don’t make negative assumptions about you, I can overlook the fact that I personally find it annoying and not something I would normally choose to look at.
By the same token, I really don’t think breastfeeding mothers are out to offend anyone when they whip a boob out and offer it to a hungry child. I assume they are not thinking about how they’re going to “school†anyone who dares feel uncomfortable with breastfeeding. I think they are simply thinking about feeding their babies.
Maybe if we all took a moment to look at others with kindness and compassion instead of judgement and criticism...
Except the problem is, at least in the beginning of this thread because I'm not finished with it, it does come across as how quite a few breast feeding moms feel. There are quite a few posts of 'this is right for my child. HOW DARE YOU NOT LIKE IT/FEEL COMFORTABLE WITH IT. Feel comfortable with it or get over it!' feelings. They want respect but give none to people who are uncomfortable with it. This was toward people who said they didn't disagree with it they just personally felt uncomfortable.
As for the Gif I'm guessing since so many people are online they have seen the video Gangnam Style. Even if they haven't with how many parents we have on here I'm going to just guess they have seen something like this before only they've also seen the NSFW version in real life. The guy is fully dressed and isn't showing anything. Also after the thread where people talked about how they groomed their cooch hair I find it to be pretty tame by Chazhound standards.
As for the Gif I'm guessing since so many people are online they have seen the video Gangnam Style. Even if they haven't with how many parents we have on here I'm going to just guess they have seen something like this before only they've also seen the NSFW version in real life. The guy is fully dressed and isn't showing anything. Also after the thread where people talked about how they groomed their cooch hair I find it to be pretty tame by Chazhound standards.