This has me rolling

Discussion in 'Dog Jokes and Cartoons' started by 4dogs3cats, Nov 27, 2008.

  1. 4dogs3cats

    4dogs3cats Aroooooo!

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    Dog vs. Cat

    EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DAILY DIARY:
    8:00 a.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
    9:30 a.m.Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite!
    9:40 a.m.Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite!
    10:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite!
    11:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
    Noon- Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite!
    1:00 p.m.Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite!
    4:00 p.m.Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite!
    5:00 p.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
    5:30 p.m.Oh, boy! Pretty Mums! My favorite!
    6:00 p.m.Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
    6:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite!
    8:30 p.m Oh, boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!


    EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY:
    Day 183 of My Captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am
    forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional
    piece of furniture.

    Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost
    succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself
    to vomit on their favorite chair, must try this on their bed.

    Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into
    their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.

    There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the
    noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my power of "allergies." Must learn what this is
    and how to use it to my advantage.

    I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is
    obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my
    every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time .....
     
  2. Renee750il

    Renee750il Felurian

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    That's one of my favorites :D

    We probably don't want to know what the Fila version is . . . :eek:
     
  3. 4dogs3cats

    4dogs3cats Aroooooo!

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    lol... if it were about my dogs it would involve lots of howling and stealing things out of the hamper :rolleyes:
     
  4. maxfox426

    maxfox426 My dog tickles my soul

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    LOL!! I think Morgan's diary would read almost exactly like that. Except he would only love dog food twice a day instead of three times, and he doesn't sleep in our bed. :p
     
  5. rayter

    rayter Guest

    Bwahahahaha! That's sooo hilarious!!! I couldn't agree more, my dog is exceedingly lethargic!
     
  6. chazmomma66

    chazmomma66 New Member

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    Haha, thats great! Gotta love dogs!
     

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