Discussion in 'The Fire Hydrant' started by Fran101, Jun 24, 2013.
Oooh! Good luck!
I say go for it. He could be a total idiot, like I am. I didn't respond to a message on OKC for about a month.
Besides, sometimes it's just nice for someone to buy you dinner.
Oh, and my update from dating sites is that I just asked a super cute gal out for coffee. WHAT IF SHE SAYS NO. As usual, all I can think about is "what if I'm not good enough?" even when it doesn't really matter to anyone but me.
YOU WILL BE OKAY. Scratch that, you'll be awesome. I promise. I'm excited for you.
My head makes me do things that don't quite make sense to everyone else right now but i am able to rationalize it.
I drove to four... FOUR, including two that were clear across town... grocery stores tonight to find a specific kind of tea that i don't normally drink simply because it reminds me of the weekend.
I can't wait to go back. <3
He's not exactly my type physically but otherwise he seems like a really nice guy. If I met him in a bar I'd definitely flirt with him, because he is cute, just not really my type. OTOH the other important stuff is all there which always makes somebody more appealing physically. I'll for sure go on a date with him. It kinda makes me laugh though, because only just the other night did he pop up in my search results and I was like "Yeah that one never responded" and kept moving. And then there he is the very next day.
If she says no, then she says no, and she's not cool enough to withstand your awesome. Not the kind of person you want to be seeing anyway! Boo! Next!
I gotcha. And a lot of physical stuff you can change, too - getting fitter, shaving, etc. People change their looks all the time, so his pics might not even be accurate.
Who knows, maybe it's fate that took him a year to respond. But even if you don't hit it off with him, you deserve to have fun.
I guess I'm easy, because I don't really have a physical 'type' or 'look' I go after. It's all kind of on a whim. I mean, I look at pictures, but between a super hot girl that I instantly have an interest in and a girl who I feel kind of 'meh' about who has cute, dorky photos of her doing fun things. . . I now which one I'm going to contact. :rofl1:
And thank you. LOL. I feel better already.
Ever had a moment where you just sit and think to yourself, "This is the way it's supposed to be." - as if every choice, every rough patch, every internal debate over what is RIGHT and what was GOOD finally paid off and you know, without a doubt, you discovered what you were supposed to be doing all this time?
I married Jin because I thought I loved him. I also married him because he was my "knight in shining armor", and he promised to get me out of the hellhole of my mother's house. After two years, I divorced him because he was tearing me down, emotionally, mentally, physically. I loved him, don't wish him any harm, hopes he finds what he is looking for and I share part of the blame in our ruin. We were young, we didn't come from any background that let us know what we were doing was wrong, that people who love each other don't fight like that. But damage done, I got out.
Landed on my ass, because he took everything he could. Moved in with BeAu and Rhio, they were my rocks in some serious sea of ****. Mr. Jager came to visit one night, we all woke up in the same bed and Rhio calls out a, "You're the other girlfriend now." I didn't have anywhere else to go. I loved Rhio for years. I went with the flow. BeAu and I bonded well enough, and eventually sorted out our issues with each other and grew close. He did what he was supposed to do, treat us equally. Rhio used me as a blow up doll in a french maid outfit for months to make herself seem more interesting to her boyfriend. I gave her everything I had. Cleaned for her, did her make up, her hair, helped her son with his homework, eased tensions when her and BeAu fought, gave her someone to lean on and did everything she asked of me. "I want sex/attention with BeAu", so I backed off. "I want another kid", so I was super excited, loved the idea, explored options and sat with her for hours fantasizing. I helped her plan her wedding, because I wanted her happy. She used me, lied to me, led me on for months, never showed me any REAL love or interest before - finally - I let it go and she confessed she didn't love me "that way". She was done with me and wanted to kick me to the curb. BeAu didn't agree. So we ended up trying to make it work. Rhio broke up with BeAu, tried to kick us both out. It was a perfect excuse, she had been trying to break up with him for the past year. She caused drama and strife where there was none. Convinced herself, and others, that I was trying to kill her, that I "stole" her fiance, that I would turn her son against her, that I was a homewrecking *****, that I was nothing, would never amount to anything, and I deserved everything I got from Jin and my mom. Created stories about him cheating on me with her, just to create issues because she "didn't think I'd actually leave him". She painted the story of her coming to the rescue of an abused housewife, taking her in, then the girl slick steals her man from under her nose. She never mentions that she dated me too, never mentions anything I did for her, how I loved her.
People come up to us and say, "How dare you do that to Jerrod and Rhio?" How dare us do....what? Me asking for a divorce from my abusive husband and after EIGHT MONTHS moving on? Us giving her what she wanted? Dealing with the stalking, the phone calls, the rumors with silence instead of social war? How dare us...be happy, despite all this ridiculousness? How dare we....?
It's sorta silly, looking back on all of it. It's like imagining there's a hornet in your room, but it was just a fly all along. Something mildly annoying, buzzes in your ear every now and then, but you just swat it away and go on with what you were doing. We're happy. If we want it, we just do it. Do what makes you happy, not what makes other people happy.
Besides, Jin is finally giving me the divorce now. :banana:
My brother is actually shipping out first thing after graduation. I'll be able to spend this time with him.
Things happen and I just breathe a sigh of relief that I chose this instead of something else.
Woot. I love my life. And I'm still moving to Colorado. :first:
2013 has been an interesting year. But not a BAD year. It's been a learning year.
I want to make cookies. I need to make cookies. I am making cookies when I get home.
I just made Pumpkin cookies, NOMNOMNOMNOM!
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Peanut butter cookies here!
I have been craving sugar cookies like a crazy person!
and not even the fancy kind.
My favorite of all time?
Glad everything is moving forward, and starting to work out for you .
I have a message from a user with Raj in his name and the message is "have you ever met an Indian guy before?"
I really really want to send a message back asking if this is a Big Bang Theory joke.
I made no bake cookies!!!
...and we ate them all.
Or just tell him all the Indian women you've met have already warned you away. :rofl1:
"I live in a university town with a huge international student presence. But NO. NEVER. INDIAN YOU SAY?"
Waffles for dinner! Huzzah!
Got home too late to make cookies last night. TONIGHT, TONIGHT. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5_QffCZs-bg ETA replace Maria & Tony with cookies
"O hai, I had my ear cut off today."
My poor dinosaur. My poor bank account, too. Was planning on putting it on my credit card because you know, then it's like free money... but oh no. No, "we don't take Discover." CURSE YOU.
jk they're still awesome.
so sad and frustrated and thoughtful and i dont even know if i should put this here or make a new thread except i really just need to lay my thoughts down, and i dont really think i need feedback or help. theres a guy iv known, only online, for most of my life. like, 18 years. we "dated" when we first met, professed our undying love for each other, blahblah (we were 13 and 15 or some such), but i lived in CA and he in SC. life happened and we lost touch like 5 times over the next 10 years, always randomly finding each other again and again in the weirdest places, forums, chat rooms, 4chan, etc). this time we've stayed in touch and now im in Detroit MI and hes in Albany NY and wow. being so close has made things super intense. we've NEVER MET. i want to go see him, but neither of us can afford the greyhound ticket for me to go there, not for several months maybe longer. hes also suggested a few times i come live with him, the idea of which nearly drowned me in the need to be with him and see him. i want to pack up and go move with him, financially its a sound idea, i could get a better job there and my rent would be lower, and so would his, and morale for both of us would skyrocket because we're both kind of lonely and miss each other all the time (miss is the wrong word, bt you get the idea).
issue is, i feel like this is a big huge ginormous thing and that we need to talk about it in person, but the first time we meet after 18 years is going ot be so horrible and wonderful and asajfhdzskjbglskdzhgflskd i dont think anything productive can happen, life-plan-wise. but im terrified that if i just sit around and wait and wait for one of us to have the money for me to see him, something will happen, he will find somebody, or move away, or something. and iv already lost him to other people twice and it killed me to smile and say im happy for you, im not sure i could go through it again.
fml. i dont know what to do.
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