Something my cousin posted on FB about Halloween
- Thread starter darkchild16
- Start date
So just based off the first half of this thread, I think some people are taking Halloween a little too seriously. They're kids. They're just going out to get free candy. Just give it to them and move on. We are not going to solve the problem of rude people/children by making them say thank you on Halloween.
If a kid doesn't say thank you.... oh well? Do you regret giving them the candy or are you going to take it back? Would you have said they can't have any candy if you knew they weren't going to thank you? I mean really.
And the only children I feel like I ever have any right to "teach" are my nieces and nephews, and only if their parents aren't there to do it. I'm not going to make a child on Halloween tell me thank you. Not my job.
We don't hand out candy anymore but when we did, I really didn't worry about who was at my door or what they did or did not say to me. I'm just gonna smile and hand out my candy like was intended when it was bought.
If a kid doesn't say thank you.... oh well? Do you regret giving them the candy or are you going to take it back? Would you have said they can't have any candy if you knew they weren't going to thank you? I mean really.
And the only children I feel like I ever have any right to "teach" are my nieces and nephews, and only if their parents aren't there to do it. I'm not going to make a child on Halloween tell me thank you. Not my job.
We don't hand out candy anymore but when we did, I really didn't worry about who was at my door or what they did or did not say to me. I'm just gonna smile and hand out my candy like was intended when it was bought.
My issue is the ignorance, and yes, it mostly comes from the parents. Last night was trick or treating night on base, and it was a NIGHTMARE for me.
I WILL judge you, harshly, when you are letting your kids run out in front of cars screaming their bloody heads off.
I WILL judge you, harshly, when you leave a BABY STROLLER in the MIDDLE OF THE STREET to go chase down some toddler who should have probably been leashed to you, since you obviously are NOT in control whatsoever.
I WILL judge you when you ring my door bell and act rude in front of your child THREE TIMES after I tell you I am NOT handing out candy.
And I will judge, so, so harshly for taking out toddlers and infants in the freezing SLEET because it was the PARENTS collecting the candy and socializing in the streets. When they had their OWN party they could go to in 2 freaking hours anyway! Complete with child care! And more free candy!
I totally judge the parents for not being, you know, parents and expecting everyone else to watch over and parent their kids. Oooh, that drives me INSANE let alone the safety of it! I listened to kids screaming bloody murder for most of the late afternoon, my doorbell was rang several times BY PARENTS even when my light wasn't on. I had kids running out in front of my car, standing there, and screaming bloody murder. I was crawling down the road and nearly had stupid parents let me hit their kid several times. "Oh, she'll stop..." NOT IF YOUR KID IS SMALLER THAN MY CAR AND I CAN'T SEE IT! Oh, and those were just the parents watching. Most were no where to be seen. In the freezing sleet and ice and wind.
Holy ****. You all had no idea how many kids I felt compelled to hoard inside my house for a little Halloween party just because I didn't trust their parents to keep them safe. At all. Let alone warm, since most of these kids weren't wearing coats since it would "ruin the costume". And keep in mind there were cops all around the base, actively condoning all of this because they sure as heck wasn't asking anyone to control their kids, put reflectors on them, or at the very least stay on the sidewalks. Heck, they were getting drunk with the parents!
I do not understand this holiday. At all. Halloween, scare the **** out of Liz? Mission accomplished.
Honestly, the last thing I was worried about was a kid saying "Please" or "Thank you" or "excuse me".
/rant.
I WILL judge you, harshly, when you are letting your kids run out in front of cars screaming their bloody heads off.
I WILL judge you, harshly, when you leave a BABY STROLLER in the MIDDLE OF THE STREET to go chase down some toddler who should have probably been leashed to you, since you obviously are NOT in control whatsoever.
I WILL judge you when you ring my door bell and act rude in front of your child THREE TIMES after I tell you I am NOT handing out candy.
And I will judge, so, so harshly for taking out toddlers and infants in the freezing SLEET because it was the PARENTS collecting the candy and socializing in the streets. When they had their OWN party they could go to in 2 freaking hours anyway! Complete with child care! And more free candy!
I totally judge the parents for not being, you know, parents and expecting everyone else to watch over and parent their kids. Oooh, that drives me INSANE let alone the safety of it! I listened to kids screaming bloody murder for most of the late afternoon, my doorbell was rang several times BY PARENTS even when my light wasn't on. I had kids running out in front of my car, standing there, and screaming bloody murder. I was crawling down the road and nearly had stupid parents let me hit their kid several times. "Oh, she'll stop..." NOT IF YOUR KID IS SMALLER THAN MY CAR AND I CAN'T SEE IT! Oh, and those were just the parents watching. Most were no where to be seen. In the freezing sleet and ice and wind.
Holy ****. You all had no idea how many kids I felt compelled to hoard inside my house for a little Halloween party just because I didn't trust their parents to keep them safe. At all. Let alone warm, since most of these kids weren't wearing coats since it would "ruin the costume". And keep in mind there were cops all around the base, actively condoning all of this because they sure as heck wasn't asking anyone to control their kids, put reflectors on them, or at the very least stay on the sidewalks. Heck, they were getting drunk with the parents!
I do not understand this holiday. At all. Halloween, scare the **** out of Liz? Mission accomplished.
Honestly, the last thing I was worried about was a kid saying "Please" or "Thank you" or "excuse me".
/rant.
EXACTLY. With my issues it sounds crazy but I work as a customer service agent XD
I'm fine 99.9% of the time until we reach the end I say thank you and the person goes 'ok'. I'm not allowed to hang up and have to just kind of sit there. I can say thank you or ask if they need anything else but I don't really know where to go from there.
It sucks.
When you can't tell if a conversation/interaction is over or not it's really awkward.
I'm fine 99.9% of the time until we reach the end I say thank you and the person goes 'ok'. I'm not allowed to hang up and have to just kind of sit there. I can say thank you or ask if they need anything else but I don't really know where to go from there.
It sucks.
When you can't tell if a conversation/interaction is over or not it's really awkward.
Speaking of cold and costumes do you know how hard it is to find a PLAIN white/off white tshirt for a 4 year old little girl is? Walmart had ONE and it has a bow on the shoulder. Thankfully Bev didnt care or I would be figuring out how to take a bow off right now LOL. Its suppossed to be 50 and shes Belle so shes in a sleeveless ball gown
It really does for him. He wont let me tell anyone we really KNOW either so I have to do it even with our friends or sit back and watch him get frustrated by it which hurts me to see that.
It really does for him. He wont let me tell anyone we really KNOW either so I have to do it even with our friends or sit back and watch him get frustrated by it which hurts me to see that.
We are taking Clive this year. Although I think that, unless we keep friends company while their kids trick or treat, we'll probably just take him to a trunk or treat event since he's just nearly two, so walking from house to house is a bit much, especially in chaos. We know he won't eat a ton of the candy, and we'll give the toddler inappropriate stuff to other kids. (he can have suckers and such...spaced out, obviously) It's mainly to let him get out and about in a cute costume..he likes being involved with other kids. Thank You is not in his vocabulary yet. However, I'll do the 'say thank you' anyway, since we're teaching him the appropriate times to say it so that, when it IS in his vocabulary, it will hopefully be habit.
I never do candy at home as no one wants to hear 6 barking dogs....And, I'm in a 'not the greatest' neighborhood that has no streetlights, so I'm pretty certain everyone with kids here takes their kids elsewhere.
I never do candy at home as no one wants to hear 6 barking dogs....And, I'm in a 'not the greatest' neighborhood that has no streetlights, so I'm pretty certain everyone with kids here takes their kids elsewhere.
I use to be like that but I finally broke down when I started hanging out at my friends houses :/
I finally had to just sit down and say 'I need you to tell me when to leave. I won't be offended I just don't know when to leave. I don't know if it's so early it's rude or too late and I'm overstaying my welcome'.
I finally had to just sit down and say 'I need you to tell me when to leave. I won't be offended I just don't know when to leave. I don't know if it's so early it's rude or too late and I'm overstaying my welcome'.
I cant wait for him to get to that point honestly. I have to watch what I say. I think its because he JUST really found out this summer so its so new to him.
His mom told him about 2 years ago but shes nuts and the circumstances made us disbelieve her. So he is still trying to understand and I geuss process it.
His mom told him about 2 years ago but shes nuts and the circumstances made us disbelieve her. So he is still trying to understand and I geuss process it.
I expect you've thought out a million scenarios during those sleepless nights, and I of course don't have any real understanding of Morgan's issues, but I'm wondering if this would work.
Can your friend and the two older kids go up to the door first, while you and Morgan follow more slowly? That way when the person comes to the door, your friend can say "Oh, we've got one more coming up here! He doesn't talk, but he's really excited for trick or treating!". I know in the perfect world you wouldn't have to have someone explain, but I know if I had a heads up like that, I'd be very happy to just smile and wish him a Happy Halloween.
I hope things go better than you expect and you and the kids are able to have a good time.
Can your friend and the two older kids go up to the door first, while you and Morgan follow more slowly? That way when the person comes to the door, your friend can say "Oh, we've got one more coming up here! He doesn't talk, but he's really excited for trick or treating!". I know in the perfect world you wouldn't have to have someone explain, but I know if I had a heads up like that, I'd be very happy to just smile and wish him a Happy Halloween.
I hope things go better than you expect and you and the kids are able to have a good time.
It's really hard. I've always had to do it but I was pretty recently diagnosed with Aspergers. I mean now I have a name to use for it. But even though it's something I've always had to do it was hard to come to terms with.
I use to do the same thing. I just didn't know how to bring up the 'I want to go home' feeling.
My friends and I have everything down pretty well now. They know I stay up pretty late so they'll start getting ready for bed and I know it's time to start getting ready to leave. I'll help clean up and leave then. It's not so awkward now that there's kind of a scripted 'end of hang out time' thing now.
I use to do the same thing. I just didn't know how to bring up the 'I want to go home' feeling.
My friends and I have everything down pretty well now. They know I stay up pretty late so they'll start getting ready for bed and I know it's time to start getting ready to leave. I'll help clean up and leave then. It's not so awkward now that there's kind of a scripted 'end of hang out time' thing now.
I was always scared to even knock on the door! I'd then run off in fear half the time. People probably thought I was nuts. I'd sneak in between other kids and not have to talk to people. The fact I turned into a good public speaker is beyond me!
I don't think they should expect to much of young kids! Wth! The few times I passed out I smiled and said hello or just left it on the porch.
Is he autistic? I thought he was still really young? I know we just had a big autism awareness thing a worker from the county and they said with things like Halloween or other over stimulating things(even like a store depending on the kid) they should have the autism sleeve or pull chain on a jacket. They even make the kids here tattoos with names and phone numbers to rub on their arms in case they get over stimulated and run away. Other than ID for safety I don't think it's necessarily anyone's business though.
I don't think they should expect to much of young kids! Wth! The few times I passed out I smiled and said hello or just left it on the porch.
Is he autistic? I thought he was still really young? I know we just had a big autism awareness thing a worker from the county and they said with things like Halloween or other over stimulating things(even like a store depending on the kid) they should have the autism sleeve or pull chain on a jacket. They even make the kids here tattoos with names and phone numbers to rub on their arms in case they get over stimulated and run away. Other than ID for safety I don't think it's necessarily anyone's business though.
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Alright, what I'm wondering here:
Isn't Morgan TWO? Do people have any concept of how many two years olds, especially boys, are still nonverbal? Or at least way too shy to say anything to a stranger? What kind of sociopath gets angry at a TODDLER for not saying "thank you"?
If he was school age, I could understand a little more if people asked him themselves to say "thank you".
Also, at this age he is too young, but maybe in a few years (if he still has trouble speaking to strangers) you could give him a small sign that says "thank you" to hold up after the people give him his candy? That is probably what I would do if I had a nonverbal child and they were going somewhere they were expected to repeat a phrase over and over.
Isn't Morgan TWO? Do people have any concept of how many two years olds, especially boys, are still nonverbal? Or at least way too shy to say anything to a stranger? What kind of sociopath gets angry at a TODDLER for not saying "thank you"?
If he was school age, I could understand a little more if people asked him themselves to say "thank you".
Also, at this age he is too young, but maybe in a few years (if he still has trouble speaking to strangers) you could give him a small sign that says "thank you" to hold up after the people give him his candy? That is probably what I would do if I had a nonverbal child and they were going somewhere they were expected to repeat a phrase over and over.
While this might work for some kids for me the issue wasn't saying thank you *well yeah I guess it kind of was*. It was I didn't want attention on just me. Maybe pin something with a name and says thank you or maybe put thank you on the side of the bag that the person giving candy out sees.
Making me have to hold up a sign to someone to draw attention was just as bad as forcing me to talk to them.
Making me have to hold up a sign to someone to draw attention was just as bad as forcing me to talk to them.
S
I have all the patience in the world for the kids. I get it. Halloween can be a pretty overstimulating holiday, even for "normal" kids, much less kids with special needs. Some of the most polite kids will completely and innocently forget to say thank you sometimes. Sometimes, the parents are standing on the sidewalk rather than being right there to say thank you because they're trying to let their kids be more independent. And sometimes, the kid is socially impaired for one reason or another. So long as the person is polite (read, not being obviously and intentionally rude), it doesn't bother me if they don't or can not say thank you, and I pretty much give candy out to anyone who shows up and isn't an ass...
...but to those who are, I have an extra special treat.
I keep a bucket of ice cubes handy for those...lovely individuals...who make a point of being nasty, entitled little pricks. No, I don't dump the bucket on them (though that's been tempting). You see, when you reach into a bucket of ice cubes, it sounds like you're grabbing a fist full of candy. And when you plunk it into their pillow case, it still sounds like a fist full of candy. They don't know what hit them until they go to check out their "haul" and find half of their candy sopping wet.
I have another bucket especially for the parents who trick or treat with their babies. It contains stickers.
...but to those who are, I have an extra special treat.
I keep a bucket of ice cubes handy for those...lovely individuals...who make a point of being nasty, entitled little pricks. No, I don't dump the bucket on them (though that's been tempting). You see, when you reach into a bucket of ice cubes, it sounds like you're grabbing a fist full of candy. And when you plunk it into their pillow case, it still sounds like a fist full of candy. They don't know what hit them until they go to check out their "haul" and find half of their candy sopping wet.
I have another bucket especially for the parents who trick or treat with their babies. It contains stickers.
I didnt think about that! Her and I had a little talk today and shes like relax we will figure it out. Thankfully shes been around him enough she understands how he is. I dont know what I would do without her in this place honestly <3.
Hes always had issues but I think for him its more the I'm not normal because he honestly never thought they were problems until I pointed things out to him.
He is. Hes 28 mths. I havent gone that far because I can catch him before he gets away from me LMAO.
Im hoping we will find a communication tool that works for him when we get to his therapist. *fingers crossed* So hopefully next year we will have a system to use but yes hes two and its really frustrating. I get flack for everything where hes concerened because he LOOKS 3 but hes 2 and hes not even developmentally 2.
Hes always had issues but I think for him its more the I'm not normal because he honestly never thought they were problems until I pointed things out to him.
He is. Hes 28 mths. I havent gone that far because I can catch him before he gets away from me LMAO.
Im hoping we will find a communication tool that works for him when we get to his therapist. *fingers crossed* So hopefully next year we will have a system to use but yes hes two and its really frustrating. I get flack for everything where hes concerened because he LOOKS 3 but hes 2 and hes not even developmentally 2.
I have all the patience in the world for the kids. I get it. Halloween can be a pretty overstimulating holiday, even for "normal" kids, much less kids with special needs. Some of the most polite kids will completely and innocently forget to say thank you sometimes. Sometimes, the parents are standing on the sidewalk rather than being right there to say thank you because they're trying to let their kids be more independent. And sometimes, the kid is socially impaired for one reason or another. So long as the person is polite (read, not being obviously and intentionally rude), it doesn't bother me if they don't or can not say thank you, and I pretty much give candy out to anyone who shows up and isn't an ass...
...but to those who are, I have an extra special treat.
I keep a bucket of ice cubes handy for those...lovely individuals...who make a point of being nasty, entitled little pricks. No, I don't dump the bucket on them (though that's been tempting). You see, when you reach into a bucket of ice cubes, it sounds like you're grabbing a fist full of candy. And when you plunk it into their pillow case, it still sounds like a fist full of candy. They don't know what hit them until they go to check out their "haul" and find half of their candy sopping wet.
I have another bucket especially for the parents who trick or treat with their babies. It contains stickers.
...but to those who are, I have an extra special treat.
I keep a bucket of ice cubes handy for those...lovely individuals...who make a point of being nasty, entitled little pricks. No, I don't dump the bucket on them (though that's been tempting). You see, when you reach into a bucket of ice cubes, it sounds like you're grabbing a fist full of candy. And when you plunk it into their pillow case, it still sounds like a fist full of candy. They don't know what hit them until they go to check out their "haul" and find half of their candy sopping wet.
I have another bucket especially for the parents who trick or treat with their babies. It contains stickers.
He is really young still.
I'd flat out tell people to shove it at this point. My friend just took her three year old to a speech therapist because her MIL demanded it even though she understood him fine. A aunt in the family said he would be doomed for life if he didn't get immediate help. Speech therapist said he was fine and some kids are just slower than others and he is actually really good with all the skills and she can just work with him at home on pronouncing some stuff. MIL sounded mad the poor kids wasn't going to be in a monitored program
If people give you looks give it right back. But I don't think you should get them at such a young age. I know my friend would just say it for him and have him wave last year.
I'd flat out tell people to shove it at this point. My friend just took her three year old to a speech therapist because her MIL demanded it even though she understood him fine. A aunt in the family said he would be doomed for life if he didn't get immediate help. Speech therapist said he was fine and some kids are just slower than others and he is actually really good with all the skills and she can just work with him at home on pronouncing some stuff. MIL sounded mad the poor kids wasn't going to be in a monitored program
If people give you looks give it right back. But I don't think you should get them at such a young age. I know my friend would just say it for him and have him wave last year.
He is really young still.
I'd flat out tell people to shove it at this point. My friend just took her three year old to a speech therapist because her MIL demanded it even though she understood him fine. A aunt in the family said he would be doomed for life if he didn't get immediate help. Speech therapist said he was fine and some kids are just slower than others and he is actually really good with all the skills and she can just work with him at home on pronouncing some stuff. MIL sounded mad the poor kids wasn't going to be in a monitored program
If people give you looks give it right back. But I don't think you should get them at such a young age. I know my friend would just say it for him and have him wave last year.
I'd flat out tell people to shove it at this point. My friend just took her three year old to a speech therapist because her MIL demanded it even though she understood him fine. A aunt in the family said he would be doomed for life if he didn't get immediate help. Speech therapist said he was fine and some kids are just slower than others and he is actually really good with all the skills and she can just work with him at home on pronouncing some stuff. MIL sounded mad the poor kids wasn't going to be in a monitored program
If people give you looks give it right back. But I don't think you should get them at such a young age. I know my friend would just say it for him and have him wave last year.
So we are wondering if its because he doesnt react at ALL.