So cruelty is OK, as long as it's for religious reasons
- Thread starter Gempress
- Start date
No, then I just think that they are sad and pathetic individuals.
But, the problem is that kids live in the now and don't seem to get that. It's all about what is happening today and they have no concept of the future. I was bullied terribly in school. My self esteem was dirt, and I was miserable. I wish I could bottle what I know now and send it back to my teen self. Most of the people who bullied me are such sad creatures now. The other day one of the mean girls from high school waited on me at a fast food place. That's the one with a job :rofl1:
But, adults told me the same thing when I was a kid. If only they would hear it and take it to heart.
It may be different but there's absolutely nothing wrong with comparing it. People have been hurt and killed themselves over stuff people have said and done on the internet. Bullying is bullying no matter where it occurs.
Beating somebody up after school every day is not the same as verbally tormenting somebody, either, but both are still bullying. And it's definitely not right to start claiming if it's better to be punched in the face or have somebody say terrible things, not right to say it's better to be bullied face to face or online. Sort of a personal, individual thing.
Bullying comes in many forms. I don't think it has to be repetitive to count as bullying, I think you can bully someone in a singular incident. Like there's bullying for the sake of bullying and then there's bullying somebody to get what you want... obviously bullying somebody to get what you want is quite a bit different than the kid who throws rocks at another kid every day on his walk home from school, but from a linguistic standpoint, both are "bullying." I also don't think the expectation of retaliation has anything to do with it. I would say people are LESS LIKELY to bully when they think they will be retaliated against - just like people are less likely to talk ($@* face to face but run their mouths on the internet when they have the power of anonymity behind them - but if you do or don't expect someone to retaliate is not the defining point of bullying or not bullying.
Beating somebody up after school every day is not the same as verbally tormenting somebody, either, but both are still bullying. And it's definitely not right to start claiming if it's better to be punched in the face or have somebody say terrible things, not right to say it's better to be bullied face to face or online. Sort of a personal, individual thing.
Bullying comes in many forms. I don't think it has to be repetitive to count as bullying, I think you can bully someone in a singular incident. Like there's bullying for the sake of bullying and then there's bullying somebody to get what you want... obviously bullying somebody to get what you want is quite a bit different than the kid who throws rocks at another kid every day on his walk home from school, but from a linguistic standpoint, both are "bullying." I also don't think the expectation of retaliation has anything to do with it. I would say people are LESS LIKELY to bully when they think they will be retaliated against - just like people are less likely to talk ($@* face to face but run their mouths on the internet when they have the power of anonymity behind them - but if you do or don't expect someone to retaliate is not the defining point of bullying or not bullying.
Please stop talking to me like I am an idiot. I get it, you think you are smarter than I am. I get that in just about every conversation we have. Maybe you are but good grief.
I actually totally disagree. I think you can still be a bully even when someone fights back. I don't think the recipient has to be weak in order for someone to be a bully. Do you think homosexuals are weak? Unable to fight off bullies? I don't believe the act changes just because someone fights back. I remember a thread on chaz years ago about bullying and a young member said she fought back all the time but it just made things worse. To me a bully is a bully no matter the reaction of the target
I actually totally disagree. I think you can still be a bully even when someone fights back. I don't think the recipient has to be weak in order for someone to be a bully. Do you think homosexuals are weak? Unable to fight off bullies? I don't believe the act changes just because someone fights back. I remember a thread on chaz years ago about bullying and a young member said she fought back all the time but it just made things worse. To me a bully is a bully no matter the reaction of the target
GOOD POST
I agree with everything you said here. I guess bullies can take many forms and there really isn't a definitive answer to it but I do wish schools would take a stronger stand on bullying (and the law for that matter when one teports harrassment online and in person). You seem to hear so many stories of parents going to the ends of the earth with schools to stop the torment but to no avail
I agree with everything you said here. I guess bullies can take many forms and there really isn't a definitive answer to it but I do wish schools would take a stronger stand on bullying (and the law for that matter when one teports harrassment online and in person). You seem to hear so many stories of parents going to the ends of the earth with schools to stop the torment but to no avail
Oy
I am ashamed to say I live in this state. Bullying is bullying no matter how its done and who does it. Just because its done because of a belief does not make it ok.
And to me stating an opinion that may or may not agree with someone else. And depending on HOW you state your opinion can be considered bullying. You don't have to be mean to someone to state your opinion.
I am ashamed to say I live in this state. Bullying is bullying no matter how its done and who does it. Just because its done because of a belief does not make it ok. And to me stating an opinion that may or may not agree with someone else. And depending on HOW you state your opinion can be considered bullying. You don't have to be mean to someone to state your opinion.
I've probably found myself taking up for at least as many people I didn't particularly agree with -- or sometimes even LIKE -- as I have those I did. And I've taken plenty of sh1t for it here on several occasions.
And no, Sparks, I don't think you're an idiot or anything like and not having the same point of view has nothing to do with whether I think you're "smart" or not. It's just a different point of view. If you want to read things into it to be offended I can't stop you; it's your prerogative.
And no, Sparks, I don't think you're an idiot or anything like and not having the same point of view has nothing to do with whether I think you're "smart" or not. It's just a different point of view. If you want to read things into it to be offended I can't stop you; it's your prerogative.
bullying is bullying no matter what...
whether its the kid getting beat up at school everyday or its the person posting behind a screenname that makes mean and snide remarks to the same person over and over again...
I've been on both ends, and in the past year I guess I've "grown up" and don't need to make sarcastic snide remarks anymore, I will say my piece but I refuse to let myself to get to the point where Im just being mean for the hell of it...
whether its the kid getting beat up at school everyday or its the person posting behind a screenname that makes mean and snide remarks to the same person over and over again...
I've been on both ends, and in the past year I guess I've "grown up" and don't need to make sarcastic snide remarks anymore, I will say my piece but I refuse to let myself to get to the point where Im just being mean for the hell of it...
And I've seen people bully people they don't like and laugh about it amongst themselves, then cry "WAH! BULLYING! MEAN!" when it's somebody they do like. It's happened here on several occasions, by mods no less, who slap each other on the back and congratulate each other for bullying somebody who deserves it. In fact I don't think it's unreasonable to say it's board culture to bully somebody people deem a troll. It's a troll so it's okay... they deserve it!
So because you personally feel you've stood up for people you don't like, you honestly think it negates my point about the approach to what's bullying and what's okay because it's "deserved" in general? Even Mother Theresa didn't negate the cruel and horrible things the majority of mankind does, so I don't think we can apply that kind of logic here either.
So because you personally feel you've stood up for people you don't like, you honestly think it negates my point about the approach to what's bullying and what's okay because it's "deserved" in general? Even Mother Theresa didn't negate the cruel and horrible things the majority of mankind does, so I don't think we can apply that kind of logic here either.
The reason it's not the same is because in person, when I was bullied in school, I couldn't just exit. I had to take it. I had to face those people every single day.
Nobody forces you to read forum posts. Especially something as obscure as a dog forum of all places. While I understand that direct cyber-bullying is a problem, it is only a problem when it is, again, *direct*. Personal emails, facebook posts, things like that that are sent to the person. Not posts on a forum. It's not the same. Nobody has to read the opinions of other people on the internet, people that aren't even talking to them and have no impact on their lives. That's not bullying, in my opinion. And that's coming from someone who was fairly heavily bullied, both offline in school, and online directly.
At that point, you are breaching into an area that absolutely cannot be policed and there is no reason to argue about it.
Nobody forces you to read forum posts. Especially something as obscure as a dog forum of all places. While I understand that direct cyber-bullying is a problem, it is only a problem when it is, again, *direct*. Personal emails, facebook posts, things like that that are sent to the person. Not posts on a forum. It's not the same. Nobody has to read the opinions of other people on the internet, people that aren't even talking to them and have no impact on their lives. That's not bullying, in my opinion. And that's coming from someone who was fairly heavily bullied, both offline in school, and online directly.
At that point, you are breaching into an area that absolutely cannot be policed and there is no reason to argue about it.
Honestly though, we are all getting off track. This isn't about what is or isn't bullying. To know that, just look at the kids. This is about using religion as a crutch, which is absolutely ridiculous and unacceptable. There is no excuse in the world for bullying a kid in school based on their sexuality, beliefs, whatever, to the point of self-mutilation or even suicide. Perhaps the reason we have such a hard time with solving these issues is because the conversations end up falling apart into heated debates and hair splitting. There's got to be a better way.
not to defend bullies, but instead we (as a whole) need to find out the question WHY are these people being bullies? I would venture a guess and say that for some bullies there is an underlying issue for why they are acting out.. I have a VERY hard time in believing that some people just like being mean hateful and hurting just for the hell of it, but maybe Im just being naive..
FTR I think hiding behind religion as an excuse for bullying is sickening..
FTR I think hiding behind religion as an excuse for bullying is sickening..