It's been a year...

Discussion in 'Rainbow Bridge - Dog Memorials' started by Juicy, Feb 15, 2009.

  1. Juicy

    Juicy New Member

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    Since I was able to open the backdoor and see her walk out :( She's not by my side every night when I go to sleep, licking me till she goes to sleep.

    I've had many sleepless night, but this christmas it really sunk in, she' gone. I had dreams where I wish I would wish I never did wake up, because she was alive in these drems.

    She was one of those evil yappy dogs. But to me she was the best dog, ever. I always questioned the future, if she would get along with my future kids, but now I'll never know.

    I wish she died a natural death and instead of telling people about her, they would of known her and why we shared that bond we did. I hate using past terms, she was, she did, I want it to be like before.

    I'm so thankful for dog forums, because there are people that do care bout her, even though they've never met her. I hate thinking am I the only one who cares that she's gone? No one felt bad for her, they felt bad for me, but not for her, because in their eyes 'she was just a dog'. My friends try to understand, but they can't fully understand how much she meant to me.

    She wasn't special to most people, or a favorite or no sort, but to me she was and much more.

    I really hope and pray animals do have souls, because there is no heaven to me, if I cannot see Didi again. One year before she passed her previous owner was murdered, if she cared for her like I did, I hope they're taking care of one another and I get the chance to see her again.

    I hope now Lucky and the puppies have some more company from her presence, even if she' being a total bitch.


    I LOVE YOU, I MISS YOU, RIP DIDI.

    [​IMG]
     
  2. Doberluv

    Doberluv Active Member

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    This is not good writing, but your post made so much sense to me, I can really relate and felt similarly in the past and that's where this comes from.


    It’s Only a Dog
    I’ve heard it said so many times, “It’s only a dog.”
    When you loose your pet, there’s someone who says, “It’s only a dog.”
    Words or thoughts, it doesn’t much matter, don’t let anyone block your grieving…
    they don’t understand what you’re feeling.
    Surround yourself with real friends who take care of you…
    who let you feel what you feel without judging or invalidating you.

    To some, it’s true, it’s only a dog and it’s just too bad.
    For dogs that are family, the love of our lives, it’s much more sad.
    It is hard, it is wicked, it takes it’s toll.
    People bustle round while we bury our soul.
    You’ve got to go about it the best that you can. Don’t stuff it, don’t hide it and don‘t turn your back.
    What outlet you find, nurture yourself….take your time.
     
  3. Doberluv

    Doberluv Active Member

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    I don't know if these would help you or just make you sadder. http://www.chazhound.com/forums/t87576/ But I think it really helps to know you're not alone and most of us share the same kinds of emotions. The dreams.....how the dreams can get to you. I had dreams in my sleep and when I was awake. The acceptance.....such a hard thing to take in. It's like two opposing forces pulling you apart every minute. But everything I hear from people who are missing their dogs or still in grief I can so relate to. And these emotions are where these poems come from.
     
  4. Juicy

    Juicy New Member

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    Thank you for that, sometimes I feel guilty that I've cried more for my dogs than I have for people that have passed on in my life, but you're right the pain does ease. The pain of losing Lucky has gone away, I still think about him, but I don't burst into tears or have sleepless nights about him. So sorry about your Lyric, what a special dog to inspire you to write those!
     
  5. Doberluv

    Doberluv Active Member

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    Yes, he was a very special dog to me....we were so bonded. And I hardly knew what I was writing when I wrote those, I was sobbing so much I couldn't see what I was writing. LOL. But I just felt like I had to get it out.

    I know that guilt feeling you're talking about for crying more sometimes for our dogs than even a family member....or some family members. I thought I was abnormal, but lately I've been hearing similar stories. I guess because we live with these guys and they're such a constant in our lives. We live and breathe together every day.

    It's been a little over a year for me too since losing Lyric. He was only 4. I think I feel like you do about Didi. The intense pain is fading but I still think about him almost every day and miss him and his ways a lot. I wish he didn't go away. And I do cry about it sometimes but not as much. I think if there is an after life, it wouldn't be just reserved for humans. That just wouldn't do. These precious gifts....if they were here for us now, they'll be there for us later.
     
  6. Juicy

    Juicy New Member

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    I couldn't get myself to write if I were crying! I wrote when I ws ok nd redy, but I must dmit when I ws crying I hd better thoughts nd better tribute of wht I ws going to write nd when it cme to writing when I ws redy to write!

    But I bet those were some gret four yers. I lwys felt bd tht she didn't lived up to 18+ yers like how other smller dogs do, but then I think its bout qulity not quantity. Some people think hving her for 8 yers is a long time! I don't!! Because I knew she could of outlived more than 8! But then again, even if she lived up to 20, I still would of missed her the same, possibly even more!

    Your last sentences made me think of this quote of which I like a lot.

    ''God puts dogs on earth for a short time so they can fufill the part of the heart that's only reserved for a true companion.''
     
  7. bubbatd

    bubbatd Moderator

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    We never forget ...... thank Heavens !!
     
  8. Doberluv

    Doberluv Active Member

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    I like that too.

    Well, you must have been hit hard too because little dogs are "suppose" to live longer. What a shame.

    I guess I'm selfish. It's about quality. But it's also about quantity, especially when quality is present and I felt and feel ripped off. :(
     
  9. Anniversaries are hard, especially the first few.

    (((hugs)))
     
  10. Juicy

    Juicy New Member

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    Thanks everyone. (((hugs)))
     
  11. Juicy

    Juicy New Member

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    Grr sorry about the typos, I didn't even notice my 'a' wasn't working.

    But yeah I know the feeling :(
     

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