IF a middle school councilor

puppydog

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The man issue is because a man is more intimidating then a woman. He is bigger, has a deeper voice and is generally perceived as stronger, especially to a little girl. A man using intimidation tactics on a little girl IS scarier then a woman doing it.
 

Dizzy

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This whole argument revolves around people being ok with being touched. What makes you assume the people you touch are also ok with it??

Yes, ive hugged clients, yes I've had kids jumping all over me. Hell, i was putting one on the naughty spot just tonight.

I ALWAYS ask permission to touch someone. In the case of the child tonight i asked the mother (hes 3...). Unless its a casual situation and they instigate. No part of the OP felt comfortable to me.
 

Dizzy

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You kmow, for me its not even about professionalism or being accountable, its just respectful. I also know kids that would rather punch you than ask you to stop touching them. And yes, some have told me they dont appreciate being hugged etc.

I appreciate people who respect my space. Once you're invited in, then game on. till then, hands off.
 

smkie

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She came home today saying he apologized., I imagine, for all of it.
 
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my point is sexual bias is oozing from this thread, even when stated bluntly by those saying it's not their reasoning.
Honestly I think you're projecting on some of the people in this thread.

a touch on the knee isn't really a big deal when it's used in a way to say "hey, this is serious business, what's going on" same as a touch on the elbow, shoulder, arm etc.
To whom? You? Me? Everyone? No one?


I think those sorts of touches are important and a big part of human communication and people are so afraid of the boogie man it's all getting tossed away. People can't touch anybody anymore for anything or the boogie man comes out. Teachers can't touch kids, couselors won't touch patients, doctors are now being asked again to be human with patients in some places, in others, they're still scared of the boogie man and dont' want any of it.

so far all we're ending up with is a large population that doesn't know how to deal with normal human contact. Interpersonal relationships certainly aren't any better. Professional contact whether between adults or kids certainly isn't on a upward trend and I'd have to say people's behavior in general isn't really all that stellar.
I'm just gonna quote myself here instead of re-typing it... except to add/emphasize... IT'S OK to have a bubble and doesn't mean you want a sterile, non-touching world or have any sort of pathological aversion to touch.

There's a false dichotomy that keeps being brought up in this thread: That is, that one either wants a sterile, no-touching world OR wants a world full of hugs and rainbows. And it's really annoying me. It is perfectly possible for someone to simply be discriminating about personal boundaries and without being pathologically aversive to touch or paranoid. The sky isn't falling. The slope isn't slippery. Some people just don't welcome anyone and everyone inside their bubble simply by virtue of being human.
 

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