How to Communicate Peacefully-A Tutorial

Discussion in 'Buried Bones' started by tessa_s212, May 26, 2006.

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  1. tessa_s212

    tessa_s212 Guest

    It seems every now and then we have quite a few fights and/or rude comments thrown around on Chaz. I do really enjoy this forum, and would like to propose some recommendations for posting. :D If we all abide by the following steps, we can all have a happier place to discuss dogs.


    1. Clarify. If someone says something, make sure you understand it! Rather than jumping right on their backs, ask them if that’s what they mean.

    DON'T DO THIS:
    Member1: I don’t care for your dog.
    Member2: OH MY GOD HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT I HATE YOU

    WHAT YOU SHOULD DO:
    Member1: I don’t care for your dog.
    Member2: What do you mean? Is it his coat, his structure, his tempermant?
    Member1: Well his coat is pretty gross.
    Member2: He did blow coat earlier this month, there’s not much I can do about it.

    Please note the civilized manner the second conversation was carried out in, as compared to the first.


    2. Keep it private. Should someone blatantly attack you on a thread, don’t keep fighting there. Take it to personal messages quietly, and fight all you want there. Perfectly good threads have been ruined by arguments and grudges, and that should never happen.


    3. Don't use sarcasm. Don’t be snide, rude, inconsiderate or amazingly sarcastic. Simply state your side of an argument, and accept the fact that people will disagree with you. You can argue until you’re blue in the face, it will probably not change someone’s opinion. Remember – there is a difference between an argument and a debate.


    4. Don't hold grudges. Don’t bring up previous threads, arguments or statements. A discussion is for the topic on hand, not what someone said some other time. Do not bring in the person’s past, habits or actions from their personal life.


    5. Reread your posts. Never post anything without rereading it. Look at it from the perspective of an outsider. Does it make sense? Can it in any way be offensive? Many times a person means one thing, but it comes out very different. Thirty seconds to scan over a post will save hours of fighting.


    6. Don't take things personally. Odds are if you take something personally, it will get out of hand. Should someone say something you think is a direct attack, ask them exactly what they mean. If they are being rude, ignorant or offensive, either take the conversation to Personal Messages or report them to an Administrator.

    *by James
     
  2. JennSLK

    JennSLK F150 and a .30-06

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    thats just no fun ;)

    Your actually right with most of it
     
  3. TAVS

    TAVS New Member

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    Can't we use sarcasm and just put a :D after it?
     
  4. gaddylovesdogs

    gaddylovesdogs no touchy

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    *sniffle* Sarcasm is my best friend!! :(

    The large majority of your post I agree with though.
     
  5. Roxy's CD

    Roxy's CD New Member

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    I agree with not holding grudges fully!

    Differences aside you don't want to lose valuable information just because you two don't agree that black dogs are prettier than brown dogs (EX lol).
     
  6. JennSLK

    JennSLK F150 and a .30-06

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    :eek: How could you!! How dare you!!! OMG I so hate you now. Your on my ignore list!!!!

    ;) :D :p

    You know I luv ya
     
  7. RD

    RD Are you dead yet?

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    B-but.. it's all I've got!
     
  8. Renee750il

    Renee750il Felurian

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    Okay! I moved this thread, copied this thread and stickied this thread . . . Need I say more? :)
     
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