Hi Gang! (long, rambling, midly entertaining)

Discussion in 'Dogs - General Dog Chat' started by ButtGumbo, Feb 16, 2005.

  1. ButtGumbo

    ButtGumbo Ass Lover

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2004
    Messages:
    185
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    4 cats, 1 Mule, 1 Dog
    Location:
    SW Ohio
    Hi guys! You probably thought I dropped off the face of the earth, but I assure you that I check out the (many) picture postings that I get e-mailed about. Constantly. All day. Every day! :D

    Truth is, I had a new job that was keeping me away from the 'puter for the most part. That job sucked. Now I have a new new job that ROCKS, yet I'm so busy I can't really spend any time during the day surfing the Interweb.

    Updates:

    My new job rocks. I'm finally gonna be making large amounts of money so I can actually afford the dog-gone Innova food my animals are now addicted to. Thanks Renee...I'm eating friggin' ramen noodles and choking down Milwakee's Best while my animals get their equivilent of filet mignon every day. :mad: :D

    Wifes good. Kid's good...so smart he scares me.

    Josie the Wonderdog update:

    My dog is a complete dufus. You know how they say that mutts are the best dogs...smarter, friendlier, better behaved?










    LIES!!!!







    Josie is terrible. The infamous Gato-Canine wars at chez Gumbo are raging in epic proportions. Josie's favorite pastime is to sneak into the bedroom and crawl all the way under the bed to harrass the poor cats, who have basically taken up residence under there until they hear the *clink-clink* of her night cage being latched. Normally docile Audrey the Grouch is the only tactile combatant. When Josie tries to herd her she transforms into a cross between Satan and Tonya Harding. Ears flat. On haunches. Fluffed up. She's a hissing, spitting, growling, clawing, incarnation of the feline devil. For whatever reason, this encounter normally takes place in my recently remodeled dining room, repleat with new laminate floor, so that there are protracted noisy instances of skidding, sliding and general wall-smashing.

    My 3 YO finds it utterly hilarious. He also scolds me when I mutter "stupid *%$@# dog" after she does something stupid like:

    * Eating an entire roll of toilet paper
    * Eating the left wing off of a plush penguin
    * Dragging an empty can of ravioli out of the bottom of a full trash bin
    * Licking the bottom of the shower (gross)
    * Eating an entire doormat (WTH?)
    * Chewing up black baseball hats. ONLY black ones.
    * Dragging dirty socks out of the laundry bins. ONLY dirty ones.

    Thank God she's friggin' cute. That's all I can say. She's sweet too as long as she isn't overstimulated. I gotta love her. **sigh** .

    I had the wife cracking up tonight as we were watching the Dog Show on TV. Josie was chasing her tail (as usual) and I said they should have a mutt dog show...The Possum Holler Kennel Club Dawg Show, Pancake Dinner, and Swap Meet.

    I was mocking the commentator's voice saying:

    "Here we have a perenial crowd favorite from semi-rural Ohio: Josie the Wonderdog handled by functional alcoholic and reformed cat hater Mr. Gumbo, of Gaptooth, Ohio. Josie is a rare and highly sought after breed of indeterminate origin known as the Austrailianbordershibweiler. The breed's roots trace back to a trailer park near a 7/11 in central Ohio sometime between 1998 and 2001. This breed exhibits no discernable usuable qualities other than a high cuteness factor and a strong desire to eat cat turds. Their main strengths lie in tail chasing and cat herding, which makes them particularly suitable for exasperated middle managers in dead end careers. A breeder directory can be obtained by calling the Do-Drop Inn Tavern & Bait Shop in Sweatcreek, Ohio between the hours of 4-6 p.m. Monday thru Thursday (except for Tuesdays (bingo night) and Wednesdays (bowlin'). Ask for Skeeter."

    Anyway...things are cool.

    I want another dog. Maybe Josie is just lonely because the cats despise her. Hell, I've got the room.

    I want something obscure. I'm thinking about trying to get an Otterhound or a Glen of Imaal Terrier. Those dogs are super cool.

    I'll try and post more often. I miss you guys.

    -BG
     
  2. Debi

    Debi Moderator

    Joined:
    May 19, 2004
    Messages:
    15,731
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I'm laughing so hard........MISSED YOU BG!!!! Here I am...it's 4:15 AM, just got up, have the first cup of coffee in hand....groggie (but of course, at the computer) and your post just cracked me up...what a great way to start the day! :D :D :D
     
  3. Renee750il

    Renee750il Felurian

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2003
    Messages:
    94,266
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Occupation:
    3, Bimmer, GSDX (m); Kharma, Fila Brasileiro (f);
    Location:
    Where the selas blooms
    Home Page:
    MISSED YOU!

    Glad the new job rocks - and pays! That always helps.

    I'm doing the same thing food-wise, BG. I've half-jokingly considered going on Innova myself, lol. Maybe the morning bowl with some organic whole milk . . .

    But I thought Tuesday was darts night??? :p
     
  4. ButtGumbo

    ButtGumbo Ass Lover

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2004
    Messages:
    185
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    4 cats, 1 Mule, 1 Dog
    Location:
    SW Ohio
    Monday is dart night. :beer:

    :)
     
  5. Renee750il

    Renee750il Felurian

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2003
    Messages:
    94,266
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Occupation:
    3, Bimmer, GSDX (m); Kharma, Fila Brasileiro (f);
    Location:
    Where the selas blooms
    Home Page:
    Oh, yeah - that's right, lol! Well, I was close anyway.

    Maybe now with the new job you can upgrade the beer at least. :) Two things we always have here - Innova for the dogs and Negro Modela for us - gotta keep some standards! :eek:
     
  6. Debi

    Debi Moderator

    Joined:
    May 19, 2004
    Messages:
    15,731
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Hey BG...forgot to say CONGRATS on the new job!!!!! Ramen noodles....both my kids say NEVER again, it was the 'college' years food of choice. And, I remember Milwakee's Best.......how funny!! When we're having a hot dog dinner night, I never let Dave around when the dogs get fed....seeing a grown man drool is just too much for me.

    CONGRATS again!!!!
     
  7. smkie

    smkie pointer/labrador/terrier Staff Member

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2004
    Messages:
    55,145
    Likes Received:
    35
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Congrates on the good job..they sure are hard to find these days..lol on your posts too!
     
  8. Barb04

    Barb04 Love my pets Staff Member

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2004
    Messages:
    27,411
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Location:
    Tennessee
    ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!! Great commentary on Josie!!!!!!!!!!
     
  9. bogolove

    bogolove New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2004
    Messages:
    4,157
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    3 - 1 dog, and 2 cats
    Location:
    Tennessee
    Mildly entertaining? Come on, give yourself some credit. That was EXTREMELY entertaining! LOL!!!!

    Congrats on the new job!
     
  10. chazhound

    chazhound Alpha Dog Staff Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2003
    Messages:
    3,317
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    2 dogs
    Location:
    Florida
    Home Page:
    Can't believe I missed this thread!
    Congrats on the new job! Now you will have to work :)

    Chazhound
     

Share This Page