Help! Alone after a breakup with my dog!

Discussion in 'Member Introductions' started by TaylorB, Sep 25, 2013.

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  1. TaylorB

    TaylorB New Member

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    Hi there. I really am hoping to get some advice and help with Kaya, and figure out what to do. I say in advance that I know this is not a good situation, and would prefer constructive suggestions, not just getting upset.

    About four months ago, me and my then girlfriend adopted Kaya from a family moving to Australia, and could not take her with them. She has been with us since, and is now almost 15 months old. On top of having just gotten used to living in a different place (suburbs before, now living in the city), she is going to be having another change, as my girlfriend is out of the picture, and I am on my own with Kaya. I would have never gotten a dog on my own, but am now on my own with an amazing pet and friend, and don't know what will be best for her.

    For the past two weeks, I have taken her out for an hour before work, and two plus right after work, as well as a few more walks later after that, and has been ok for the most part, and hasnt displayed any huge changes in attitude. Work however, plus transit means shes on her own for 10 hours. I know this isnt ok. I am doing all that I can, and am looking into daycare for her as well, but the most I will be able to afford on my own will be three days a week, two days off with me, and two days on her own, or when I can manage it, a friend or someone from the community to walk her.

    I desperately want to keep her, and thus far has been ok on her own, but I really do want whats best for her, and I am worried that I can not provide what she needs. Please let me know what you may think, thought, options or just opinions. I will do what is best for her, and everything I can, I just dont know if I have to make the tough decision to find her a new home.

    Thanks for any help, I just want to get through this hard time, and get Kaya through ok too.
     
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  2. *blackrose

    *blackrose "I'm kupo for kupo nuts!"

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    Honestly....dogs are adaptable. And you being gone for 10 hours a day is pretty normal for the average working person who has to commute for their job. Although it isn't BEST to have your dog sit in a crate for 10 hours a day, especially without a potty break....it isn't bad, either, and that CERTAINLY shouldn't stop you from owning a dog.

    I am routinely gone at work for 8-10 hours a day. I have a 6.5 year old dog, and a 6 month old puppy. They're at home alone (and the pup is in a crate) during that time. I do have a friend stop by over her lunch to let them out to pee and stretch their legs when I work the 10+ hour days, but otherwise they just wait for me to get home.

    When my pup was a wee baby my fiance was home during the day and he was *maybe* crated for an hour or two if we had to run out for errands. Then, when he was around 14 weeks old, my fiance left for RTC. Abrams went from having a stay at home dad to only having me and staying in his crate for 10 hours a day with a potty break in the middle. He adapted perfectly, and he is a breed that most people would say would be impossible to own in an apartment, let alone in an apartment and working full time. But...he's doing just fine!

    So, if your girl can hold it during the day without any issues and you're able to provide her with the exercise she needs before/after you get home from work, then she's just fine staying with you. :) It's always nice to have someone able to stop by for a mid-day potty break/walk, and try to provide interactive toys for her in her crate (or room, or whatever you do with her when you're gone) so she can stay occupied while you're gone. (Although, honestly, she probably just sleeps!)
     
  3. release the hounds

    release the hounds Active Member

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    10 hours isn't ideal, it isn't a big deal either. As long as you're giving her good attention and interaction when you're with her, it shouldn't matter much.
     
  4. ruffiangirl

    ruffiangirl New Member

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    I agree with the others, it seems like you are on the right track with making sure she has lots of exercise before and after work. 10 hours isn't the worst for time spent alone, honestly, like other said, its pretty common, really. If you could get someone to let her out during the day that would be good, as well, but it wouldn't prevent me from keeping her if I couldn't.
     
  5. krissy

    krissy New Member

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    We all would obviously love to never leave our dogs for more than a couple of hours. That would be best. But it's unrealistic. I do know some people who have made it quite clear to me that they don't think people should get dogs if they can't be home with them all the time.... Well, we'd have a lot more homeless dogs if that was the case.

    When we just had Summit he would be home alone for 9+ hours. Now with the puppy and because I work so close to home I pop home at lunch for 1-2 hours to let them out, let them play, and maybe do a little bit of training. They do just fine. Do they prefer my days off when I spend most of my time with them? I'm sure they do, but I've left a webcam running in my bedroom while I was at work. Most boring video feed EVER. Both dogs sound asleep every single time I checked in on them. They sure seem upset that I'm gone! :rofl1:

    Is it ok to get a dog and NEVER spend time with it? No. If you're spending as much time with her as you can outside of work (and it sounds like you are) then I wouldn't sweat it. My dogs never go to day care or have someone in to see them (except me at lunch). I walk them in the morning. I play/train at lunch. And we do a variety of things after work. Sometimes we walk, sometimes we go trail jogging, sometimes we hike, train, visit friends, dog park. And then most nights I just hang out with them.

    Personally, I'd do what I could. I'd try to get someone in mid day to let her out if holding it that long is an issue. But otherwise if she was doing well I wouldn't get too worked up about it. But that's just me!
     
  6. TaylorB

    TaylorB New Member

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    I just wanted to thank all of you for your advice, and your personal stories. Kaya is a hugely important part of my life, and it's really comforting to know that I may be able to do this with her. It is very comforting to know I am doing the right things for her during a time when I am still hurting from a breakup. I'll be trying over the next couple months to see if she takes well to it, along with her daycare and walkers, so hopefully my next post will be a bit happier regarding Kaya!

    Thanks again.
     

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