A NEW BREED ~ DOG PEOPLE DOG PEOPLE: ...are a special breed not usually recognized by the AKC. ...think everyone has dog crates in their living room. ...have messy houses yet their kennels are spotless. ...can always find a show catalog from somewhere within arm's reach. ...have kids who know more about the "birds and the bees" when they're five than most people know when they are 40. ...drive trucks, vans, and station wagons especially equipped to haul dog crates. ...can never be reached on a weekend, they're usually at a dog show. ...will drive 400 miles, spend $100 on gas, $200 on a motel and $150 for meals to bring home a 35 cent ribbon. ...have kids who regard "bitch" as just another household word. ...have lush, green, beautiful back yards and they've never bought a bag of fertilizer. ...get up at 6 AM to walk the dogs, can be at ringside dressed to kill at 8 AM, but have trouble getting to work on time. ...will usually give up the $150,000 home in the suburbs to move to a shack on 10 acres so they can have a $150,000 kennel. ...never miss a closing date for entry fees, but pay the mortgage 10 days late. ...had rather be audited by the IRS than investigated by the AKC. ...use dog food bags for trash cans and 30 gallon trash cans for dog food. ...talk for hours on the phone to another dog person in a language known only to dog people. ...have parents who think they've lost their minds. ...have dog friends who think they are terrific. ...are crazy.