do "pretty"/"good looking" get treated different?
- Thread starter Dogdragoness
- Start date
I guess what everyone else's definition of it is. Cutting corners at work (I work with animals and that is a no no). Not showing up on time or when you are supposed to etc ... I also don't like people who dislike physical work and "getting their hands dirty", something I have been doing since I was old enough to hold tools.
:rofl1:
Can someone give me that for my birthday, please? It's so fitting.
Seriously - is saying that actually a thing? Because, wow. That seems like a ridiculous phrase to say to someone. I would trade my lows and highs in an instant to be completely fugly. I'd really rather be happy than be "pretty." **** pretty.
Thank you x2.
Can someone give me that for my birthday, please? It's so fitting.
Seriously - is saying that actually a thing? Because, wow. That seems like a ridiculous phrase to say to someone. I would trade my lows and highs in an instant to be completely fugly. I'd really rather be happy than be "pretty." **** pretty.
Thank you x2.
Gah. Okay, you guys win, I feel pretty <3 Just going to go bury my head in something now because of this ridiculous looking smile on my face 
That said, I feel like a solid 5 or 6 on a scale of 1-10 is still a great score! There are a lot of girls I see every day who are better looking than half the people around them, but maybe not as objectively beautiful as the other half. But I still see some of them as very pretty. Which also demonstrates that I definitely form my own opinions about a person's appearances (male or female), but I've never, ever let that affect how I treat them or how I see them as a person.
+1, definitely true and nice to see
LOL!! I love this.
That said, I feel like a solid 5 or 6 on a scale of 1-10 is still a great score! There are a lot of girls I see every day who are better looking than half the people around them, but maybe not as objectively beautiful as the other half. But I still see some of them as very pretty. Which also demonstrates that I definitely form my own opinions about a person's appearances (male or female), but I've never, ever let that affect how I treat them or how I see them as a person.
+1, definitely true and nice to see
LOL!! I love this.
(I have only read a few posts in this thread and skimmed the rest.)
I know I judge people. When you first meet someone, you judge them. Can't be helped. And how you treat them is based off of that initial judgement. (If you are a polite person, you just keep your opinion's to yourself and treat everyone equally...but not everyone is a polite person.)
I don't base my actions off of the attractiveness (or lack there of) of the person I'm interacting with, but they way they present themselves. Are their clothes clean and well put together? Do they look like (and/or smell like) they need to shower? Do they speak in actual sentences, with real words? Are they confident, or do they mumble and refuse to look at you?
But maybe that is a part of "looking good"? Presenting yourself well vs like you don't care? *shrugs* Physical attractiveness, after all, is so subjective.
I know I judge people. When you first meet someone, you judge them. Can't be helped. And how you treat them is based off of that initial judgement. (If you are a polite person, you just keep your opinion's to yourself and treat everyone equally...but not everyone is a polite person.)
I don't base my actions off of the attractiveness (or lack there of) of the person I'm interacting with, but they way they present themselves. Are their clothes clean and well put together? Do they look like (and/or smell like) they need to shower? Do they speak in actual sentences, with real words? Are they confident, or do they mumble and refuse to look at you?
But maybe that is a part of "looking good"? Presenting yourself well vs like you don't care? *shrugs* Physical attractiveness, after all, is so subjective.
I think that women do so much harm to other women... real women wear makeup, real women don't wear makeup, real women have curves, real women are tall and thin, real women should get dirty and work hard, real women should always look their best, etc, etc.
EVERY WOMAN IS A REAL WOMAN... it doesn't matter if you're feminine or tomboyish, or even if you were BORN a women or BECAME one later on (transgendered). If you identify with the female gender, you are a real woman.
Once we stop setting up EVERY woman to fail at being a "real woman," maybe we can move on from this.
Anyway, I definitely believe that "attractive" people are treated differently. I worked at Hollister for less than 2 weeks and had a major reality check on how people were treated. They had to have a certain amount of people for their weekly "group" interviews, and knew who would get a call back before they could even open their mouths.
I even encountered this in my professional life less than a month ago... and it makes me very sad.
Of course we all form first impressions of people... it's hard not to. I notice when someone is physically attractive from the very beginning, but there are SO many other things that make someone more or less attractive. Liking the same books, shows, hobbies... being well spoken, educated, etc, etc, etc... can make the ugliest person attractive!
EVERY WOMAN IS A REAL WOMAN... it doesn't matter if you're feminine or tomboyish, or even if you were BORN a women or BECAME one later on (transgendered). If you identify with the female gender, you are a real woman.
Once we stop setting up EVERY woman to fail at being a "real woman," maybe we can move on from this.
Anyway, I definitely believe that "attractive" people are treated differently. I worked at Hollister for less than 2 weeks and had a major reality check on how people were treated. They had to have a certain amount of people for their weekly "group" interviews, and knew who would get a call back before they could even open their mouths.
I even encountered this in my professional life less than a month ago... and it makes me very sad.
Of course we all form first impressions of people... it's hard not to. I notice when someone is physically attractive from the very beginning, but there are SO many other things that make someone more or less attractive. Liking the same books, shows, hobbies... being well spoken, educated, etc, etc, etc... can make the ugliest person attractive!
I'm pretty average looking but I have a cute dog and like to wear yoga pants alot which I think helps, people are usually pretty friendly to me lol I think a lot of it depends on natural type and there is some insecurity with not fitting the delicate kind of blonde white slender beauty standard but I've learned to kind of appreciate my self for what it is
That said, the me vs. PRETTY GIRLS WITH THE MAKEUP AND SKIRTS...is ridiculous.
I'm tired so have these tumblr educational graphics
Ayup. There's no "bad guy" except for the artificial objective standards of beauty and behavior.
And to be clear, I don't think there's some giant conspiracy that intentionally created them, I think they were just born because they have been so profitable to various industries and have become so entrenched in our collective psyches at this point to have taken on lives of their own.
Anyway, it's nice to see so many young women raging against it. Someday, maybe
And to be clear, I don't think there's some giant conspiracy that intentionally created them, I think they were just born because they have been so profitable to various industries and have become so entrenched in our collective psyches at this point to have taken on lives of their own.
Anyway, it's nice to see so many young women raging against it. Someday, maybe
Sure people get treated differently for different appearances and what not.
I'm not a super model but I'm not ugly. well not to me... everyone has a different definition of pretty and ugly. it's very subjective. I'm not pretty because I have the best figure or the greatest skin and Lord knows my hair is like an untamed beast and usually remains in a locked up state in an elastic band :rofl1: But I have a pretty smile and a genuine smile at that. I have a very inviting look to me. I have pretty eyes that reflect my smile. I can't say beyond regular high school catty nonsense that I've really had any trouble with people treating me poorly based on the way I look. People usually see me and want to strike up a conversation or tell me what's troubling them(seriously... this happens where ever I go lol). I should be a bartender :rofl1:
So while I may not have all the "conventional" good looks, I can't say that I get treated poorly because of it because I'm genuine (not to be confused with being REAL lol). I'm one of those people that hears "have we met before" or "do I know you from somewhere? you look really familiar" ALL the time. I always just laugh and say "I don't think so but I think I just have one of those faces"
I just have a friendly face and people respond to that with positivity normally
I'm not a super model but I'm not ugly. well not to me... everyone has a different definition of pretty and ugly. it's very subjective. I'm not pretty because I have the best figure or the greatest skin and Lord knows my hair is like an untamed beast and usually remains in a locked up state in an elastic band :rofl1: But I have a pretty smile and a genuine smile at that. I have a very inviting look to me. I have pretty eyes that reflect my smile. I can't say beyond regular high school catty nonsense that I've really had any trouble with people treating me poorly based on the way I look. People usually see me and want to strike up a conversation or tell me what's troubling them(seriously... this happens where ever I go lol). I should be a bartender :rofl1:
So while I may not have all the "conventional" good looks, I can't say that I get treated poorly because of it because I'm genuine (not to be confused with being REAL lol). I'm one of those people that hears "have we met before" or "do I know you from somewhere? you look really familiar" ALL the time. I always just laugh and say "I don't think so but I think I just have one of those faces"
I just have a friendly face and people respond to that with positivity normally
Maybe it's more how a person carries themselves than their looks? Because I have seen some "ugly" or overweight people rocking some bad ass clothes and makeup and get treated different than someone who obviously didn't even look in the mirror or have "given up" thin or not. It's how a person views or how others THING a person views themselves that society responds either positively or negatively to.
So regardless the body type, I say own it.
So regardless the body type, I say own it.
I just like myself. I never care if others find me attractive (okay, sometimes I have to meet up with smokin hot men.. I care those times) or whatever. I'm not sure if I even AM attractive but I think I'm funny& kind. My boyfriend loves me& in general if you're rude, I don't want to be your friend anyway.
I have never seen crazy different treatment between attractive/ not so attractive people but the. I probably don't pay much attention either. I feel badly for people who feel badly about themselves. I do think A LOT is how you present yourself. Overweight but wearing nice clothes? Yay for you! Thin& look like you just crawled out of a dumpster? Perhaps reevaluate your decisions. Sometimes I genuinely look like a huge slob but there is a difference between dressing sloppy and being unclean. Should we judge unclean people? No, probably not anymore than we should judge based on looks. But I do think a well presented overweight person would get treated better than an unclean thin person.
I have never seen crazy different treatment between attractive/ not so attractive people but the. I probably don't pay much attention either. I feel badly for people who feel badly about themselves. I do think A LOT is how you present yourself. Overweight but wearing nice clothes? Yay for you! Thin& look like you just crawled out of a dumpster? Perhaps reevaluate your decisions. Sometimes I genuinely look like a huge slob but there is a difference between dressing sloppy and being unclean. Should we judge unclean people? No, probably not anymore than we should judge based on looks. But I do think a well presented overweight person would get treated better than an unclean thin person.
I think the different treatment comes in very distinct circumstances....before you get to know someone situation or in split second judgments. I do think once personality comes into play, people get to know each other, interactions take place etc yes, that is what actually matters.
I really hate the whole idea of being presentable or put together, or lazy, or not caring about yourself, etc. Am I not caring about myself if I am out in the garden all day so a sweaty and dirty mess in old clothes, when I need a quick trip to the store and my priority is NOT to waste time taking a shower and cleaning up first because its silly? Is someone caring TOO much about themselves because they do? Its all just really ridiculous....
I really hate the whole idea of being presentable or put together, or lazy, or not caring about yourself, etc. Am I not caring about myself if I am out in the garden all day so a sweaty and dirty mess in old clothes, when I need a quick trip to the store and my priority is NOT to waste time taking a shower and cleaning up first because its silly? Is someone caring TOO much about themselves because they do? Its all just really ridiculous....
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm 5 feet tall and 170lbs. I'm not huge but I'm fat. I got brown hair that usually is a bit all over the place. I wear loose jeans and tee-shirts, no girly clothes for me. I also never wear makeup. But people are still nice to me, they'll hold doors for me and some years ago when I worked at Dollar General and my car died on the way to work, a bunch of people stopped to see if I needed help. People also will randomly start talking to me. I have a friend who is not really pretty at all, but she makes friends wherever she goes because she's very outgoing and friendly. When I've been out with my friend who has a significant disability (a series of mini-strokes left her barely able to walk and unable to really form words) I haven't noticed anyone treated us badly. They'll hold doors and stuff.
I try not to judge people or treat them different based on appearance or anything. The one thing that really affects me is smell. I'm not talking about simple "sweated in the sun for a few hours" BO or anything like that. I'm talking about that unclean smell that comes from not caring for yourself properly, or breath that smells like you haven't brushed your teeth since you've been born. I...I just can't. I mean, I'm polite and wouldn't ever say anything to the person. I just back away imperceptibly and try not to ever be close enough to smell it again. There is a girl at work who smells, and her breath smells like death. It could be a stomach condition, there are stomach conditions that can cause that. But still, it's horrific and I can't deal with it. So I try to stay a certain distance away from this girl at all times. I have the same issues with dogs that STINK, I just can't be near them. There was a poodle with facial cancer who smelled like death itself, it was awful. I was nauseous if I was near that dog. I don't know how the owners deal with it. I always wonder how I'd deal if something like that happened with my own dog.
I try not to judge people or treat them different based on appearance or anything. The one thing that really affects me is smell. I'm not talking about simple "sweated in the sun for a few hours" BO or anything like that. I'm talking about that unclean smell that comes from not caring for yourself properly, or breath that smells like you haven't brushed your teeth since you've been born. I...I just can't. I mean, I'm polite and wouldn't ever say anything to the person. I just back away imperceptibly and try not to ever be close enough to smell it again. There is a girl at work who smells, and her breath smells like death. It could be a stomach condition, there are stomach conditions that can cause that. But still, it's horrific and I can't deal with it. So I try to stay a certain distance away from this girl at all times. I have the same issues with dogs that STINK, I just can't be near them. There was a poodle with facial cancer who smelled like death itself, it was awful. I was nauseous if I was near that dog. I don't know how the owners deal with it. I always wonder how I'd deal if something like that happened with my own dog.
A bit late to this topic I know. I've skimmed through and found the point of "I only hang out with guys" interesting.
Throughout high school and mostly through my adult life so far, I have had significantly more male friends than female. I wont go as far as to say I "dislike" most females, nor do I hold a superiority complex about myself because of it.
I hang out with guys because I apparently have more "manly" interests. Simple as that.
I have never been interested in the shows that cater to the teenage/YA female, I don't particularly care about celebrity gossip, or what style of pants are "in" this season.
As such, I just gravitated more to guys. Honestly, I would have loved to have more female friends, but at the end of the day I just didn't fit in.
And yes, many girls outright hated me for it. That always bothered me. I guess I'm pretty okay looking, I was blessed with a lean build and an 'hourglass" shape (which is starting to fade with my laziness, I really need to work on that). So maybe it was jealousy on their part. But I never saw myself as that. Quite frankly I was "one of the guys"
As for judging based on looks. I do find I get treated better when I put an effort into how I look that day. But then again the other morning, as I was outside in baggy shorts & t-shirt, no makeup, hair looking like I was dragged through the bush and picking up dog crap, yet I got honked and winked at.
Throughout high school and mostly through my adult life so far, I have had significantly more male friends than female. I wont go as far as to say I "dislike" most females, nor do I hold a superiority complex about myself because of it.
I hang out with guys because I apparently have more "manly" interests. Simple as that.
I have never been interested in the shows that cater to the teenage/YA female, I don't particularly care about celebrity gossip, or what style of pants are "in" this season.
As such, I just gravitated more to guys. Honestly, I would have loved to have more female friends, but at the end of the day I just didn't fit in.
And yes, many girls outright hated me for it. That always bothered me. I guess I'm pretty okay looking, I was blessed with a lean build and an 'hourglass" shape (which is starting to fade with my laziness, I really need to work on that). So maybe it was jealousy on their part. But I never saw myself as that. Quite frankly I was "one of the guys"
As for judging based on looks. I do find I get treated better when I put an effort into how I look that day. But then again the other morning, as I was outside in baggy shorts & t-shirt, no makeup, hair looking like I was dragged through the bush and picking up dog crap, yet I got honked and winked at.
Maybe I am just lucky? I have never really been a "girly girl" and was much more of a tomboy type when younger but I never had problems having girl friends.....there are plenty of girls who do not like celebrity gossip or the latest clothing styles etc. Heck, even with my friends who are more "girly" I dont think those topics have ever really come up? Even for dances and the like, it was pretty basic "oh what are you wearing?" or maybe we would get together to get ready but we never had like deep discussions about it or anything. I am more "girly" now than I was, like I actually really enjoy hair and makeup stuff...but that doesnt redefine my friends or other interests etc
Maybe going to an all girl high school helped that? I had guy friends too, dont get me wrong. One of my very best friends through grade and highschool was a boy but I dont really get the idea of only having friends of one sex or the other.
Maybe going to an all girl high school helped that? I had guy friends too, dont get me wrong. One of my very best friends through grade and highschool was a boy but I dont really get the idea of only having friends of one sex or the other.