Discussion in 'The Fire Hydrant' started by jenv101, Oct 23, 2012.
I will add to this tonight or in the morning but today is MOVING DAY!!!!!!!!!!!
A bunch of my friends have babies between 6 and 10 months right now. Apparently the number one teething toy is this squeaky rubber giraffe that looks and sounds JUST LIKE A DOG TOY. Greta almost climbed someone to get to it during an intro one day. Lol.
Planning is awesome. If we had a kid right exactly when I hit the OMGWESHOULDHAVEAKID stage we would be horribly under-prepared. Although really after a couple years of research I *still* feel horribly under-prepared so maybe that's just how this feels.
I think that's just how it feels Taq - I asked a good friend of mine (with a 9? mo) how she felt when she found out that she was pregnant (after months of trying) and she said she sat down and cried first, THEN was happy. LOL Made me feel better about my periodic "ACK having kids is scary!!!" feelings.
Yeah totally agree! Even though we knew we wanted kids, the reality of it happening is still really scary lol! We just stared at each other in stunned silence when the test came back positive.
I seem to be leaning to the 'crunchy' side too after doing research.
Are you on Mothering.com? It's a great resource site if anyone doesn't know about it. They have birth month groups too and lots of forums.
I never had any bleeding but it was something that was always on my mind especially in the first trimester. I do know that it's pretty common though, so I hope your midwife can make you feel better! Give her a call if it is really bothering you!
WE HAVE THAT GIRAFFE! It's called Sophie or something... It really was/is Justin's favorite teether. It seems silly, but it really is very well designed.
That said, we don't have any plastic squeaky dog toys in our house like that, so we didn't have any issue with differentiation and Morgan has left the giraffe alone. But I can see how it could be an issue for others.
As for being crunchy, I am not opposed, and honestly would favor most crunchy parenting techniques. However, my husband was uncomfortable with a few things (cloth diapers and co-sleeping, mainly) and I was "on the fence", so we don't do them. We didn't do any babywearing, either, but that was mostly because Justin never really needed/cared for it. We did breastfeed, though.
I keep asking Matt what makes us think we're qualified to have kids - usually after I get done threatening the dogs or chasing one of them around the house while laughing hysterically. Thus far he has not come up with a good answer. Lol.
I guess I lean towards crunchy as well - I want to try slings and breastfeed and would prefer to deliver naturally. But really, my end goal for pregnancy is to end up with a baby. I'd prefer not to have a c section unless absolutely necessary but if it happens, it happens. And if I'm in horrible agonizing pain that I can't handle someone had better drug me.
I would LOVE to read that article! What a great idea, that is the one thing I am worried about with Saxon. He is bomb proof around kids, but he LOVES to destroy stuffies and wouldn't know the difference between his and baby's. Please share the link!
This was how I felt going in, too. I wanted a natural birth with no drugs. Even so, I still signed the paperwork for an epidural so that it was ready in case I changed my mind. Same for the c-section. I wanted to avoid it if at all possible, but I didn't want to completely block out that option in the case it became necessary.
That is pretty much how we are maxfox. I am not opposed to co sleeping but I knew it was not something I wanted to do. I have a hard enough time sleePing as it is and adding an extra body to our bed would not helP lol. Hannah has always been really good about sleeping on her own, though.
Although we didn't co sleep or babywear I still feel like we did attachment parenting in a way. Hannah and I have always been close and we've always had a lot of physical and emotional contact. That is probably why my weight gain came after she was born, I spent the majority of the first year snuggling her on the couch lol
Here is the link to that article:
I also have others on my training page there as well that have been published. One is how to prepare a dog for a baby, another is how to potty pen train them, and others. I have not updated the website though in a few years. Plan to in the new year though. Just way too many things have gone on for me to sit down and work on it. Hope it helps.
Hehe, I was opposed to cosleeping for us...then I had my daughter. It was co-sleep or get no sleep
Honestly, as I am not a naturally motherly type I feel in a way lucky that I had a very spirited and high needs first baby. If she had been super easy going I dont think I would've been pushed to really learn how to mother and nurture out of my comfort zone.
Babywearing, the slings, wraps, mei tais, etc arent important, but holding your baby and being close is...I just feel sad in this culture the push is often to immediately start pushing babies and children away. "Don't spoil them!" "They will never sleep on their own, walk, want to be put down, etc". It makes me
Mothering is a WONDERFUL resource. It is a huge forum and of course there is the expected forum drama but it is such an amazing starting point to research well, anything. I was quite active on the pet forum there years ago lol.
Natural Birth - for me its not that one HAS to go natural or taking medications, pain relief etc is a failure....because that is not the case. What it means to me is that women should take back the power and own birth. Don't let Drs and insurance treat it as a disease that needs a cure by a certain time in a certain time frame. Understand the very real risks of the drugs and procedures often used in hospitals and why they were first implemented...often NOT for the mother but to take power away from the mother
Lilah was planned natural, Cian was a planned homebirth. BOTH ended up c-section. I have no guilt over it, no remorse. Do I wish I had been able to deliver? Of course! Lilah especially, the drugs used and induction (water broke but then sealed back up...hindsight I shouldve just waited it out, instead I went to the hospital where they induced which, as she wasnt ready, didnt work) really caused some issues with her. She was a drugged baby when she came out and it took as awhile to get over that. She was not harmed medically or physically, but she was just not ready to come out. If I hadnt been so dead set on breastfeeding, it wouldnt have happened. We had a very rocky start and I almost gave up several times...my DH was awesome and was just so calm and matter of fact about it which really helped me.
Cian, I ended up with the epidural still (and csection of course) but no other drugs (pitocin) and was on the epidural for much less time. I had also gone into labor on my own with him (albeit 10 days "late"). Big difference when he was born. He was ready and it showed.
Gah, this post is kind of all over the place and I have to go get a couple things done...oh well lol, sorry for the rambling mess
Yes luckily hannah has always been good about sleeping on her own. Every on e in a while she would ask to come into our bed or i would bring her in and for some reason this signalled to her that it was time to PLAY lol. Even now if she comes into our bed she is up for at least an hour and I never go to sleep. I just can't sleep with the extra body in our bed. I can't sleep in general so an extra obstacle makes it impossible for me. I would rather sleep on the floor in her room that have her squished into our bed lol
The way I see it, parenting kind of goes like this:
I'm HOPING to breast feed my child, but I might need medication or my child might have an intolerance or they may not latch on no matter what I do.
I PLAN on baby-wearing but my kid might hate it or it might be too hard on my back or it might just be really uncomfortable
I don't really plan on co-sleeping but if I have a kid and suddenly it seems 100x easier to co-sleep and I'm confident it's a safe decision for the baby, then that's probably what we'll end up doing.
and I feel like that's kind of how it goes as the kid grows up, too...you can plan on putting them in private school and realize they'll do better in the public school system, or plan on being a SAHM and realize you were way happier working or you can't provide for your kid that way, you can plan on feeding them a completely organic diet but if it's putting a financial burden on your family and it's too stressful to prepare fresh food all the time, well, that might change. "Planning" how to raise your baby seems a whole lot more like trial-and-error to me than actual planning.
Exactly. My advice is to research and understand why things are suggested, how things work, how a baby develops, what their needs are, appropriate expectations, etc but realize that parenting is mostly trial and error
The "i hope to breastfeed" attitude would've had me tapping out at day 2 when my nipples becamse so blistered due to a poor latch I was screaming in pain. I've had to look at it as come hell or high water I am going to breastfeed. I'm on day 7 now and still trucking through. It hurts. It sucks. My friends and family dont want to be around me when I nurse because I am either screaming or crying... and yet its that important to me to carry on.
I dont think there is anything wrong with that attitude as really, parenting will take you on a wild journey and its good to remain open minded. I just know that for me personally, with breastfeeding, the going has gotten tough. But I am totally able to breastfeed and so is my son. We just suck at it and need to learn how to better.
See...I think most moms who have done ANY kind of research on breastfeeding expect it to hurt like hell....I'm not saying parents should give up what they thought was right the second it doesn't go as planned, but if you're a mom who needs medication in able to be physically or mentally able to care for your kid and it's not safe to breastfeed with, or your child is steadily losing weight and miserable because they're having such a hard time feeding, or it's making them ILL to breastfeed, it's pretty clear that's not the best decision for you.
YES. All of this. Only this whole outlook pretty much applies to my entire life now because I don't like being crushed when something doesn't work out exactly the way I thought it would. And that has happened several times before now. Lol.
Actually, if it hurts something is wrong...it should NOT hurt. If it hurts, get a LC to help, check the latch, check tongue tie, etc...it should not hurt.
the rest, I agree....except again the importance is on knowing what IS normal, what can be changed, why they may be reacting, etc. Cian had issues with my milk at first, once I stopped eating dairy, he was fine. Many medications actually are safe with breastfeeding or they have equivalents that are. Again, not saying someone HAS to breastfeed, but I get frustrated when women who want to are given the old "well you tried, its ok to switch" when they need a "You've got this, you are doing great!". Its not common for there to be issues that cant be solved with some tweaking...again, it certainly DOES happen for sure...but its not as common as it seems.