Chaz Moms and Moms-to-Be Chat (everyone welcome)

Discussion in 'The Fire Hydrant' started by jenv101, Oct 23, 2012.

  1. AllisonPitbullLvr

    AllisonPitbullLvr New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2012
    Messages:
    886
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I'm using a midwife (covered by provincial healthcare!) because I wanted hand holding, I wanted the support of pregnancy and birth experts who are women, and I wanted the aftercare once the baby was born. So far they've been wonderful! At 8 weeks I had some bleeding and completely lost my mind. Within two minutes I had one of my midwives on the phone, reassuring me and setting up an ultrasound ASAP. It was fantastic.

    I don't have any bump pics yet but I DO have an ultrasound pic. But it won't let me post it here...
     
  2. maxfox426

    maxfox426 My dog tickles my soul

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2008
    Messages:
    3,808
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    One dog, Two cats, Four sugar gliders, Seven corns
    Location:
    Indianapolis, IN
    I just want to say that I had a hospital birth, and was under NO pressure for an epidural, c-section, etc. I didn't even have to make a big fuss about avoiding those things. I had made my intentions clear from the beginning, and never once did I feel like I had to tell my doctor to "shove it" or anything of that sort. Honestly, I was encouraged and supported by my entire medical team, and after my son was born I was part of the hospital "tour", because all the nurses wanted to see "that first time mom that went all natural!" lol

    When my son was one week past due and nearly 9lbs according to the ultrasound, my doctor and I talked is out (ie: she asked me my feelings on the matter) and together we scheduled an induction for the following week as a failsafe. In the end, we didn't need it. He was born later that night naturally, no drugs, no surgery.

    Yes, you need to be clear with your doctor(s) about what you want to happen, but it just... makes me sad that people assume they have to go into everything with guns ablazing to get their way. I do realize that there are pushy doctors out there, and I'm not trying to discount that. I just don't think it's fair to assume EVERY doctor is.

    Also, from a collection of stories from my friends... well, let's just say I wouldn't blame their doctors. I had a cousin that tried to schedule an early c-section in order to line up the birth with her mom's vacation from work. I had a friend that requested an early induction because she was just "too tired of waiting around." Both of those cases, they posted all over Facebook about how it wasn't fair that their doctors weren't listening to them.




    Okay. Sorry. I just had to get that out.




    On the subject of baby gear... my advice is to take it easy. Put in a good amount of research and make a solid investment in a car seat. That is priority #1, in my opinion. Yes there are a lot of things you will need to have ready before Day 1 (crib or bassinette, changing station, etc.) but you aren't going to need a high chair right away, or any big play equipment. You can take some time on those things. :)

    Strollers are a definite "maybe", depending on your personal style. We got an umbrella-style stroller frame that the carseat/carrier fit into early on, because we like to go out and about. But that was just us.

    I also say... take all parenting advice with a little grain of salt. Everybody will have advice. Now, I don't mean to say that you should disregard all advice, but just realize that even when people are telling you to do something different, it does NOT mean you are doing anything wrong. Nothing is set in stone, and rarely (if ever) is there only one option to anything. You just have to learn to do what works for you, your child, and your family.

    Above all else, just do the best you can, take your time to learn what you need, and RELAX. There will be tough days. There will be exhausting days. They will always get better. ;)
     
  3. Paige

    Paige Let it be

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2007
    Messages:
    7,359
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I have babies fast. Briggs was 3.5 from the time Ipcould feel a contraction with the last hour being pushing. Blake was 2.5 from first contraction to birth and i only pushed for 15 minutes. Blake's labor made me understand why people take drugs. I was regretting not asking for them right away those last 5 minutes because they were no longer an option. I labor too fast for painkillers. I will probably never experience any pain meds or an epidural while in labor. It hurts but I think most people could hold out if they thought it would only last 3 hours.

    I breastfeed and I babywear. I am very much one of those attachment paretning types. I dont do it because its the new craze. Its how I was raised and its what feels right to me.
     
  4. sparks19

    sparks19 I'd rather be at Disney

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2005
    Messages:
    28,563
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Occupation:
    3
    Location:
    Lancaster, PA
    Home Page:
    she didn't have an actual allergy but milk gave her an upset stomach (she still has issues with milk and I have to restrict her access to it to one cup a day or she gets really constipated)

    I wasn't positive it was milk that was the problem at the time but whenever I would nurse her she would have an upset tummy or just be fussy in general. I thought maybe she wasn't getting enough so I started just pumping and supplementing with formula. She was still having issues and my supply was dwindling quickly. Then we tried soy formula and that seemed to fix the issue.

    but the kid LOVES milk. it's ridiculous lol. So I have to be strict on the one glass of milk a day rule lol. We tried the almond milk but she doesnt like it, she wants the real thing lol
     
  5. NicoleLJ

    NicoleLJ PSD Partner

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2004
    Messages:
    1,600
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    breeder of WSS, Stay at Home Mom
    Location:
    Canada
    Home Page:
    THis is soooooo important it should be in caps and bolded. LOL When I had my daughter I had everyone under the sun giving me advice and getting nasty if I didn't agree, or do it perfectly their way. I start to get so stressed out. Then a very special woman(who was also a grandmother) sat with me and told me that advice is just that. Advice. THat there is no way to please everyone so I should concintrate on what worked for me and my baby. That dropped my stress level a lot. I was also taking parenting courses as well at the time and this advice helped me to start speaking up in class and asking questions that led to some really great discussions for the whole class. Awsome post.
     
  6. Danefied

    Danefied New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2010
    Messages:
    1,722
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    One husband of 15 years
    Location:
    Southeast
    Aw... babies!

    I second Dr. Sears' book - such a gold mine, and he is so supportive of the mom doing what feels right for HER and her baby. I love that about it.

    My guys were preemies, twins, and baby B had a deformity of her umbilical cord. Had she been a singleton, they would have taken her at 27 weeks when they discoverd it since that deformity eventually results in fetal death. Instead they hospitalized me, put me on a fetal monitor, and did twice daily level 2 ultrasounds. Long, long, long story short (that also involves a frantic drive to the hospital in the neighbor's new luxury car with cream colored leather seats while I was having a placental abrubtion), I now have two 100% normal, happy, wonderful kiddos who will be 10 next month <3

    I'm a total flower child at heart and I would have loved nothing more than to have a quiet home birth with Sara Mclaughlan playing piano in the background, but the universe has a way of laughing at our best laid plans :D Its all good though. Like so many things, parenting is about being present for the journey, not arriving at any particular destination.

    Speaking of - my new favorite resource is a facebook group, "parenting beyond punishment". I also love "teach through love" or "teach with love" can't remember the title, but also on FB. Great sites!
     
  7. jenv101

    jenv101 Bite Club

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2010
    Messages:
    1,590
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    2
    Location:
    Ontario
    Home Page:
    Wow, lots to catch up on in here already! :)

    First - Pictures!

    20 week ultrasound - it's a girl (not 100% but most likely)

    [​IMG]
    ultrasound by Holga-Jen, on Flickr

    And me today at 23.5 weeks:

    [​IMG]
    photo(12) by Holga-Jen, on Flickr
     
  8. NicoleLJ

    NicoleLJ PSD Partner

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2004
    Messages:
    1,600
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    breeder of WSS, Stay at Home Mom
    Location:
    Canada
    Home Page:
    I have a lot of respect for moms who can post their beautiful bump photos. I on the other hand do not have that kind of bravery even though I have lost 15lbs this pregnancy(haven't gained any weight) I still can't bring myself to do it.
     
  9. jenv101

    jenv101 Bite Club

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2010
    Messages:
    1,590
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    2
    Location:
    Ontario
    Home Page:
    You're in Canada I assume? Whereabouts? I'm using a midwife too and I LOVE the whole experience so far. We are lucky that they are covered under our healthcare (in *most* provinces).

    You have to upload your photo to a hosting site such as Photobucket or Flickr and then post the link using the insert image button. Have you tried that?
     
  10. jenv101

    jenv101 Bite Club

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2010
    Messages:
    1,590
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    2
    Location:
    Ontario
    Home Page:
    I feel like I'm getting larger by the day and my skin is starting to hurt... but at the same time I know I'm only going to get bigger so I might as well enjoy it! LOL I think the photo makes me look a bit smaller than I actually am. We are hopefully going to get some family shots soon so I can have something better than just self portraits!
     
  11. AllisonPitbullLvr

    AllisonPitbullLvr New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2012
    Messages:
    886
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I'm in southern Ontario. I was really lucky to get a midwife in my area because they're in super high demand. I called as soon as I found out and still got turned away by one practice!

    I tried posting using tapatalk but this forum only let's me post that way in certain places? I'll try with my photo bucket account once I'm on a real computer.
     
  12. jenv101

    jenv101 Bite Club

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2010
    Messages:
    1,590
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    2
    Location:
    Ontario
    Home Page:
    Nice, so am I (London)! There are waiting lists down here for Midwives.

    All of you ladies with high energy dogs, I feel your worry! Especially for the first few months it's going to be challenging I'm sure. I will be relying on my husband to do most of the exercising/training for those first few months.

    We are going to get them used to being in their crates while we are home as well since I don't want them loose all day when I'm home by myself with baby. They are normally in their crates when we are at work so while they are used to that part, they are not used to being in them when we are at home unless it's bedtime.
     
  13. AllisonPitbullLvr

    AllisonPitbullLvr New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2012
    Messages:
    886
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I'm in a tiny town north of Guelph (but work and spend most of my time there.)

    My concern is that my DH is not interested in doing anything with/for the dogs. Here's hoping he likes evening baby duty then!
     
  14. NicoleLJ

    NicoleLJ PSD Partner

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2004
    Messages:
    1,600
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    breeder of WSS, Stay at Home Mom
    Location:
    Canada
    Home Page:
    ummm have you guys thought of teaching them place commands and certian behaviours while you are pregnant so that when baby is born they are already used to the routine? Some of the ones my girls are already trained for, including Daya who is a 6 month old white swiss shepherd or Berger Blanc Suisse.

    Breast pump comes out they run to their place and stay their till it is put away.
    Play mat is put on floor they all lay down and can lay next to it but not touching the mat
    meals are being eated they run to their place and stay their till dishes are put on the counter
    Swing is moving they can't come within 2 feet of it
    Bouncy chair is out they can't come within two feet of it.
    People visit they get to greet then go to their places till told
    Already know how to walk with a stroller
    have to lay next to the car seat

    These are just some of the things I have been teaching Luna and Daya the past several months. That way they don't have to be crated. Plus they are both trained to exercise on the treadmill if I can't take them out into the yard and Doug can't take them for a run.

    Just some ideas. Sheena already has been trained in all this.
     
  15. Barbara!

    Barbara! New Member

    Joined:
    May 23, 2012
    Messages:
    1,457
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I baby-mom-envious people welcome here as well? Lol. I want a baby.
     
  16. jenv101

    jenv101 Bite Club

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2010
    Messages:
    1,590
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    2
    Location:
    Ontario
    Home Page:
    Thanks Nicole - great ideas! I don't have any baby stuff yet but will definitely be getting them used to it once I do.

    My dogs are quite insane, clumsy, and are much more act before they think, despite lots of training and exercise, so crating will be done when I'm home alone during the day I'm sure. It's their daily routine as it is, so that part is not much of a change. They are used to getting most of their activity in the evening.

    That is just my idea of the first few months, but who knows, things could change! Maybe they will surprise me and be much better than I am picturing in my head lol.
     
  17. AllisonPitbullLvr

    AllisonPitbullLvr New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2012
    Messages:
    886
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Good points Nicole. My younger (he'll be six when the baby is born) dog is a constant work in progress but his basics are pretty good. We are in an adult obedience clicker class right now to get everything cemented in his brain. We're working on getting him to go to his bed, no matter what, and stay there. We are brushing up on his door manners which is tough because right now we hardly ever get visitors but will be inundated when the baby is born. Etc. So we definitely realized the importance of starting early.

    My old dog, she's nearly 13, doesn't have many habits I'm worried about but anything that DOES crop up will be hard to address as she has two torn cruciate ligaments, a bum shoulder, is slowly starting to lose some cognitive function and has terrible arthritis. She's happy and we (ok, I) let her get away with most anything because she's such a good girl. We'll see how she adjusts.
     
  18. milos_mommy

    milos_mommy Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2006
    Messages:
    15,346
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Does anyone who has a child have a dog who either had aggression issues, or a dog who had never ever been around babies or children before?
     
  19. jenv101

    jenv101 Bite Club

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2010
    Messages:
    1,590
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    2
    Location:
    Ontario
    Home Page:
    This is on my to-read list already! I will be starting it when I'm done with the birth books.

    I'm going to attempt baby wearing and cloth diapers, so anyone who wants to recommend stuff, feel free! We are taking a babywearing class next weekend actually.

    Co-sleeping and breast feeding are also high on my list. I have BF books on my to-read list as well.
     
  20. AllisonPitbullLvr

    AllisonPitbullLvr New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2012
    Messages:
    886
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    No aggression issues here thankfully.

    The one baby item we purchased already was a ring sling. Obi doesn't jump up but I think he would in the case so that he could see the baby. So we got it early so that we can practice.

    My dogs are great with infants and toddlers, it's the crawling stage that weirds them out!
     

Share This Page