Broke people making more kids...

Discussion in 'The Fire Hydrant' started by Fran27, Oct 3, 2012.

  1. Renee750il

    Renee750il Felurian

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    Sadly, Yoko, there are private adoptions that are essentially that. People who want to adopt a newborn of a specific ethnicity, for example.

    It doesn't mean they aren't going to love the child they adopt, just that they can afford to set up a private adoption, often arranged before the child is born.

    Other scenarios happen as well, like same-sex couples who would have a difficult time adopting through regular channels.
     
  2. darkchild16

    darkchild16 We are Home.

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    You can plan for it and something goes wrong. Sorry but thats life.

    We had 500 saved up months before Morgan came and ALL our bills paid for 2 months when we had Morgan. Dad had his accident. There went the fund to cover us just in case. Jeremy had to take a week unpaid at work, our emergency funds were tapped money was TIGHT. We sold something on ebay to cover Connors birthday. Only to find out you dont get the money right away. Thankfully someone let us borrow the money and pay it back. If dad hadnt of had his accident that NEVER would have happened.
     
  3. darkchild16

    darkchild16 We are Home.

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    We used 3 and SURPRISE. :rofl1:
     
  4. zoe08

    zoe08 New Member

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    Not saying it can't happen, just saying that the MAJORITY of people who have "accidents" aren't using birth control properly or doubling up.

    I believe that it can happen....I just had a freak out thinking it might have happened to me (test was negative though), I just don't think that everyone who has an "accidental" pregnancy can blame it on birth control failure.
     
  5. Greenmagick

    Greenmagick New Member

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    True, but using multiple kinds of BC isnt always healthy either so can't really blame someone for that IMO.
     
  6. Lyzelle

    Lyzelle New Member

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    No, they certainly can. Condoms break, most women aren't educated on what medications may make your birth control not work, IUDs and Implanon depends entirely on the doctor placing them. Things like Depo can wear off weeks before another dose is due. Some doctors have given women low dose hormone therapy, when they needed full dose for pregnancy prevention. Even more than one type of birth control, without telling a woman that she shouldn't use both, because it would render both useless. It's a combo of a lot of things. Plus just regular fail rates.

    Birth control failure is actually fairly common.
     
  7. yoko

    yoko New Member

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    I understand it can happen but to put it out there like it is the norm, which it isn't, makes it harder on families who go through a legit adoption agency.

    They already go through questions like when are they going to have their real child, how they could love the child even though they didn't give birth to them, along with other personal asinine questions. There is one where a parent of an international adoption is asked if they just wanted an Asian doll. Things like this where people who have no idea continue to push the image of children and babies being 'product' just makes another hurdle adoptive families run into.
     
  8. Fran27

    Fran27 New Member

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    Yeah but you didn't go and try to get a 3rd kid in these conditions, lol. That's the difference.
     
  9. darkchild16

    darkchild16 We are Home.

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    Actually Morgan was number 3 :rofl1:
     
  10. Fran27

    Fran27 New Member

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    Yeah sorry I didn't count the first one... lol. Ok, I meant 4th :D
     
  11. darkchild16

    darkchild16 We are Home.

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    LOl thats ok. I thought it was funny since he was born during that so he really was adding number 3.
     
  12. Fran27

    Fran27 New Member

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    Ooooh yeah. I forgot. They just bought a new house, without waiting to sell the last one. Both absolutely gorgeous, and like 3000 square feet. I guess that's why they're broke.

    I guess some people don't think?
     
  13. -bogart-

    -bogart- Member of WHODAT Nation.

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    :hail::hail::hail::hail:

    Or just plain controlling freak who is more concerned with the
    new floors and vacations. Or a religoius freak whom thinks the devil is in everything
     
  14. sillysally

    sillysally Obey the Toad.

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    DH grew up in a huge family (8 kids-first one was planned, the rest were rhythm method babies). Dad was the only one who worked and he made roughly 60k a year. They never went on assistance, but they had to be very vigilant with their money to avoid it. The kids made their own way after high school-no college fund, etc. However, it was a loving home and I don't think DH suffered because of it. So long as the kid is loved, has food in their bellies, a roof over their head and clothes on their backs there are far worse things for a child to have to deal with than broke parents.
     
  15. Lyzelle

    Lyzelle New Member

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    Agreed.
     
  16. Tahla9999

    Tahla9999 Active Member

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    I think people are skipping the real problem here. Sex! Poor people should not be having sex at all to prevent any "accidents" from occurring. Thats my stance. If you have sex and your poor, your irresponsible!*sarcasm*


    Oh I only got cake for my birthday, never any presents.
     
  17. Lyzelle

    Lyzelle New Member

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    You scared me for a sentence or two, there. :eek:
     
  18. StephyMei1112

    StephyMei1112 Blackout

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    Absolutely no offense in this intended.

    IMO Before I even have one I should preferably have alot of stuff straightened out. Finances, home situation, what you can/can't handle, stress levels etc - I am extremely harsh on myself about this child stuff. My lifestyle isn't right to raise a child up in, I wouldn't be a good parent/role model, I don't even know who I am quite yet - what more of trying to help someone find their place in this crazy world?; People keep telling me "You'll be fine, kids are good for you, have some quick!, what are you waiting for?" and so on. More to the point I have zero maternal instinct and even less desire to have a child of my own. If an accident occurred and it went too far beyond the point/timeframe of abortion I would have him/her adopted - preferably a closed one too. If I were the child I wouldn't want to know that my biological mom was someone like me.

    I can deal with having train wrecked my own life - I can't deal with wrecking a child's. I just can't. Kids are privileges and gifts - not rights and commodities. They should be provided with love, correct guidance (not saying that anyone's particular guidance is correct or uncorrect - only speaking for myself), support, compassion, and basic stability. If I can't provide these elements to a child then I am not going to have one anytime soon. Regardless of money I am not a fit person to be a parent or to raise a child - I'm not sad about it at all; Not allowing my irresponsibility or recklessness affect a innocent soul will be my contribution to the world.

    P.S

    I just asked my mom now - "What were you thinking when you had me?"

    "I wasn't, Obviously." lol.
     
  19. sparks19

    sparks19 I'd rather be at Disney

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    After we had Hannah and were paying the bills from that we couldn't reasonably afford to do it again right away.. So we didn't have sex. Is it that outrageous? Lol we did LOTS of other stuff to stay intimate and our "sex life" was great just without any risk pf pregnancy which was all the better lol. For us... That was the only reliable method to make certain we didn't end up with more L&D hospital bills we couldn't afford at the time and a baby I wasn't ready for lol. It worked :)

    At this point we are considering adopting a child (not a baby) but if we were graced with a pregnancy we would be fine

    I think ad long as you can feed and shelter and support your kids... All the rest is gravy but if you can't give them the basic nessecities then perhaps extreme measures are in order
     
  20. JessLough

    JessLough Love My Mutt

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    You know, the double standard here is interesting. Can't afford am emergency vet visit should something happen? DONT YOU DARE GET A NEW PET. Cant afford to feed the kid you have? By all means, go have another kid! Let everybody else pay for it!
     

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