Best Argument against Intact Dogs.....ever.

Discussion in 'Dogs - General Dog Chat' started by noodlerubyallie, Feb 26, 2009.

  1. noodlerubyallie

    noodlerubyallie Sprayin' the spiders

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    My husband is COMPLETELY against having an intact dog in the house.

    "Why?" I ask him

    "Because he'll hump everything."

    "No he won't." I say.

    "Well, he'll mark in the house."

    "No, he won't." I say.

    He continues to whine about it, so I get sick of it and ask him, straight out, what his REAL problem is.

    "He's going to rub it all over me all the time."

    "Rub what?" I say (faking ignorance)

    "His......stuff."

    "OOOOOHHHH, you mean his man parts? No he won't." I say.

    "Yes he will!"

    I'm quiet for a few moments, then tell my husband:

    "You know that Dobermans are HUGE......right?"

    He gives me a disgusted look and leaves the room as I die laughing.:rofl1:

    Oh husbands.....they're good for something!
     
  2. Izzy's Valkyrie

    Izzy's Valkyrie Very Food Agressive

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    Lol that is an interesting excuse....
     
  3. Gypsydals

    Gypsydals New Member

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    *snickers* The things husbands come up with. Noodle I have to say with that comment he made, you might have to find another man to touch your dobie boys equipment when you get him. Cause if hes having a problem with him rubbing "it" on him, he sure as heck won't be voluntering to touch "it". I won't even tell you my husbands excuse not to touch Ivan in that area. *rolls eyes*
     
  4. Romy

    Romy Taxiderpy

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    :rofl1:

    I can't even imagine *how* an intact male would manage to rub his junk on someone. That's what I like about Strider having long hair though, is that I don't have to look at his stuff.
     
  5. Gypsydals

    Gypsydals New Member

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    Its possible Romy. Ivan tries it inadvertantly I "think". He will come at me sideways. But he thinks he has to touch me ALL the time. And depending how I'm sitting my foot ends up under his belly area.
     
  6. shadowfacedanes

    shadowfacedanes *Biter*

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    Ha. Tell him an intact doberman ain't got nothing on an intact dane. Been there, done that. I even had people tell me I should've put boxers on them so their "stuff" wasn't so visible. :rofl1:
     
  7. Renee750il

    Renee750il Felurian

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    Bimmer . . . well, he's got a really furry set of pants, but the little fella has got a PAIR on him, lol.

    He doesn't hump anything, has never so much as thought of marking in the house, is an absolute gentleman in every way, and face it, he NEEDS big cahonies if he's going to run a house with a Fila and an APBT bitch :rofl1:
     
  8. Miakoda

    Miakoda New Member

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    Eh.......Rex would try to get you....and finish on you. It was awful. Just awful. :(
     
  9. Xeph

    Xeph New Member

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    I don't think intact Danes have anything on the Basset Boys x.x!
     
  10. Romy

    Romy Taxiderpy

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    eeeeewwww. Sooo glad my dog does not do that. If he did, he'd lose them in a hurry.

    I know one lady who says that when she's petting her male dogs and they hang their stuff out, she says she smacks it with a pencil :rofl1: to make them "put it back".

    After having Strider though, I don't know if I could live with a short coated intact male. Even Seamus was awful, he was a white dog with huge black things just hanging off the back there..and when they neutered him they left his sad little black manpurse, it was so horrible, lol.
     
  11. youhavenoidea

    youhavenoidea I love my Weimaheiny!

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    I'm having a hard time with Slade and the judges' "junk examinations" in the ring. So I'm on a quest to desensitize him. I'm forever asking the bf to mock examine him to help with the process. He refuses.

    Me: "Come over here and touch his junk, would ya?"

    Him: "Um, no?"

    Me: "Common! It's not a big deal! I just need you to cup his nutters - just for a second!"

    Him: "Hell no."

    Me: "Pleeeeeaaaaaassssse?! They're just little baby ones! They're not even gross!"

    Him: "Fondle his balls yourself! I'm not doing it! Ew!"

    Me: "I already know he'll let ME touch them! I touch them all the time!"

    Him: "You are so far beyond the crazy dog lady. *gives me weird look* You're lucky you're hot enough to overshadow the weird."


    Bwahahahaha.
     
  12. Gypsydals

    Gypsydals New Member

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    Pretty much what my hubby did/does. Mine tells me I am not going to get freaky with the dog. SIGHSSSSSSSS. Men I don't get them.
     
  13. AgilityPup

    AgilityPup Agility freak!

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    Morrie will rub himself on us - drives me freaking nuts! (No pun intended!) But he's not big on humping other then when there's a female in heat. He will mark in the house though, makes me crazy!

    I don't like to have intact males, but I'm not really a male dog person anyway. I work better with female furpeople, and male people. lol
     
  14. Tankstar

    Tankstar ~Lisa~

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    I'll send Blaze over. he is a perfect gentlmen in every way. Plus he wears thick pants you cant see a thing lol
     
  15. skittledoo

    skittledoo Crazy naked dog lady

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    Hahahaha
     
  16. Paige

    Paige Let it be

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    Spanky is the master at rubbing his balls on people. He comes up to them, looking like he wants his butt scratched, so they'll scratch his bum, then he'll ever so slowly stand up on his tippy toes and bam! You just touched his testicles.

    :D

    He really enjoys it too. It cracks me up. People are always asking me what in the heck my Border Collie is doing (he backs up towards people, butt in the air). I grin like a mad woman 'cause I know what is to come. Sneaky, sneaky Spanky.
     
  17. bubbatd

    bubbatd Moderator

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    I've had many intact males and none did this ! Wierd !
     
  18. perla123

    perla123 New Member

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    LOL. Jonathan will call me if he is bathing kiana so I can clean her you know what:rolleyes: He says he is not in to touching female doggy parts.
     
  19. Romy

    Romy Taxiderpy

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    I wonder if us girls are not as worried about it because we're the ones getting stuck changing baby diapers and stuff, lol.
     
  20. noodlerubyallie

    noodlerubyallie Sprayin' the spiders

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    I'm sure I'll have many, many stories of needing help with exams...and Jeremy refusing LOL!

    The silly part about it...is that he's not worried about GIRL parts getting rubbed IN HIS FACE....(Noodle!) He's worried about equipment that HE has getting rubbed on him.:rofl1:

    Men are weird.
     

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