How Can You Guys Be So Rude????

Fruit bat · Mar 30, 2007

I just read the thread "eek help with unexpected pups" There were a few of you that responded nicely and tried to help her out . People need advice and we should be able to ask for it here. I got Sadie from a shelter, The girl at the counter said she was a " PROBABLE SPAY " meaning they didn't know. Her scar is barely noticeable.
As for the suggestion that the pups be aborted, thats ok advice if you are a person who can do it. But don't back it up with the argument that humans don't end up in shelters and get PTS> You make your selves sound ignorant and hipocritical. Being aborted or put to sleep would be far kinder than the fate of a child of an addicted prostitute being raped and murdered by her pimp. REALITY!!!!
Ease up and be nice, she just asked for help .If you can't give it then stay off those threads. The last time I checked the only one born perfect and without sin was JESUS.

joce · Mar 30, 2007

Its an animal lovers forum-they only want what is best for the dogs-you can not bash them for that. they definately are not the ones sounding ignorant.

Not everyone can have the same happy go lucky opinions on things-it makes for a very boring world.

Charliesmommy · Mar 30, 2007

I am with you Fruit Bat. I am fairly new here and I have had a couple of things that I would like to ask questions about but I have not done so for fear of being attacked in the same manner.

Fruit bat · Mar 30, 2007

Yeah I know but she loves her animal and just asked for help.If people can't give it they shouln't be rude.

mamasobuco · Mar 30, 2007

Well Said! :hail:

opcorn:

sparks19 · Mar 30, 2007

Not everyone is as "brilliant" as everyone on this site..... it's like no one can make a mistake. I am with you fruit bat. I have seen so many of those threads. Do they really think they are helping? Not so much. You can give advice without coming off as being pompous and arrogant.

We are all animal lovers but we aren't all as smart as we like to act like we are. I really hope you don't make a mistake and get a reaction like this.... but of course you would never be so stupid right...

Everyone does something dumb sometimes

Basically.... the deed is done.... give advice that is helpful in resolving the situation and helping the person to help their dog. Being a bully does nothing but put the person on the defensive and does not help their dog one bit.... if we are true animal lovers we should be able to give advice without being tools about it.

You don't have to be "happy go lucky" just give advice that might help and leave it at that... you don't have to put your personal jabs in there... it helps no one. If you are not capable of doing so.... don't post... write in your journal to yourself.

Saje · Mar 30, 2007

They were off topic and many of them didn't really post advice but I don't see anyone being rude. It all comes from a good place.

That being said I'll see what I can do about keeping it on topic.

SharkyX · Mar 30, 2007

It's not even that people had a different opinion etc.
It's that after they expressed what they would do in regards to aborting the pups, and she declined and said she would rather except the burden financially and time wise of raising pups and finding them homes etc people still persisted and got nastier in there comments.
Having your opinion is one thing, being an ass when somebody has already considered your opinions and said they don't find them preferable is another.

Fruit bat · Mar 30, 2007

I have seen threads about women that are pregnant and everyone is "oooh... Congrats and all that" we don't know that one of these women won't beat that baby , throw it in the dumpster or lock it in the car and push it in the lake. My piont is that you guys don't start in on them so why do you do it to someone expecting pups ? just be nice .

Renee750il · Mar 30, 2007

It's probably time for us all to go back and read this http://www.chazhound.com/forums/showthread.php?t=30198 as a refresher

Saje · Mar 30, 2007

That's not really a fair analogy. We volunteer at shelters regularly and see what happens to all of these pups. Dogs have multiple babies at one time and can have them several times a year. Plus there are laws to regulate abuse on humans and but not so much for dogs. Nobody is saying that Jessie is going to abuse her dogs

But something needs to be done to make sure they don't suffer throughout their lives. It's about being responsible. It's not really the same situation at all.

Personally, I think it sounds like Jessie is going to do the best she can for the dogs but some people need to know that the pups best interest is being looked after. And not everyone goes about that the best way.

Like I said before – there are good intentions behind the comments.

jess2416 · Mar 30, 2007

I agree with Saje...While sure a few good have made better choices with their words, Im sure that everyone that responded to that thread had nothing but good intentions...Its not that people are trying to berate her or bring her down, they just CARE about the well-being of the dog and the pups in question...

Sure some may come off as rude but Im sure with most of them its meant with the best of intentions, its just frustrating (for me anyway) that everyday there is a thread about OMG..puppies what do I do...and so on and so forth..

I do understand that this is a different circumstance, but people are only wanting whats best for the dog

Fruit bat · Mar 30, 2007

I think it was a totally fair analogy. I was making a point about cruelty. It happens. There is no way to stop it all . I wish there was but to say those pups don't deserve to be born is just not right. It would be like saying a child shouldn't be born because something bad MIGHT happen.

Saje · Mar 30, 2007

I'm not saying they don't deserve to be born and I haven't pushed the issue. What I was saying that comparing dogs and people isn't even close. You can't even compare dogs and horses. There is a lot of abuse in the horse world too or with any living creature for that matter. People suck. But the fact is that dogs have multiple, frequent births and that makes a world of difference. You could compare them to mice or cats. The pet population increases substantially with every litter and the more dogs there are in the world the greater risk there are that animals will go to poor homes.

Aussie Red · Mar 30, 2007

Karyn I just read that thread you were talking about. I don't think that RUDE is the way I took it but PASSIONATE would be. Maybe some here don't quite know how to type their feelings about a cause they feel so much passion for in a gentle manner. I would personally have aborted them and you know that but since she feels morally that would be wrong then who am I to judge her. She sounds as if she will try to do the right thing. The right thing in some minds will be different then the right thing in others minds. One must remember when on a public forum you are among a diverse community and everyone has their own beliefs. Some here are laid back some are very opinionated. If a thread is going in a direction you disagree with then post so and move on. Maybe people just need to learn to post their opinions and leave it. If the op says that is not for them then wish them well and move on.
One must remember that we need to help educate here and not judge and I personally if I were asking for advise or help would not take it from someone who is in a sense bashing me. EDUCATE DON'T JUDGE. Education should be given in a manner so it can be received . We seem sometimes to forget that people will follow good advice if you deliver it in a positive manner. If you bash me I sure will not hear you because I go into defense mode.

whatszmatter · Mar 30, 2007

I didn't read a rude post in that thread, There is a ton of good info in there, everyone seemed to be contributing something. And just because someone says they aren't going to abort the puppies, doesn't mean everyone that knows there's a better chance that the puppies, if born healthy, will be bounced around from home to home, and some will be put to sleep probably anyway eventually, than actually living a full enjoyable life, has to suddenly agree that having the pups is in the best interest for all involved.

I happen to agree, make the tough decision now, or later after failed home after failed home, or sitting in a kennel at a shelter till its put to sleep. GSD's easily have 6-10 pups or more in a litter. She could luck out and have a small one. Inexperienced owner (although looking for help, very admirable), adopted dog, pregnant from uknown background etc, usually adds up to a less than desireable situation.

anyway, I don't think anyone was rude in that other thread.

CanadianK9 · Mar 30, 2007

I have not read the controversial threads in question. But you know, this is why there has been alot of people who have quit chaz or decided not to join. Now, alot of people claim they are "stating their opinion" and that they have "nothing but good intentions" but you ever step back and wonder how you are projecting yourselves? You want to know why alot of people dont post anything very often about stuff like that? Its because everyone jumps on them regardless of what they choose.

Now I dont mean to accuse anyone specificlyof this, the people that do this are vast and know who they are, I couldnt honestly care who specificly it is. But when everytime someone posts something of a similar nature to the thread mentioned and people only reply with posts saying what they think of the situation it doesnt help.

They ask for advice NOT opinions, they are seeking options NOT what you think the situation SHOULD be in a perfect world. Sometimes people have situations come up that cant be helped, and guess what they dont need the extra stress of having to wade through all the cr@p just to find the options and advice they simply asked for in the beginning.

I do realize that there is a insanely vast amount of chazzers. But do you think it is honestly necessary to scold everone coming here for advice and options? Is it really necessary to state your "opinion" in every thread that did not ask for it? because thats mainly what the chaz community is projecting.

Respect is a rare thing and I honestly think that we could use to give a bit more of it than we are now. Lets try saying something nice, instead of trying to project to them that they are "wrong" to not go with others visions of a perfect world.

I remember a particulary wise influence in my life telling me something, and its simply this "You may not agree with everybodys choices, ideals, methods, opinions or thoughts, but at least respect them"

Of which most chazzers tend not to do, lets try giving more respect for others.

Aussie Red · Mar 30, 2007

CanadianK9 said:

I have not read the controversial threads in question. But you know, this is why there has been alot of people who have quit chaz or decided not to join. Now, alot of people claim they are "stating their opinion" and that they have "nothing but good intentions" but you ever step back and wonder how you are projecting yourselves? You want to know why alot of people dont post anything very often about stuff like that? Its because everyone jumps on them regardless of what they choose.

Now I dont mean to accuse anyone specificlyof this, the people that do this are vast and know who they are, I couldnt honestly care who specificly it is. But when everytime someone posts something of a similar nature to the thread mentioned and people only reply with posts saying what they think of the situation it doesnt help.

They ask for advice NOT opinions, they are seeking options NOT what you think the situation SHOULD be in a perfect world. Sometimes people have situations come up that cant be helped, and guess what they dont need the extra stress of having to wade through all the cr@p just to find the options and advice they simply asked for in the beginning.

I do realize that there is a insanely vast amount of chazzers. But do you think it is honestly necessary to scold everone coming here for advice and options? Is it really necessary to state your "opinion" in every thread that did not ask for it? because thats mainly what the chaz community is projecting.

Respect is a rare thing and I honestly think that we could use to give a bit more of it than we are now. Lets try saying something nice, instead of trying to project to them that they are "wrong" to not go with others visions of a perfect world.

I remember a particulary wise influence in my life telling me something, and its simply this "You may not agree with everybodys choices, ideals, methods, opinions or thoughts, but at least respect them"

Of which most chazzers tend not to do, lets try giving more respect for others.

:hail: :hail: :hail: :hail: That is what I am saying too. When a thread is started asking for advice on how to do something then keep your personal beliefs out of it and help or don't post.

Angel Chicken · Mar 30, 2007

Bravo CK9, Well said.

daaqa · Mar 30, 2007

as someone new to the forum, and therefore somewhat of an outside observer, i would have to say that i have seen lots of posts where people are jumped on prematurely. assumptions are made and people are labelled very quickly, before the full story can be brought out. i am not sure about the thread in question, but i have seen it lots on other threads.

there are lots and lots of people who are very well-meaning and just really ignorant and maybe raised to view dogs in a certain way. even if they are totally wrong, slamming them [even with the best intentions] will just keep them where they are and probably scare them away from the very people that could change their perspective - you guys! gently educating them will bring them to your side and make their dogs' lives happier in the long run.

How Can You Guys Be So Rude????

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