I was in a relationship when I was younger (17-19) that is similar to yours. Same name of the guy too
Its very easy when you are on the outside to see the signs, to get upset, to get frustrated. Its NOT easy when you are living it. If your Josh is like mine was, he was a master manipulator and pathological liar. Someone would tell me "Oh, he told me he is trying to break up with you"...I would confront him and get "I did think that, I was so confused. But I have realized I really love you blah blah blah." Hell, right before we broke up he was asking me to move out of state with him, we were researching apartments, schools, etc. I was sending out applications even. Then I didnt hear from him for a couple days (as was consistent to his pattern) and when I finally did get a hold of him, yep, a girl answered (NOW know that was part of his pattern too).
He was (well, is I am sure) bi polar and has a whole host of other issues. Living with the ups and downs, it gets really hard to see whats real. I feel for you, I do. Your whole world has turned upside down, you lost someone you thought to be your life, etc.
HOWEVER, I can promise, once you get some space and clarity you will realize how f'ed up the whole situation was. You will emerge stronger and better for rising above the drama.
Also, because you are pregnant, yep, you got to suck it up buttercup. Its ok to be hurt, its not something you can control and its normal. BUT you do have to figure out like now healthy ways to cope.
Its very easy when you are on the outside to see the signs, to get upset, to get frustrated. Its NOT easy when you are living it. If your Josh is like mine was, he was a master manipulator and pathological liar. Someone would tell me "Oh, he told me he is trying to break up with you"...I would confront him and get "I did think that, I was so confused. But I have realized I really love you blah blah blah." Hell, right before we broke up he was asking me to move out of state with him, we were researching apartments, schools, etc. I was sending out applications even. Then I didnt hear from him for a couple days (as was consistent to his pattern) and when I finally did get a hold of him, yep, a girl answered (NOW know that was part of his pattern too).
He was (well, is I am sure) bi polar and has a whole host of other issues. Living with the ups and downs, it gets really hard to see whats real. I feel for you, I do. Your whole world has turned upside down, you lost someone you thought to be your life, etc.
HOWEVER, I can promise, once you get some space and clarity you will realize how f'ed up the whole situation was. You will emerge stronger and better for rising above the drama.
Also, because you are pregnant, yep, you got to suck it up buttercup. Its ok to be hurt, its not something you can control and its normal. BUT you do have to figure out like now healthy ways to cope.
First thing you have to get some nutrician in you. Pediasure, Boost, etc, as well as any nutricious solid food you can get down. Your body is likely stealing nutrients from itself to nurish the baby right now. Peanut butter toast, grilled chicken, eggs, yogurt, and whatever fruit or veggies you can stomach and wash it down with the Sprite to help settle your stomach. Are you sure the vomiting is emotional or could it have a physical cause you should be seeing your OB about?
I know this sucks and I'm not going to sit here and tell you that you need to just be able to snap your fingers and get over it. However, you do need to learn healthy ways to deal with this and you must be focused like a laser beam on this unborn child even though it will mean focusing through a considerable amount of hurt in the beginning.