I'm miserable for all the wrong reasons

Doberluv

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#21
You might see about starting in one of those maid services or start your own. House cleaning, especially in an affluent area can be very good money. When I lived in north Idaho, there was very little work. But people had summer cabins. Some of them they rented out on a week or two week at a time home. I started with I think two customers and it just spread by word of mouth. I charged $20.00 an hour, 3 hour minimum and did one house a day. Some other people who did this same thing did 2-3 houses a day. They were more energetic than I was. But it paid my bills and I felt so much more in charge. $20.00 an hour is probably very low compared to a big city. This was a little resort area and people either had no money or lots of money to have vacation cabins on the lake. Anyhow, that's one idea.

I think if there's any way you can drum up a business of your own, that can be much more lucrative. But, if not, go work for a store or see about a receptionist type job. There are places that will help with resumes. Another thing I did was school bus driving. It pays well. You go to a training program....very short. I think it was a month or two long. In the meantime you could have a job at McDonalds or something...just to hang in there. School bus driving is a huge responsibility, but depending on districts, it pays very well and you get benefits once you have your own route. Often, you start out as a substitute driver, which is challenging.

Another thing is you might be able to get a job in a pharmacy as a B tech. (I don't know if they have the same names in Canada) But that pay isn't bad and you get benefits. They often train you on the job and meanwhile, you can take the course to become an A tech. (a higher paying tech with more training)

So, those are just a few jobs I thought of that I have done in the past before I started training dogs professionally.
 

~Jessie~

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#22
Yea, I gotta say, this is the bottom line. I have to admit that this improbable series of ever-escalating events is making my BS meter spike into the red and I'm not inclined to feed into that part of it.

However, having said that, that doesn't mean I don't think that Stephy needs or deserves help. If it's all true, she needs help. If it's all made up, she needs help. Either way, advice on the specifics of hooking is probably less helpful than encouraging pursuit of some mental health assistance.

So here: this is what a quick Google of "vancouver canada mental health services indigent" brings up. Something like 400 organizations, not all relevant. But I'd suggest while you're looking for a job and trying to get your house back from whoever seized it, you browse through that list and get some real help.
This!
 

Doberluv

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#23
I think it's very high risk to be suggesting that Steph is making things up, being manipulative or lying. There is no proof. It's better to give the benefit of the doubt in a situation like this. If you don't want to go along with these threads, don't like them, then don't post. Like they say, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. It's just too damaging if you're wrong.

She's been told she needs help one way or the other, been given ideas, sympathy, and support. Let's all just continue to either do that or nothing at all.

jmo
 

Saintgirl

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#24
I too live in Canada. We have universal health care and this INCLUDES social workers, psychiatrists and other mental health care workers. Stephy, I don't know you but believe me when I say I hope you get the help you need. I am not going to sugar coat anything here but sometimes we need a little slap in the face to wake up. You need to stop using your troubles as a crutch because it only makes things tougher in the long run. You have hit a rough part of your life right now but like all things this too will pass. I had a very rough few years as have many others. I could have turned down the wrong path but I chose not to. Key word is CHOSE. I don't believe for one minute that you can't find work, it is the holiday season and many places are hiring temporary workers, you are surrounded by some of the best ski hills in North America (and they are ALWAYS hiring) even if you had to move to some of these they do have staff housing. In my early 20's I had nothing, no family, no friends, no anything and I made my way out to Lake Louise was hired on the spot and this included my staff accomodations! Yup, I picked cig. butts out of snow banks and gum off of chairs but it was better than nothing. You have to want to get out of this rut, you have to stop making excuses and be determinded that you are going to change. You are a young adult now and you have to be able to depend on yourself, so make up your mind to just do it. You are lucky that you live in Canada where we have these resources readily available to help you succeed---but only you can take that step forward. Btw, a quick look on the Canada Job Bank posts nearly 55 THOUSAND jobs in BC. Sure, you may not be qualified for many of them but cleaners, live-in care workers, fast food joints are all hiring! I'm glad that you have the support of many of the members here but I will not condone stooping to prostitution. Not here, not when we live in a country where we have other resources. You need to take responsibility for yourself and get yourself the help you DESERVE!
 

Doberluv

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#25
I too live in Canada. We have universal health care and this INCLUDES social workers, psychiatrists and other mental health care workers. Stephy, I don't know you but believe me when I say I hope you get the help you need. I am not going to sugar coat anything here but sometimes we need a little slap in the face to wake up. You need to stop using your troubles as a crutch because it only makes things tougher in the long run. You have hit a rough part of your life right now but like all things this too will pass. I had a very rough few years as have many others. I could have turned down the wrong path but I chose not to. Key word is CHOSE. I don't believe for one minute that you can't find work, it is the holiday season and many places are hiring temporary workers, you are surrounded by some of the best ski hills in North America (and they are ALWAYS hiring) even if you had to move to some of these they do have staff housing. In my early 20's I had nothing, no family, no friends, no anything and I made my way out to Lake Louise was hired on the spot and this included my staff accomodations! Yup, I picked cig. butts out of snow banks and gum off of chairs but it was better than nothing. You have to want to get out of this rut, you have to stop making excuses and be determinded that you are going to change. You are a young adult now and you have to be able to depend on yourself, so make up your mind to just do it. You are lucky that you live in Canada where we have these resources readily available to help you succeed---but only you can take that step forward. Btw, a quick look on the Canada Job Bank posts nearly 55 THOUSAND jobs in BC. Sure, you may not be qualified for many of them but cleaners, live-in care workers, fast food joints are all hiring! I'm glad that you have the support of many of the members here but I will not condone stooping to prostitution. Not here, not when we live in a country where we have other resources. You need to take responsibility for yourself and get yourself the help you DESERVE!
:hail::hail::hail:
 
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#26
I think it's very high risk to be suggesting that Steph is making things up, being manipulative or lying. There is no proof. It's better to give the benefit of the doubt in a situation like this. If you don't want to go along with these threads, don't like them, then don't post. Like they say, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. It's just too damaging if you're wrong.

She's been told she needs help one way or the other, been given ideas, sympathy, and support. Let's all just continue to either do that or nothing at all.

jmo
Not entirely sure who you're addressing, so this may be unnecessary. I don't think anyone needs to go, "Meh. Screw you, I think you're making it up." And I don't think most (if any) are. But feeding into it can also be dangerous. So I think an honest approach and solid advice, while also showing an uncertainty and some amount of suspicion that may help to protect a well-intentioned Chazzer from being hurt, should be just as welcome in this thread as any other post.
 

CaliTerp07

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#27
Stephy, how can people help you? Do you need a referral to a trustworthy counselor or social worker? Do you need advice on next steps to take? Do you need someone to help you find a lawyer willing to hear your case?
 

Doberluv

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#28
Not entirely sure who you're addressing, so this may be unnecessary. I don't think anyone needs to go, "Meh. Screw you, I think you're making it up." And I don't think most (if any) are. But feeding into it can also be dangerous. So I think an honest approach and solid advice, while also showing an uncertainty and some amount of suspicion that may help to protect a well-intentioned Chazzer from being hurt, should be just as welcome in this thread as any other post.
Perhaps you're right about feeding into it not necessarily being helpful. I'm not exactly sure what you mean though, by "feeding" into it. But anyhow, since we don't know enough, can't see into the depths of the whole thing, it seems risky to withhold sympathy, caring, and trust. I don't know how that could hurt Chazzers. Kind words don't cost anything. It's better to let 10 guilty people go free than it is to hang one innocent.
 
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#29
I think it's very high risk to be suggesting that Steph is making things up, being manipulative or lying. There is no proof. It's better to give the benefit of the doubt in a situation like this. If you don't want to go along with these threads, don't like them, then don't post. Like they say, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. It's just too damaging if you're wrong.

She's been told she needs help one way or the other, been given ideas, sympathy, and support. Let's all just continue to either do that or nothing at all.

jmo
If it is indeed made up, I actually think it is extremely harmful to feed into it.

Being skeptical of the details of the story doesn't automatically make anyone unsympathetic or unsupportive to Stephy's plight. Because whatever is going on and however close or far the real situation is to what we are reading here, Stephy needs the help of a mental health professional. THAT is the important thing and the bottom line. If you looked at the link I provided, the resources are there, she just had to use them.

jmo
 
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#30
Perhaps you're right about feeding into it not necessarily being helpful. I'm not exactly sure what you mean though, by "feeding" into it. But anyhow, since we don't know enough, can't see into the depths of the whole thing, it seems risky to withhold sympathy, caring, and trust. I don't know how that could hurt Chazzers. Kind words don't cost anything. It's better to let 10 guilty people go free than it is to hang one innocent.
But this is a false dichotomy. It's not "either you believe the story or you are withholding sympathy and caring." I believe Stephy is in a great deal of pain and I am sympathetic to it, I just really have a hard time believing all the things I've read here and I refuse to feed into the escalatingly bizarre stories.
 

milos_mommy

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#31
This might be an unpopular opinion, but, Stefy - you might want to look into doing some kind of fetish parties (like foot fetish). They're sketchy and the guys at the parties are sometimes REALLY creepy, but if you're careful it's way safer than prostitution , and probably less unpleasant. It doesn't pay as much, but the money isn't bad at all, and some places do try hard to keep the girls who work for them safe.
 

Doberluv

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#32
But this is a false dichotomy. It's not "either you believe the story or you are withholding sympathy and caring." I believe Stephy is in a great deal of pain and I am sympathetic to it, I just really have a hard time believing all the things I've read here and I refuse to feed into the escalatingly bizarre stories.
I see. But you don't have to believe it. And you don't have to feed into it if you don't.;)
 

Doberluv

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#33
This might be an unpopular opinion, but, Stefy - you might want to look into doing some kind of fetish parties (like foot fetish). They're sketchy and the guys at the parties are sometimes REALLY creepy, but if you're careful it's way safer than prostitution , and probably less unpleasant. It doesn't pay as much, but the money isn't bad at all, and some places do try hard to keep the girls who work for them safe.
No offense, but I think Steph is too vulnerable to be exposed to creepy guys and sketchy work. One thing can lead to another and she'll be right back into the company of low brows. There are too many other viable options, imo.
 

milos_mommy

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#35
No offense, but I think Steph is too vulnerable to be exposed to creepy guys and sketchy work. One thing can lead to another and she'll be right back into the company of low brows. There are too many other viable options, imo.
She's currently working as a prostitute. And people on here have been sending her links and references and giving her advice on how to get help for weeks and weeks, and it hasn't worked. She's not going to stop because strangers on the internet told her she's too vulnerable to be a hooker, or because someone's sent her a link to free mental health care or a lawyer.

And IMO a legal job standing in a back room at a club with a bunch of other women wearing high heels so that a bunch of creepy men can jack off while staring at their feet is safer than going somewhere alone to illegally sell sex to them.
 

Doberluv

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#37
Ok, we're not in disagreement? :confused:
I have no idea. :rofl1: I'm too confused most of the time.

Yes Milo...she is saying she doesn't plan to go back to it tonight. I still think Steph needs to stand for something. And that something needs to be healthy. Not a little bit less unhealthy. But healthy. It will help her self esteem and give her some incentive to climb out of this hole. Working in a place like what you describe, imo, isn't going to do the trick. (oops, pardon the pun):doh:
 
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#38
This. I cannot even believe there are people on here supporting this. McDonald's is always hiring. I am sincerely disgusted by the support given of her choice. I'm still edging on the hope that it's not true.
What else can you do other than support it? Living at a women's shelter and doing menial jobs are "below" her. The psychiatric facility was "deplorable" because they expected her to change her own sheets and didn't provide room service for meals. No need for anyone to get pissed over me saying so, because these are things she's written herself. But then, I'm not buying the aforementioned "improbable series of ever-escalating events." I would encourage people to use their analytical mind rather than their emotional/nurturing one. How well do any of us, including those directly aiding her, know this person? For all anyone knows, Stephy herself could be the one with a warrant out for her arrest and needed to stash her dog while she bounces from place to place. I'm not necessarily posing that situation as anything I personally believe to be fact, but how do any of us know it's not? The only thing I'll agree to believe until proven otherwise is that this person is in serious need of mental health services.

If somehow all of this IS true, women's shelters in BC, at least the ones I know of, are very nice, very supportive places. You have *no* need to spend any money while you're staying there - the kitchen is always stocked, toiletries and clothing are provided, and you have your own room. Social workers are available 24/7 if you need assistance, counseling or simply someone to talk to, and to set you up with additional resources. Local stores and organizations donate items to decorate or use in your own home once you leave the shelter. It's a secure, safe place for women in need to get back on their feet. Call and tell the staff (available by phone 24/7) that you need a place to stay, and you'll have it. You may have to go to a different city, but that will give you 30 days to find a job, find a place, and save every dollar to put towards making a life for yourself. Oh - you will have to do one chore a day to contribute to the house, though. And cook every now and then. And make your own bed. But that's because it's not a hotel, it's a temporary home. There is absolutely no reason for you to be prostituting yourself unless you: a) enjoy it b) want to punish yourself or c) are full of sh**.

ETA: http://www.elizabethfry.com/
 

MandyPug

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#39
What else can you do other than support it? Living at a women's shelter and doing menial jobs are "below" her. The psychiatric facility was "deplorable" because they expected her to change her own sheets and didn't provide room service for meals. No need for anyone to get pissed over me saying so, because these are things she's written herself. But then, I'm not buying the aforementioned "improbable series of ever-escalating events." I would encourage people to use their analytical mind rather than their emotional/nurturing one. How well do any of us, including those directly aiding her, know this person? For all anyone knows, Stephy herself could be the one with a warrant out for her arrest and needed to stash her dog while she bounces from place to place. I'm not necessarily posing that situation as anything I personally believe to be fact, but how do any of us know it's not? The only thing I'll agree to believe until proven otherwise is that this person is in serious need of mental health services.

If somehow all of this IS true, women's shelters in BC, at least the ones I know of, are very nice, very supportive places. You have *no* need to spend any money while you're staying there - the kitchen is always stocked, toiletries and clothing are provided, and you have your own room. Social workers are available 24/7 if you need assistance, counseling or simply someone to talk to, and to set you up with additional resources. Local stores and organizations donate items to decorate or use in your own home once you leave the shelter. It's a secure, safe place for women in need to get back on their feet. Call and tell the staff (available by phone 24/7) that you need a place to stay, and you'll have it. You may have to go to a different city, but that will give you 30 days to find a job, find a place, and save every dollar to put towards making a life for yourself. Oh - you will have to do one chore a day to contribute to the house, though. And cook every now and then. And make your own bed. But that's because it's not a hotel, it's a temporary home. There is absolutely no reason for you to be prostituting yourself unless you: a) enjoy it b) want to punish yourself or c) are full of sh**.

ETA: http://www.elizabethfry.com/
Pretty much that.

We're not talking some tiny run down town with one shelter and a church, this is a huge area with a lot of places willing to help out.

http://www.bchousing.org/Options/Emergency_Housing/ESP
http://vancouver.ca/people-programs/financial-aid.aspx
http://vancouver.ca/people-programs/supportive-housing.aspx
http://vancouver.ca/files/cov/services-in-downtown-eastside.pdf
 

Twin_Dogs

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#40
For someone who has access to internet who is desperately wanting a job, she has more time posting on a dog forum instead of JOB BANK website.

I am actually very surprised that she announced on a public forum that she is going to work the trade, if I am not mistaken in one post, she even mentioned the place and time where she is going to work, and said feel free to look her up AS IF this kind of job isnt high risk already, let's put the ante up by "LETTING PEOPLE KNOW WHERE AND WHEN I WORK". This is disturbing. In many ways.

THERE ARE CHOICES. In Canada, we are quite spoiled with everything that is handed to us, support wise. Health care, shelters and job bank that helps people WHO ARE REALLY looking for a job find one.

Easy money is what you want. And if everything you wrote here is true, your choices have consequences. But if you are just making things up to play on people's emotions and feelings, that is just horrible.
 

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