Unique Breeds - What's Yours?
- Thread starter Renee750il
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Virgos--can be of multiple breeds, generally characterized by uncanny intelligence and a penchant for unparalleled troublemaking. Virgos do well with smart owners who are possessed of a good sense of humor and ability to think outside the box. This is not a breed for anyone not prepared to take great measures to ensure their safety, nor should persons unable to deal with e-vets knowing their voice over the phone consider bringing a Virgo into their household. Typically, Virgos are not recommended for non-homeowners, as they are almost guaranteed to cost the owner their security deposit unless they are owed favors by handymen.
:rofl1:
Nyx's are not for the lazy. A day off from a miles long run will cause an excess of energy and a day without training will cause boredom. This can quickly become a dangerous combination resulting in important household items being shredded, like the phone cord, so you can't call for assistance, a missing doorknob so you can't lock her in the house ever again, broken furniture so you can no longer sit down.
Morgan's require an owner who enjoys wearing fur, and lots of it. They will shed constantly and all the clothing and furniture will have hair embedded in them permanently. Morgan's are adorable and it's very easy to be suckered in by this, so they are best suited for owners who are blind.
Ares' are best owned by people who have eyes on the back of their head. They are very intelligent and even more, they are clever. They will know when you are unable to see them, even if you're sitting next to them and will use that moment to gain access to something toxic.
Nyx's are not for the lazy. A day off from a miles long run will cause an excess of energy and a day without training will cause boredom. This can quickly become a dangerous combination resulting in important household items being shredded, like the phone cord, so you can't call for assistance, a missing doorknob so you can't lock her in the house ever again, broken furniture so you can no longer sit down.
Morgan's require an owner who enjoys wearing fur, and lots of it. They will shed constantly and all the clothing and furniture will have hair embedded in them permanently. Morgan's are adorable and it's very easy to be suckered in by this, so they are best suited for owners who are blind.
Ares' are best owned by people who have eyes on the back of their head. They are very intelligent and even more, they are clever. They will know when you are unable to see them, even if you're sitting next to them and will use that moment to gain access to something toxic.
Kiba's are best suited for people that cannot hear. They are smart, spiteful, and full of **** and vinegar. Some can be very cuddly, but don't wait around for kisses. Their big brown eyes they use to their advantage, and if that doesnt work a good talking back will settle the deal. They can be known to claw eyes out. Standard model comes with: fat, and attitude.
Stryder's are best suited for people that live on trampolines. Stryder's are known to non-stop hop hop hop about, though this could be connected to them having ADHD. Brains will appear at about 3 years of age. They are very naughty, but so cute it's hard to laugh at them. Standard model comes with: allergies, and flea.
Stryder's are best suited for people that live on trampolines. Stryder's are known to non-stop hop hop hop about, though this could be connected to them having ADHD. Brains will appear at about 3 years of age. They are very naughty, but so cute it's hard to laugh at them. Standard model comes with: allergies, and flea.
Lizzie's are not for the average dog owner. Lizzie's are stubborn, smart, demanding, nevous, closterphobic, and are alpha dogs.
Lizzie's can be the sweetest, most people person dog you've ever met. Then the next second be a "People? What are People?". Or extremely sweet to a dog, then the next second telling them off.
Lizzie's are moody dogs.
Blaze's are not for the faint of heart either. Blaze's like THERE person. They also like balls. . .or anything round. But Blaze's can also be sensitive to any kind of correction. Blaze's also like to hop. . .and hop and hop and hop. They like to be near your face/shoulder. They like to cuddle. But don't let that fool you, if they get bored when you aren't around. WATCH OUT! Your pillow or blanket will be all over your floor
Jake's are. . .interesting. Jake's are like most men. They have selctive hearing.
Lizzie's can be the sweetest, most people person dog you've ever met. Then the next second be a "People? What are People?". Or extremely sweet to a dog, then the next second telling them off.
Lizzie's are moody dogs.
Blaze's are not for the faint of heart either. Blaze's like THERE person. They also like balls. . .or anything round. But Blaze's can also be sensitive to any kind of correction. Blaze's also like to hop. . .and hop and hop and hop. They like to be near your face/shoulder. They like to cuddle. But don't let that fool you, if they get bored when you aren't around. WATCH OUT! Your pillow or blanket will be all over your floor
Jake's are. . .interesting. Jake's are like most men. They have selctive hearing.
Saramas are not recommended for the unobservant. Keenly intelligent, they know perfectly well when you are not watching them, and will have long since dreamed up a devious scheme to execute in your moments of inattention. Although never something you have told them not to do, you are unlikley to be pleased with the results of this plan, since Saramas are capable of dreaming up forms of trouble that humans, with their limited intelligence, would never have conceived.
Nor are they for lovers of a neat and tidy home; not only do they blow coat in the spring, they are bound to leave pieces of squeaky toys, bones, and unindenifiable remains scattered everywhere, since anything given to them to chew will quickly be reduced to the smallest possible constituant parts. Some scientists have speculated that they may actually be able to split atoms, making them a viable substitute for nuclear power . . . if they could be convinced to do so on command instead of leaping onto the nearest bed for pats.
Suckers should avoid Saramas. Despite their somewhat feral appearence, they are capable of delivering looks that are so agonizingly cute that it could be used as a form of torture. Moreover, they know the effect of this ability and will mercilessly use it, especially to gain food or the privilege of coming in from the yard.
Owners should either be Olympic athletes or able to take a Sarama to the dog park at least twice a week. Saramas need to run a full tilt for at least two hours before being tired, preferably over rough terrain, with sharp turns, and quite a few high-speed collisions involved. Wrestling, rolling, and swimming in mud puddles are optional. Since most humans are unable or unwillng to provide this level of excercise, its better to find other dogs that are willing to amuse your Sarama.
On the other hand, owners looking for a beautiful, intelligent, obedient (usually) and downright hilarious companion can not do better than a Sarama. They are also outstanding footwarmers.
Nor are they for lovers of a neat and tidy home; not only do they blow coat in the spring, they are bound to leave pieces of squeaky toys, bones, and unindenifiable remains scattered everywhere, since anything given to them to chew will quickly be reduced to the smallest possible constituant parts. Some scientists have speculated that they may actually be able to split atoms, making them a viable substitute for nuclear power . . . if they could be convinced to do so on command instead of leaping onto the nearest bed for pats.
Suckers should avoid Saramas. Despite their somewhat feral appearence, they are capable of delivering looks that are so agonizingly cute that it could be used as a form of torture. Moreover, they know the effect of this ability and will mercilessly use it, especially to gain food or the privilege of coming in from the yard.
Owners should either be Olympic athletes or able to take a Sarama to the dog park at least twice a week. Saramas need to run a full tilt for at least two hours before being tired, preferably over rough terrain, with sharp turns, and quite a few high-speed collisions involved. Wrestling, rolling, and swimming in mud puddles are optional. Since most humans are unable or unwillng to provide this level of excercise, its better to find other dogs that are willing to amuse your Sarama.
On the other hand, owners looking for a beautiful, intelligent, obedient (usually) and downright hilarious companion can not do better than a Sarama. They are also outstanding footwarmers.
Tallulah's are characterized by explosive diarrhea of the mouth, generally when they are laying in the vicinity of their owner's head. There are no warning symptoms. It is brought on by sounds - real or imaginary. A particularly volatile episode can cause temporary deafness. The effect is exacerbated by the fact that Tallulahs will only consent to sleep in close proximity to the owner, preferably with their heads laying on the owner's neck, shoulder or even head.
Tallulahs only have two speeds. Mach 5 and snuggle. Both are disarming. Mach 5 is a burst of frenzied cuteness that leaves the owner helpless to scold and is nearly always followed by sudden snuggling, which is disarmingly charming. Resistance is futile.
Tallulahs are accomplished counter surfers and rogues. When caught, the eyes get big and the lower lip protrudes in a reflex action that causes what is known as the Pittie Pout. It is a defense mechanism with no known method of neutralization, particularly when combined with the Stinking Cute Head and Ear Side Cock. Again. Resistance is futile.
Tallulahs are extremely useful for keeping large dogs in top condition. They will wrestle, play tag and chase, Whack-a-Dog (requires purchase of Orbee tug ball option) and even, on occasion, Whack-an-Owner. They will make do with an old sock and will poke dogs/owner with sock repeatedly until they receive the proper tug response. Again. Resistance is futile.
Tallulahs also make excellent garbage disposals and will eat any sort of human grade food. They will pre-rinse dishes, clean out cans and containers to prepare for disposal, and rigidly enforce the three-second rule. Tallulahs also make good diet aids if kept in the room when owner is eating as they are willing receptacles for those last few bites - or first few, or some in the middle - that are a risk for waistlines. Indeed, they will enforce portion control. Yes, resistance is futile.
They are incomparable thieves and will steal your heart with a glance, a nudge, a head snuggle into your neck. Resistance is futile.
Tallulahs only have two speeds. Mach 5 and snuggle. Both are disarming. Mach 5 is a burst of frenzied cuteness that leaves the owner helpless to scold and is nearly always followed by sudden snuggling, which is disarmingly charming. Resistance is futile.
Tallulahs are accomplished counter surfers and rogues. When caught, the eyes get big and the lower lip protrudes in a reflex action that causes what is known as the Pittie Pout. It is a defense mechanism with no known method of neutralization, particularly when combined with the Stinking Cute Head and Ear Side Cock. Again. Resistance is futile.
Tallulahs are extremely useful for keeping large dogs in top condition. They will wrestle, play tag and chase, Whack-a-Dog (requires purchase of Orbee tug ball option) and even, on occasion, Whack-an-Owner. They will make do with an old sock and will poke dogs/owner with sock repeatedly until they receive the proper tug response. Again. Resistance is futile.
Tallulahs also make excellent garbage disposals and will eat any sort of human grade food. They will pre-rinse dishes, clean out cans and containers to prepare for disposal, and rigidly enforce the three-second rule. Tallulahs also make good diet aids if kept in the room when owner is eating as they are willing receptacles for those last few bites - or first few, or some in the middle - that are a risk for waistlines. Indeed, they will enforce portion control. Yes, resistance is futile.
They are incomparable thieves and will steal your heart with a glance, a nudge, a head snuggle into your neck. Resistance is futile.
An Uncle Fred is an excellent enforcer of an exercize regimen since he knows exactly when you should bike or hike. The slightest delay will result in him watching you fixedly and exuberantly howling at the slightest movememtn in the direction of the door or shoe closet.
An Uncle Fred is also a handy motion activated alarm system with recognition for different sorts of intruders. This alarm system produces different tones for friend- animal or human, and foe. In addition to warning occupants, the "foe" alert acts as a deterrent in and of itself.
The Uncle Fred is paid a per diem by several local chiropracters since his demand to sleep at the foot of your bed will cause you to sleep in various pretzel positions and develop an assortment of missalignments. Resistance is futile, if you push him off he will return once you have fallen asleep anyway.
The Mini is a combination disposal and pot scrubber. She can remove even stuck or burnt on foods from any pot or pan, and is willing to eat plate leavings and scrap in any condition, and of any variety.
She is a champion foot or body warmer.
Mini is also valuable as a weight loss aid. since she finds a way to eat all of anything she likes, no matter how hard you try to keep it away from her, and since the only things she does not like are low in calories, high in fiber, and not very appetizing, you will find that weight loss is inevitable.
An Uncle Fred is also a handy motion activated alarm system with recognition for different sorts of intruders. This alarm system produces different tones for friend- animal or human, and foe. In addition to warning occupants, the "foe" alert acts as a deterrent in and of itself.
The Uncle Fred is paid a per diem by several local chiropracters since his demand to sleep at the foot of your bed will cause you to sleep in various pretzel positions and develop an assortment of missalignments. Resistance is futile, if you push him off he will return once you have fallen asleep anyway.
The Mini is a combination disposal and pot scrubber. She can remove even stuck or burnt on foods from any pot or pan, and is willing to eat plate leavings and scrap in any condition, and of any variety.
She is a champion foot or body warmer.
Mini is also valuable as a weight loss aid. since she finds a way to eat all of anything she likes, no matter how hard you try to keep it away from her, and since the only things she does not like are low in calories, high in fiber, and not very appetizing, you will find that weight loss is inevitable.
Zeuses ---Zeuses are very mellow, cuddly, and sensitive. Don't get a Zeus to keep thieves away. They are characterized by their complete lack of any protective instinct whatsoever. And while incredibly sweet, Zeuses can be rather *cough* dim upstairs.
Voodoos --- Anybody with sanity and concern for their property value should stay away from these dogs. Voodoos are prone to sudden unstoppable bursts of mayhem that spout forth at completely random intervals. They can leap to heights of 6 feet or greater, pivot and turn at high speeds, and can smash through most modern construction materials without blinking. Voodoos enjoy rope tugs, publicly humiliating their owners and the occasional bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Voodoos --- Anybody with sanity and concern for their property value should stay away from these dogs. Voodoos are prone to sudden unstoppable bursts of mayhem that spout forth at completely random intervals. They can leap to heights of 6 feet or greater, pivot and turn at high speeds, and can smash through most modern construction materials without blinking. Voodoos enjoy rope tugs, publicly humiliating their owners and the occasional bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Daisys - these dogs are usually lab types. They live for FOOD and nothing else, which makes them easy to train. They like to lay around a lot, but are ready go to out and play whenever you are. They are rather aloof dogs; they don't want or need a lot of affection, but they like to be in the same room as their family, just hanging out. They like other dogs so long as those dogs are respectful of body language; rude dogs tend to irritate them.
Benjis - these dogs are terrier types. They require patience and a sense of humor. They live to play, and be cuddled by their people. Benjis are happy enough to lay around for a few hours or so, but after their nap they are ready to play, and will sit and stare at you, making grumbling sounds until you get off your butt and take them outside. If you make them really impatient, the grumbling sounds turn to woo-wooing and barking. Benjis tend to be difficult to train because they have a short attention span, and are not particularly food driven. Benjis are toy driven at times, and this may be used to one's advantage. Benjis tend to be prey driven, and may exhibit some same-sex dog aggression, especially to dogs larger than they are. Benjis believe they are ten feet tall and indestructible, and will readily accept a challenge posited to them by another dog. Care must be taken that Benjis don't get themselves hurt taking on more than they can handle.
Benjis - these dogs are terrier types. They require patience and a sense of humor. They live to play, and be cuddled by their people. Benjis are happy enough to lay around for a few hours or so, but after their nap they are ready to play, and will sit and stare at you, making grumbling sounds until you get off your butt and take them outside. If you make them really impatient, the grumbling sounds turn to woo-wooing and barking. Benjis tend to be difficult to train because they have a short attention span, and are not particularly food driven. Benjis are toy driven at times, and this may be used to one's advantage. Benjis tend to be prey driven, and may exhibit some same-sex dog aggression, especially to dogs larger than they are. Benjis believe they are ten feet tall and indestructible, and will readily accept a challenge posited to them by another dog. Care must be taken that Benjis don't get themselves hurt taking on more than they can handle.